Let's Just Talk

‘This my favorite song.’ He whispered. ‘It makes me feel less alone, you know? Like I am not the only one who feels this way…’

She could only smile and nod in response. Isn’t that exactly how he made her feel? Less alone?

Then he played the song and she just forgot. She forgot about the fact that they were stuck in traffic on a rainy day. She forgot about the screeching of the windshield wipers going back and forth, back and forth. She forgot about the cars honking impatiently all around her. She forgot about the angry drivers cussing at one another. For those three minutes, it was just him and her in their own little world.

It was magical. And like most magical things, the moment was fleeting.

‘That was Angeles by Elloitt Smith, have you listened to his music?’

‘Never heard of him.’ She replied, making a mental note to google it later. He had a very good taste in music. Not juvenile and loud, very… classic.

‘Did you like the song?’ He asked hesitantly, his voice huskier than usual.

‘Yes.’ She replied and meant it. He just nodded. She suspected there was a backstory behind why he liked the song so much if he wanted to whole city’s validation. She also suspected he had drunk something cold in this chilly monsoon if his voice sounded so hoarse today. She couldn’t help but fret about his health. He could be so careless sometimes.

‘What else…’ He started.

He was stalling today, like he had run out of things to talk to her about. They only had an hour to talk everyday anyway, he couldn’t have possibly gotten bored already. She couldn’t help but feel a little hurt. She had been looking forward to this part of her day everyday for the past one and a half years.

‘As you probably know by now, I-’ There was a sudden knock on her car window. She saw an angry bald man waiting with his hands on his chubby waist. She slowly rolled the window down, rotating the squeaky old fashioned lever.

‘Hey crazy lady!’ The man screamed at her face, particles of spittle flying out. ‘Can you move? Some of us here have lives. People have been honking at your car for the past 5 minutes. Jesus Christ.’

‘Sorry.’ She muttered softly. She realized that she had gotten so immersed in their conversation that she didn’t see the cars move ahead of her. She felt bad for holding back the traffic. The people out there probably had pressing matters to tend to, unlike her. How foolish.

‘I can’t think of anything else when I’m with you.’ She confessed to him, looking out the window. He didn’t reply. He never did to such statements.

‘I watched a TV show recently called “Fleabag” and that was the most fun I’ve had the whole month.’ He was lying. He had attended the 21st birthday party of the daughter of this huge media tycoon and it was a blast. She had seen his Instagram posts, commented on them too.

‘-and it is about this amazing, hilarious woman and in parts of the show she talks to the audience, breaking the fourth wall. In those moments we feel like we are actually there with her, know her personally. What the hell, I was so attached to Phoebe Waller Bridge by the end of the show.’

She didn’t say anything back to response but was listening keenly. She loved listening to him just talk about all the things under the sun. Her eyes were glued outside the window, looking into the car parallel to hers. It was a shiny white Tesla. It had a young family, with the beautiful mom behind the wheels and the dutiful dad changing the diaper of their baby, smiling and scrunching up his nose in mock disgust while the baby giggled happily. The mother tickled her baby’s thighs making him giggle even more. Something about that family made her angry, so she looked away quickly.

‘The weather is so bad today.’ He said sighing dramatically and she couldn’t help but agree.

‘It is terrible. I hate the rain.’ She said. ‘It makes me feel so blue. There is something about it, I don’t know what.’

‘- and I personally don’t understand the need to romanticize rain so much. In music, in movies, everywhere. It is just not that great!’ He exclaimed making her laugh. They both were so similar that it scared her sometimes. But most of the time it just made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside, like she had someone in her life who actually understood her.

She really liked him. He didn’t know it and probably never will. But that was fine. Some loves aren’t meant to be reciprocated. She had come to understand and accept that.

‘I totally agree. Rain is gross and wet and a problem in most scenarios.’ She said resting her face in her wrinkled hand.

The traffic wasn’t making much progress. At this rate she was going to reach home only at 10:30 pm. And that was the best case scenario. This meant that he would leave her mid journey. She looked at her watch, it read 9:50 pm.

It was any minute now.

‘Okay guys.’ He said and she sighed. Here we go. ‘My time is up for today. I hope I kept all of you who are stuck in traffic at least moderately entertained.’ He paused to laugh, she didn't. ‘Talk to you guys tomorrow at the same time. Be sure to tune in to my show “Let’s Just Talk” on Indigo FM. Until then, it is R.J Mickey signing off. Bye, byee!’

And then he was gone, leaving her all alone in her ugly second hand Toyota. She missed him the very second he left, her only consolation being the fact that he would be back the next day. She leaned forward to turn off the radio. Then it was only the clamor of Delhi, taunting her, laughing at her pathetic existence.