I saw RED today

The remnants of a red popsicle was all that was remaining of a day that started out with so much promise but ended in utter heart break.

Tonight, is my birthday and I just know that my boyfriend is going to ask me to marry him at least that is my secret hope.

When I jumped out of bed that morning like every day that week at 5:30 sharp, though I had anxiety deep in the pit of my gut I rushed out the door to the gym. After my hour-long Pilates class, I showered and got ready for work.

Halfway through my workday I decided to treat myself to an extremely high calorie, high carb lunch. As I was returning to my office who do I see but my wonderful, amazing boyfriend. But what else do I see? I see him reach up into the face of a very pretty brunette and push her hair out of her face like he has done to me a million time over the last three years. I want to run over and kick him well you know where. But I don’t I just quietly watch the two of them interact for about fifteen minutes. As I do so I see that smile I so love. That dimple he said was mine. Staring into the face of the woman who claims to be my best friend. I decide that this isn’t how its going to go down here in public. So, I quickly made the decision to cut through the alley and walk two blocks out of my way to get back to my office. Between the heat wave outside and the fact that I am pissed off by the time I get too my desk I’m glad I have an emergency outfit but wish there was a quick fix for my super curly now frizzed out hair do. I grab my change of cloths and head to the restroom. By the time I have cooled down and don’t feel like I want to punch something I am almost late for a meeting with a very important client. As I was making my walk of shame (yes I can call it that I lost myself for a moment and I am not proud of it) I ran quite literally into a delivery man carrying a very large bouquet of roses. I quickly apologized for nearly knocking the bouquet out of his hands and rushed to my office where my client was already waiting. Just as we sat down to talk about his invention and how I can help him bring his dreams out of the chaos of his mind. The office manager buzzed in to say there was a delivery. I told her I would accept it after my meeting. I was so distracted I ended up being of little help to my client and quite frankly was surprised when he asked for a follow up meeting. Saying that he could tell I wasn’t on my “A” game and would love to revisit the idea soon. I was thankful to say the least. When I read the card attached to the roses I nearly vomited on the spot. Yes, you guessed it they are from “HIM” I mean it is my birthday but what I saw on my lunch break. Well let’s just say I haven’t decided how I want to deal with this. Especially considering there are only a few hours until my “surprise” birthday party lets just see who is surprised. So, I head off the parking garage and go home to get ready for dinner with “HIM”. I spent more than an hour on my hair. Likewise, on my outfit and makeup. When everything is perfect, I bounded down the stairs still without a plan if I’m honest I’m still in shock that in one single moment I lost my two best friends to each other. The next hour is pretty much a blur he picked me up in a limo and as we made our way across town, I pretended everything is fine we even got a little intimate. He took me to our favorite little Italian restaurant for dinner, candlelight, and more roses. When he asks how my meeting went this afternoon I lied and said that we had barely brushed the surface of the potential of this project. While that was partially true I wasn’t about to tell him I almost lost said client due to his shenanigans with her. After dinner we got back in the limo to head to his house. When we got there it didn’t look like anyone was there but I know she has been helping him and she is very crafty. I tried to pick up any sounds any smells anything at all out of place. We held hands from the limo to the door of his very pretentious house surrounded by all the wealth a girl could want in the world. This morning this is what I thought I wanted but witnessing what I did this morning changed my mind on what I want more than anything and that is a man who will love me and never let me down and that is not what “he” is. As we maneuvered through the foyer and into the main house, I began to feel sick to my stomach all this stuff and he’s still a miserable excuse for a human being and so is she. As we walk hand in hand toward the back balcony something begins to feel off. As we step out on to the balcony, he takes a knee and as I stare down into eyes, I once adored I see someone, I never really knew at all. He takes a deep breath and begins to speak just as the entire back yard lights up and all our friends and family are smiling up at us. I let him go through his whole manufactured speech about love and soul mates and fate and destiny and as he reached out for my hand, I jerked it away.

He then looked up at me confused and tried to slap the stupid of his face. The gasp of the crowd below us was palatable and I saw her smile. You see there comes a time in a woman’s when she operates on sheer intuition, I knew I couldn’t trust either of them that’s why I let them spend so much time together. And that’s why I’m sitting outside of a QuikTrip on a hot summer night with a long since forgotten popsicle between my feet.