Artificial Anxiety of an Artificial Person

Blinking, though having little use for it, Gina watched the neon sign buzzed and blinked incessantly in the night. Its searing pink reflected off the wet pavement to illuminate the caliginous streets, rain lit by moon and neon light still falling and pooling in the dips and creases of the road. She reached a hand out from under the protection of her umbrella and watched how the drops slid off her slick synthetic skin. Though the watery steps were heard splashing against the walk behind her, the brunette still startled when one of the sets of footsteps called out to her.

“Gina!” The voice was familiar and she stood at attention and turned to see her work companion Jonas, “sorry we’re late.” He smiled and she found that the fluorescent of the bar sign illuminated his dark skin beautifully, his energized and gleaming appearance appearing all the brighter with his big sea blue umbrella stretched above his dreads to keep dry in the poor weather conditions.

“Oh. It’s okay! I didn’t wait long. She gave her own polite smile, careful for her tone not to sound quite so stilted and professional as she had in the office. This was the first time she had been invited to an after work outing after all, even if it were only a small one.

Trailing behind Jonas with raven hair pouring over her shoulders and milky complexion lit up by the screen of the phone she stared into was their other coworker Diana. With a clear-topped umbrella clutched in her other hand, she stopped just short of bumping into the male and said nothing but peered up from her screen just long enough to give a sneer in Gina’s direction then casting her gaze back down. “Don’t mind her,” Jonas reassured, patting the android on the shoulder, though it was hard not to pay the rude young woman any mind. Frankly, Gina wasn’t sure if she would have come if she knew Diana would be here, and she imagined Diana thought much of the same. “Well let’s not just stand around in the rain all night,” Jonas motioned the girls to come along into the bar.

When the trio stepped inside they shook off their umbrellas and left them at the door, Gina allowed her eyes to shift about the establishment in a scanning motion only to find she was the only android to be found. Given that fact, she hoped her otherness wasn’t too noticeable and had hidden the covered ports in the back of her neck under her green striped scarf. Diana was sign enough that there were plenty of people who didn’t accept androids in their society, she was sure it would be a long while until then. Jonas split off from the two saying he would get some drinks and they had barely taken their place at a table when Diana piped up in a dull tone, “can you even drink.” It lacked the inflection of a question. “Well yes, I just can’t become intoxicated.” Gina informed, shifting uncomfortably under Diana’s disaffected gaze and scooting her chair closer into the table. She stared into Jonas’ back as he stood at the bar, wishing he hadn’t left her along with Diana.

“You know this is a bunch of bullshit, right.”

“Pardon?” Gina tore her eyes from Jonas and back to the dark haired woman. “Our company claimed you as an acquired asset, an object they own, but you still get paid a living wage higher than the factory workers who have to build you hunks of junk.” Her deep black eyes stared daggers into Gina and made her sink down in her seat, becoming all the more aware of the growing number of mortal eyes on her. “I am sorry, but that is not my fault,” she shrunk into herself, resorting to a more formal speech pattern in her fear. A thick silence formed between them, the cluttered noise of the bar around them only making it grow thicker in contrast.

Finally Gina found respite in the whistled tune of Jonas’ return, three bottles of beer in hand. The glass bottles were placed on the table with a satisfying clink. “Miss anything interesting?” He looked between them with an easy smile, one that only faltered when he took in the energy of the table and Gina awkwardly dragged her bottle across the table to cradle it in her spindly interlocked fingers. Diana didn’t say anything when she snatched up her drink but nearly choked on it when Gina murmured. “Just how I am not a person,” she stared into the neck of her bottle and Jonas stared at her. “Of course you’re a person- Diana!” His head snapped to face the other girl, finding her now squinting at the brunette bot. “What’s your problem?” His nose crinkled in distaste and Diana gave her own look as if it were obvious.

“You’re the one who wanted to bring the fucking robot for a fun night out,” she put quotes in the air for fun night out. “We’re having fun, right Gina?” People were definitely staring at them now, especially as Jonas and Diana began to argue over the rights of android civilians and its relation to the slavery and oppression of African Americans back from the 16th century to even the 21st. The stares shot from Gina to him and back to her.

“It’s not the same, Jonas, you’re an actual person, your ancestors were actual people- that’s not!” Diana was pointing across the table at Gina with a particular venom in her words. This was not a fine not, Gina decided. Jonas gave a “well she can think and feel, can’t she?” Only to get a “I don’t know, can it?” From Diana in reply before Gina excused herself, standing abruptly to hurry away to the bathrooms.

She would find the standard gendered bathrooms, recalling some places had separate bathrooms for androids, though they were often nothing more than a broom closet. There was nothing of the sort here and she fidgeted with her hair, grumbling to herself and looking around then shoving open the door to the ladies room.

It wasn’t that she had to use the bathroom, but desperately needed to escape. Leaning with her palms pressed to the counter that housed the sinks, Gina stared into the mirror and gave herself a moment to calm down. The tech that emulated the tarsal glands of her eyes blinked with the dull blue glow of her fighting the artificial biology of her tear ducts.

She waited there a few minutes before taking a deep breath and wandering back out to the table where now only Jonas sat. “Hey Gina, sorry about all that.” There was a weak smile on his lips and she shook her head, not yet taking her seat again, “no, I am sorry for causing trouble-” “Being a person who deserves the same rights as everyone else isn’t anything you have to apologize for.” Jonas cut her off but his words brought a solace to her and she quietly sat back down with him. There were a few lingering eyes on them, drifting over occasionally to see if there would be any new outbursts from their table, fortunately there wouldn’t be.

“We can still enjoy the night together, no need to worry,” his smile was brighter this time and Gina let her shoulders relax, smiling in return. “You’re right Jonas, thank you.”