Toby's Mug

The Toby mug sat dead center on the middle shelf, right at perfect eye level. There was nothing on either side of it. Rachael wanted it that way. She didn't want any distractions when she looked at her special possession. It was the only tangible link with meaning that she had left of her Uncle Erik who had passed away just three months previously. The old Toby mug was his favourite possession, and he often told Rachael about how much it meant to him. Uncle Erik was Rachael's best buddy, she was an only child and didn't have any other relatives to speak of, just a couple of distant ones whom she had never met. Uncle Erik was her mother's older brother and in many ways he had acted like a surrogate father to Rachael after her own father had passed away when she was only six years old. He was always there for them, for his 'little sister' as he liked to call Rachael's mother, even though she was only one year younger than her brother. He had a keen interest for Rachael's wellbeing, and was always there to assist her if she ever needed any kind of help. And now he was gone.

When Rachael and her mother had to clear out his flat after his death, her mother, knowing that Rachael had always gravitated to the Toby mug whenever they were there visiting Erik, told her that she should have it. She said that she knew it would make her brother happy knowing that it went to her. Rachael was pleased to hear her mother say that and had herself been thinking about asking for it and now didn't have to. The mug was an old Royal Dolton piece that had been in the family forever. Erik had always cherished it since he was a little boy. On the bottom of the mug was the word 'Pickwick', along with the other Dolton identifying marks, and Rachael remembered asking her uncle what the word meant. He explained to her that the mug depicted one of the characters from the Charles Dickens book called 'The Pickwick Papers'. Rachael had put the book title on her TBR list but hadn't yet gotten around to reading it. Now she felt she really should read it, since her uncle had always expressed such a fondness for it, and by her reading it she could feel closer to him now that he was no longer with them.

There the mug sat, pride of place on her middle shelf. For the past three months since his passing Rachael would look longingly at it whenever she walked by it and think about all the pleasant memories she had of her uncle. She lived alone in her own small flat that was not far from her mother's place, close enough that they could take their meals together whenever it was convenient. Rachael had a position in the office of a large insurance firm and enjoyed her work. She had recently started dating a new boyfriend and it had made her realize how much she was going to miss no longer having her uncle around to give her his relationship input on things. He was always so level headed, and she knew he had her best interests at heart whatever the matter was about.

The Toby mug was very realistic looking. It was manufactured at a time when Royal Dolton dominated the market for that kind of ceramic item. Her Uncle Erik had been to the factory where all of the Dolton was made and he would enthusiastically tell Rachael how the face painting for the mugs would be done in several stages by different people. Each person had their special skill, with the last and final one being the person who would paint on the eyes. It was this crucial finishing touch that made the faces seem so real, and made the figurines and mugs so appealing to people. They really did appear as if they were real faces looking out at you from beneath their shiny, miniature size. This was why Uncle Erik's mug had always fascinated Rachael since she was a little girl. In those earlier times she could swear that the face on the mug was looking right at her with it's open eyes seeing all. When looking at it now on her shelf it could still spark some of those childhood memories. She could remember a time when the eyes had really frightened her. She had thought then that the eyes were moving and following her around the room. She was just thinking about this memory when she was passing by it on her way into her kitchen. She stopped and smiled to herself about her childhood recollections when all of a sudden it looked like the eyes had just blinked while she was standing right in front of it. What? No, she just imagined it, she thought to herself, it was the same as when she was a little girl. But Rachael still stood there, staring at the mug more intently now and she noticed that her heart was beating faster. I'm being triggered by my old memories, she thought to herself. She remembered back then being so scared one time that she ran to her mother for safety and buried her face in her mother's soft, protective shoulder. Her mother and Uncle Erik had to soothe her and calm her down. She only felt better after her uncle told her that occasionally he felt the same way, that the eyes sometimes could seem like they were moving. He went on to say that the eyes were so real looking that it was easy to think that they were following him around the room. He told her to laugh about it, that was what he did. He said there was nothing to fear, that she should see it all in fun. The friendly face of the Pickwick character wouldn't hurt anyone, he was certain about that. And that's what Rachael did from then on going forward. When it would happen again, she viewed it the same way as her uncle did, with good humour. And that's exactly what she did now, smiling to herself as her heart beat settled down. What a riot, Rachael thought. 'Sure, why not? Follow me around all you like, I know you won't hurt me', she said out loud to the mug as she proceeded back into her kitchen. And the eyes did follow her, at least that's what her sidelong glance told her. This caused her to stop again, and she went back out to the living room and stood in front of the mug and affectionately said to it in jest; 'Are you following me?' After giving it a long close look, she was half hoping that the thing would answer her. After a pause, she turned to resume her duties in the kitchen, and not only did the eyes again appear to be tracking her movement, but this time she was certain that she saw them blink as well. This again stopped Rachael in her tracks, and her heart began to pound involuntarily in her chest. Careful what you ask for. As much as she didn't want to be, she was scared, heart pounding scared. She froze in the entrance to the kitchen and took several deep breaths and told herself to calm down and get a grip. This seemed to help, and gave her the needed courage to inch back out the doorway and stand in front of the mug again. All of her fearful childhood memories about the mug flooded into her at once, flashing like images inside her brain, but something even more noticeable stood out for her; it was the sound of Uncle Erik's voice. It was just loud enough for Rachael to hear, and clear enough for her to understand, as it said, softly and gently; 'calm down Rachael, calm down...it's ok...it's ok, there's nothing to fear here. It's me, your Uncle Erik, I'm using my mug to contact you. Don't panic, everything is alright.'

