Passing By Carol Coupland

The road was windy and nestled on either side by cliffs, which made it gloomy, even in daylight. A light sprinkle of snow was all that could be seen on the main stretch of road, but Tina knew the snowplough would never be able to get down to the track that led to the cabin. She drove for another mile and then saw the heavy laden snow ahead. She remembered how Lewis used to tell her to be careful and always take the safe way out as it was easier in the end. Tina stopped the car abruptly and then thought of what Lewis would say if he were watching her. He would lightly chide her and then give that twinkle of a smile to her. A tear fell from her cheek.

Tina got out of the car, but the wind insisted on slamming the car door shut. With her beanie pulled down hard over her ears she noticed the windchill factor was much lower than she had realised. Tina wished now that she had worn her thermals, but thought at the last moment that it was silly. It wasn’t as if she was going to be up here long at the cabin. She trudged the last half a mile through the snow, which was nearly up to her knees. She was grateful for the knee length boots. All she needed now was to gather her thoughts and recite the speech she would make on Lewis’s behalf. She only hoped that he would be proud of her.

As she entered the cabin a wave of emotion swept over her and she realised she had not cried since she had heard the news. She let out a yell and was grateful that no one would be able to hear her. At least she hoped no one was walking around in this weather. It had always been a perfectly peaceful and happy place where there had been such fond memories. They had gone to the cabin for a few days every summer, and when the children were young they had taught them how to fish and have fun without a mobile or XBOX to play on. They had learned the to enjoy the simple pleasures of board games and cards. Tina picked up a few things that they always left behind such as a lighter, a pack of cards and a book. There was a photo. Why had Lewis left a photo of the two of them? Tina fingered the corner of his mouth and traced around his face. She then lightly kissed his lips as if he was there in the room.

Her moment of reflection and peace was disturbed by the gentle purring sound of a motor car turning into the area where she had parked. It was a BMW. It was Sheree and her obnoxious husband Tony. The great man of the Stock Exchange who made so many million in one quarter but couldn’t be bothered to give to those who wanted to go further, but didn’t have those lucky breaks like Tony. The good thing about Tony was you didn’t really get to see him much, but Sheree was an amazing friend from high school days. She had stuck by Tina through thick and thin. If it wasn’t for Sheree Tina wasn’t sure how she would have coped in the last few years.

Sheree had walked ahead leaving Tony to make the ‘Calls and Puts’ for his clients.

‘Can’t you just leave it for a few minutes Tony? On today of all days. You lousy swine.’

The moment Sheree stepped in and saw Tina she transformed into the caring person who was always there for others, but never told anyone of the battles she was suffering herself. She knew she was having health issues with being overweight, but when your husband constantly told you that you were too thin, she had decided to fatten up. Now Tony didn’t seem to care.

Sheree put her arms around Tina and shared grief as only women know how. With the unsaid words of grief they knew the would always be there for one another. Tina had said how the girls were flying back to be here tomorrow and that her son would be there also. Even though they lived in different countries they were always a family. It was something Sheree was acutely aware of, that something that was lacking in their house. There was no family in the sense of mom and dad, but more of husband, wife and children at boarding school. Then there was summer school and a day or two at home. No real interaction. Would they be better at a local school than a private school? It was hard to say, but Sheree knew she had no say in those matters. It was money that talked and that mattered to Tony along with image.

‘Well you finally arrived,’ Sheree looked at Tony expecting he would for once show some heart and say some words of condolence.

Tony ignored Sheree and instead walked around the cabin starting to make an assessment of things.

‘This cabin wouldn’t fetch much on the open market, but I know someone who . . .’

‘Shut your mouth.’

‘I’m not talking to you Sheree.’

‘Your wife is right. Shut your mouth.’ Tina’s voice was calm and strong.

She was not going to b pushed around by him. She wasn’t sure where she got the strength from, but she was glad of it right then. It was the sort of thing that Lewis would have said.

‘Sheree will you stay at my place tonight. I just need to talk to someone.’

‘Sure thing honey.’

’What I meant was I can . . .’

‘I suggest you leave Tony. I am in no mood to put up with rudeness from anyone.’

Tony stormed out and went over to the BMW. He slammed the door and pulled out quickly before Tina and Sheree were halfway across the snow to Tina’s car.

‘I don’t know how you put up with him Sheree. It’s not right the way he speaks to you. And I’m sorry for speaking this way, but this, well it probably sounds strange, its just it seems like Lewis is here and telling me what to do. I can feel his presence. Do you know what I mean?’

‘Yeah honey. I felt it in that cabin. That man of yours had soul. You know you were right to speak to Tony the way you did. I’m proud of you. I wish I had the backbone to do the same.’

Tina let it slide. She had more pressing things to concentrate on. There was the arrival of the children and grandchildren. The eulogy, which she was hoping her son would help out with. It had all been planned out well in advance by Lewis.

He didn’t have that much time and he wanted to make things easy on Tina. He was looking at Tina. She was so beautiful even when she was sad. He looked down at his clothes and wondered why he had stains on them. Someone walked into the room and started to dress him. He was going to look clean and tidy for the first time in a while. He hoped that they would comb his hair the right way; what was left of it. They were so kind to him.

‘You’ll have to wait Lewis. The portal is not open yet. Just kick around and comfort Tina. She can’t see you, but you will be able to stay near her. Give us twenty-four hours to sort it out.’

‘Who are you,’ yelled out Lewis.

‘There’s no need to yell. We can all hear up here. When you are through the portal you will see us. It’s a lovely place for lovely people, just like you. Now go and see Tina.’’

‘Am I really . . . ’

‘Yes,’ came a choir of voices.

Lewis followed Tina around. He checked that there were boxes of tissues for her. She had certainly gone through a lot and he suggested out loud where things were. Tina found things that she hadn’t seen for a while. Sheree was a comfort and Lewis was glad that Tony wasn’t in the house drinking his best whiskey. Not that Lewis ever drank much. It was more for medicinal purposes when he couldn’t sleep after his chest was wheezy. He felt terrific now.

Tina, Sheree and the families were organising who was travelling in which car. Lewis walked along to keep Tina company. He played snow fairies as they discussed where each person was sitting. Lewis looked at the snow he was on. There were no footprints. There was no shape to the snow fairies.

‘I really am dead,’ he thought. Lewis suddenly realised he better get back to his body.

He wasn’t displeased to see Tony hadn’t turned up to his funeral, but he knew that Sheree would be disappointed he had let her down again.

‘You should ditch him Sheree. He’s no good for you. You can do it. I hope you can hear me.’

As everyone sat down to reminisce about Lewis and the great times they had, Sheree fell silent. She decided to get a divorce. She wasn’t sure where her courage had come from, but it was time to call it quits. He had never loved her. Only her family money.

‘Good on you Sheree,’ said Lewis. Sheree smiled.

Lying at the bottom of a cliff was a crumpled BMW.

’Lewis, you can come up now,’ called a voice from somewhere above.