Tea for Three

Checking the day’s schedule, Maude looked forward to meeting her first-time client, Silesia. Her daily prep included the wide variety of tea blends sufficient to the day’s demands.

Maude called her social events ‘Pours.’ Modeled after the traditional Japanese tea ceremony, she aimed deeper than mere tranquility. Her delicious, blended teas reoriented her client’s views of themselves and the world. She tailored each concoction individually by adding herbs and essential oils. Every ingredient was organic and non-toxic.

Of course, it was all legal. Maude acquired her skills by studying under a Peruvian shaman for a decade.

Her second scheduled client called himself Ted, not his real name. Maude hadn’t met him, but she knew him well. A columnist at the local newspaper, he was her most strident critic. Maude intended to reorient Ted’s views good and hard.  

Ted and other critics claimed Maude ran a cult.

She scoffed at such descriptions. “They’ve obviously never attended my tea parties. Clients choose to return. They’re not compelled.”

She maintained a low public profile. Finding self-promotion distasteful, Maude didn’t advertise. She didn’t need to. Word of mouth brought most of her clients seeking relief from a life out of balance. They generally left happy.

Critics wondered why no one in city hall cared to lift her veil of secrecy. Maude dismissed rumors claiming she was a close confidant of politicians and society mavens.

Maude admitted to modifying the tea ceremony into something unique. Her Pours were for anyone seeking to rebalance. The Pours logo was a modified yin yang symbol depicted as floating within the bowl of a bamboo spoon.

She didn’t tell fortunes, wasn’t a guru and didn’t run a séance. Nor was she a matchmaker, though some had found love after meeting through her. That was serendipity at play, not Maude.

Maude also adamantly rejected the term ‘therapist.’ She firmly rejected suggestions her Pours were a form of group therapy. She abhorred insinuations that she practiced without a license.

As the appointed time for this day’s Pour approached, Maude prepared a special tea for Ted. Not knowing Silesia’s needs and temperament, she waited. Her standard blends would do until she knew more.

Maude resisted temptation regarding Ted. Poison was an option to which she refused to stoop. But she had prepared something special for him. Maude was confident that when Ted left the Pour, his attitude would be radically different from the one he brought.

With a few minutes before the Pour, Maude sat in silence with her hands folded.

The bell rang. Maude opened the door to Silesia, wearing a short, strapless sundress and a broad-brimmed straw hat.

Silesia thrust out her hand. “Maude?”

“Yes. Welcome to my Pour.”

Maude waved her in and saw Ted coming up the walk in a suit and tie. She introduced herself and led them to the dedicated Pour room.

Silesia talked rapidly. “It’s such a beautiful day. Perfect for a little tea, don’t you think?”

Maude nodded. Ted lagged behind, taking note of the decor and the layout of the house.

Silesia continued without pausing for breath. “But it’s so beautiful. A shame to spend it cooped up inside. I love going down to the river walk and watching the ducks and the boats and the birds flying overhead. The trees make such lovely shade. And each fluttering leaf responds to every slight breeze. Is there any way we can reschedule? I hate to waste the day inside…”

Once in the room, Maude indicated where they should sit. “Well, you’re here now. We won’t be all day…”

Bright and shadowless, the Pour room had no windows. No pictures adorned the walls which had climbing vines painted on them. A Ficus tree stood in one corner. A low table sat amidst plush pillows. A table beside Maude had a gas fire, tea pots, space for preparation and teacups.

Silesia and Ted did a little dance trying to decide who should sit where.

Maude pointed and said, “No… Silesia there… Ted, please sit here.”

They sat. Silesia giggled like a little girl. Ted’s face shifted between annoyance and boredom.  

Maude prepared the tea with bamboo utensils and served them each a cup.

She said, “This first cup should relax you. Take a moment to enjoy. Sip carefully. It’s hot.”

Silesia downed the cup in one gulp and screamed as she spit it out. She grabbed a napkin and wiped tea off herself and the table. “Wow! Sorry! That was hot!”

Ted rolled his eyes.

The first serving of tea was intended to break the ice. Maude never wanted clients to think of their Pour experience as akin to riding in an elevator. They were past that.

Whatever their stated purpose, Maude sensed subtle emotional currents at work. Her blends worked to rebalance each person regardless their emotional state.

Wanting the tea to bring everyone into a state of calm, she poured them another cup.

She leaned toward Silesia. “Are you okay? It’s hot.”

“Hot. Right. Got the message.” Silesia blew on the cup and sipped. “Oh… this is good…”

Maude turned to Ted. “And how are you, Ted?”

Startled from his reverie, Ted took a moment. He reined in his disdain for what he thought an elaborate charade. “This is different from the expected traditional tea ceremony.”

“Oh, what have you heard? I never tell people to expect that.”

“Well, to start…” He pointed at Silesia. “This badly dressed, classless woman is rude. Won’t stop talking. Doesn’t carry a fan…”

Silesia scowled and rummaged through her purse. Pulling out a battery-operated fan, she switched it on. The little propeller spun, blowing strands of her hair back. With eyes fluttering, she smiled at the breeze in her face. Giggling, she aimed it at Ted. 

Blocking the draft with his hands, he said, “Never mind! Turn it off. Keep it to yourself.”

Silesia winked at Maude and giggling, returned the fan to her purse.