Rachael at first couldn't figure out whether she was hearing her uncle's voice through her ears, or was it his voice inside her head? The mug's lips never moved, nor did the face move, just the eyes. The eyes were the only part that moved. She decided that it wasn't an actual audible voice that she heard, but rather it was her uncle's voice inside her mind. Was this something that she was creating inside of herself, or was it not? Was she having hallucinations, both audible and visual? She knew enough to know that people can hear voices and see strange things. She thought to herself; 'Is that what was happening to her?' As she stood there, her heart still beating rapidly, she heard her uncle's voice again. This time she confirmed for herself that it wasn't coming from outside of her, but rather it was coming from inside her own head. Alarmed, she again thought; am I losing it? Her uncle's voice replied, 'You're not losing it Rachael. I'm sorry if I've frightened you and made you think that. I was hoping that my reaching out to you wouldn't cause you to react this way, I apologize'. After a pause, he continued; 'look Rachael, maybe this wasn't such a good idea of mine.'

Now Rachael noticed that the mug's eyes were blinking the same way a person's eyes would blink when they were talking, except everything else about the mug's face was motionless, not moving in any way at all. That's enough, thought Rachael, to qualify for a visual hallucination. There's definitely an audio and visual disturbance going on here, I am losing it. 'No, you're not losing it Rachael', her uncle repeated again from reading her thoughts. 'I know what you're thinking, and I know that you're questioning your sanity, please don't, you're fine, there's nothing wrong with you. It's all my fault. I should never have done this, I should have just left well enough alone and passed on like the majority of people do when they die. And I still can do that. I can be gone, completely gone, so you don't have to worry about your mental state, or that your old uncle can follow you around with his Toby mug eyes, and read your mind. I get it, I wouldn't want that. Especially the thought reading part, no thanks, I'd take a pass on that one. But listen Rachael, my time to be able to do this with you is limited. It won't be too long now before my complete passing on takes place.' There was a pause as Rachael was trying to process everything that was happening, then her Uncle Erik spoke again, this time in an apologetic tone; 'Look Rachael, I can leave now, I have the option to return to this waiting room realm that I had found myself in when I left this earth. It's only because of my deep love for your mother and you that I was able to bring about this temporary visit. A strong enough love can do that, at least for a short while. I can see that this has made you somewhat confused and a little worried as well. I understand, I don't blame you, I would be too if the same thing had happened to me when I was still alive. Rachael, you know I love you, please tell your mother, my dear sister, that I love her as well. Or, don't say anything if you don't want to talk about this to anyone. She already knows how much I care for her, so on second thought, it's probably better not to tell anybody about my visit. People may question your mental state and we don't want that. There's nothing wrong with you. This kind of thing happens to other people as well. I'm not the only one with a love that was strong enough to enable me to temporarily leave the passing on realm I was in.'

Rachael still can't quite believe that any of this is really happening to her. The voice is without question that of her uncle, everything about it is the same as his voice, and the eyes on the mug have been opening and closing in time to that voice. Is this real? She thinks to herself. 'Yes, it's real, her uncle replies, I'm sorry for the mind reading, I can't help but know it. Rachael, I'm going to leave now and let you have everything back to normal. It was nice to talk to you one last time. You know I will always keep you in my heart. All the best to you my dearest.'

Rachael blurts out; 'Don't go, Uncle Erik, don't go!' She stares intently into the face on the mug, but can see that the eyes now look like eyes which have been painted on a piece of pottery. They no longer looked like they were real, or that they could ever seem to move. They were frozen in place. They were back to being the original open eyes of Toby's mug.

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