Ted said, “So much for tranquility. This is my point. How do you dare pretend this tattered façade is a tea ceremony? You exhibit only the shallowest grasp of time-honored rituals. This is just a load of frayed, new age claptrap hiding behind the trappings of a traditional tea ceremony.”

“I’m sorry. My Pours have been misrepresented. Would you like more tea?”

“I mean, where’s the respect, the purity, and the reverence?”

Maude held her look. After a moment, he held his cup out. He wouldn’t let go when Maude tried to take it. Careful not to burn him, she refilled his cup.

“It’s hot…”

“I know…” He gave Silesia a stern look and brushed off his leg.

Maude noticed that Silesia had begun to fidget. She declined more tea.

“Silesia, tell us what brings you here?”

She sighed. “It’s all about my roommates. They aren’t pets.”

“But they’re…?”

“Hamsters. Well, about six months ago, I was feeling lonely in my beautiful, spacious apartment. So, I bought a couple of friends. Hate to have to ‘buy’ a friend. Seems so entitled. But can’t exactly meet a hamster at the local club…”

Maude nodded.

Ted rolled his eyes. He whispered, “Can’t you shut her up?”

“Everything was cool for a while. We got on famously. But then one day I came home and discovered an extra dozen of the little critters. Who knew?”

“All in one cage?”

Appalled, Silesia practically shouted. “Oh, no. I would never cage my friends. What do you take me for?”

Agitated, Ted said, “But…”

“’But’ is right. That was only the beginning. I’ve lost count… And that isn’t even the worst part…”

Neither Maude nor Ted wanted to hear the worst.

“…I discovered that they ate one of them!”

Maude nodded impassively. “Yes, but…”

“But nothing. I admit I’m not that bothered that his family ate their baby brother. I mean, get real. Babies do get eaten… but poor Little Jimmy… I’ll never forget when I found…”

“Little Jimmy was the hamster?”

Silesia looked at Ted like he was a lunatic.

“Focus, Ted. The circle of life and all that… I miss him… And…”

Maude said, “Yes…?”

“I cannot get over…” She dabbed her eyes with a napkin.

Maude and Ted leaned in.

“…After everything I did… just can’t believe… that they ate meat.”

Ted feigned a coughing fit to cover his laughter. Silesia waited for it to subside.

“I mean, what did I do wrong? How could they? Didn’t I raise them right? You know, to be vegetarian? I thought they were… I didn’t skimp…”

In sympathy, Maude touched Silesia’s right hand. She covered Maude’s with her left. Maude placed her free hand on top of Silesia’s. Misty eyed, they turned to Ted.

He said, “Looks like you’re first at bat, Maude.” They didn’t understand. He said, “So, is this it? Sorry but I have to get on with my day.”

Maude straightened up.

“No, Ted. Now that we’re in synch with each other, I’ll serve another tea. One made for you alone.”

“A special tea? Just for me? Oh, boy…”

Maude resisted trying to kill Ted. She wouldn’t poison him, at least not in the usual way. ‘But I’m not about to let this hack destroy everything I’ve built.’ She wanted Ted’s comeuppance, not his life. This potion would ‘take his words.’ Silence him. At least for a few days.

He said, “So what’s in this special tea? Hold the cyanide…” Only he laughed.

Maude said, “I can’t reveal my secret recipe. But it contains a mixture of Frankincense, Sandalwood, Ylang Ylang, Rose, Pepperm… I could go on… You get the idea.

Ted and Silesia were awed at the complexities of Maude’s preparations.

“And Silesia, don’t feel left out. I’ve also designed a special blend for you.”

They sat expectantly. Maude poured Ted’s tea from a pot she’d set aside and handed him the small porcelain cup. He reached out but stopped. Putting his hand up, he shook his head.

“No thanks, the cup is chipped. I’ll pass.”

Maude recovered. “You don’t understand, Ted. It’s not a chip. Only an irregularity in the glaze. These rare cups are highly prized… eagerly sought for.”

Ted couldn’t care less. Silesia watched, fascinated.

Maude continued. “You’ve heard of the Japanese tradition of mending a broken bowl with a vein of gold lining the crack? This is similar…”

Silesia said, “Oh, don’t waste it. Give it to me.” She reached out.

“But it wasn’t made for you. It’s Ted’s.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll manage. It sounds delicious.”

This had never happened before. And this tea was pivotal to Maude’s plan.

She said, “If you insist.”

Ted said, “We all do.”

Silesia took Ted’s cup, sipped and smiled. Beginning to speak, she stopped and could only say, “More?”

Not used to losing control, Maude refreshed Silesia’s cup.

Ted smiled at Silesia. “Ah, Miss… the power of the well-chosen word…”

Silesia nodded but could say nothing.

Ted turned to Maude and said, “Good. You shut her up. At last. I’ll have some too...”

Maude said, “Yes! You need something. I can’t have you go thirsty.”

Deftly switching pots, she poured him a cup of calming tea. They each smiled as he took the cup. He raised it in a mock toast and sipped.

“Wow! That’s delicious!” He loosened his tie. “Maybe you sensed this, Maude, with your acute observational powers. I need to tell you... I write a column at the paper. Commentary… reviews… you know, opinions on the world at large…” He leaned forward and took Maude’s hand. “I am happy to say, you’ve earned yourself a glowing review.”

Maude replied, “Ted… you? A writer? I had no idea.”

She refilled his cup with tea promoting a positive attitude.

‘Go with the flow,’ she thought.

Silesia remained silent. Ted waxed poetic. Tranquility reigned.