The Fisherman

I woke up this morning with an awful headache. My neck and temple were throbbing. I stumbled down the stairs and into the kitchen. I stuck my head under the sinks faucet. The water, so cold, so nice. Ah. I opened my medicine cabinet and swallowed an ibuprofen. That should help. I then proceeded to make myself a cup of coffee which also helped with my headache.

I went out on my deck with my coffee and embraced the morning sunshine, it truly was going to be a beautiful day. The sky was clear, the river was glass, almost too fragile to touch but it was absolutely mesmerizing. It would've been a perfect day to go sailing. I sat there for what felt like hours, just taking in my surroundings. The birds and the occasional seagull flying over, the geese shitting over my yard and the fisherman's boat that would drive by disrupting the peace every so often.

A gust of wind passed by that made me uneasy because it smelled just like him. A tear drizzled down my face into my mouth. Salty. I shouldn't let his memory bother me, but reminders of him always seem to be coming up; especially when I'm happy. Maybe he was the seagull in the sky, passing by to say hello. It didn't matter though, he is gone and I'm trying to move on. I just wish I had closure. But, it's okay, this is life, I always tell myself that. No matter what I can't go back in time, as much as I wish I could.

I went back to the kitchen to pour myself another cup, when out of the corner of my eye I saw someone staring at me through a window. Fuck. I couldn't tell who it was I tried to make it seem like I didn't see them, but my curiosity gave in. I slowly turned in the direction of the window and holy shit there he was. Everything in my body went down, like I was on top of a building and was pushed. We stared at each other for a moment. He didn't move, just smiled. I smiled back. Why was he here? And how was he here? I must be losing my mind, there's no way he is here right now. You need to get it together.

I opened my door, and as soon as I did the sky turned grey and rain began to pour. I called for him, but he was no longer there. What the hell? I closed my door, turned around and there he was, again. How did he do that? I went towards him, and every time I took a step the thunder rolled outside. What is going on? I asked. He simply just stood there. The rain continued to pour. I asked again. Nothing. I yelled this time with tears rushing down my face. Nothing. I ran to him, the thunder even louder with each step. I was face to face with the best and worst thing that had ever happened to me. I'm sorry. He said. I didn't want to leave you, ever. You know I always loved you and I still do. I didn't want our story to end this way but it did and it's all my fault. I want you to live, I want you to be safe and move on from me. Can you do that? Why are you putting yourself in such danger?

What do you mean danger? I'm the one that tried to save you, don't you remember. You were unhappy, you didn't want to be here anymore! You hated every second of your life. You did this all of it! You never told me how much pain you were in. You never even tried to ask my help. And here you are again? For what? To make me feel what you did? Well I'm sorry but that is not going to happen.

I know. I am sorry. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I told you how I was feeling.

I stared at him for a moment. But, I love you too even through everything that happened, but I need to move on and you just keep showing up. I said this as I reached my hand to touch his face. As soon as I did lightning struck his face and my hand and suddenly I couldn't breathe, I blacked out.

Beep. Beep. Beep. I opened my eyes and there was a women with a mask looking over top of me. She's awake. I heard her say. Where was I? My head was throbbing, my vision was blurry, I couldn't feel my fingers.

Where am I?

Mam, you are at the Beaufort County Medical Hospital. Can you please tell me your name?

What?

You were in a coma. I don't want to scare you. But please tell me your name.

Gael Hayes. What... what happened to me?

You were sailing out on the sound. A huge storm must've come out of nowhere. Your boat was struck by lightning. A local fisherman found you unconscious on the deck while your boat was sinking. He called the Coast Guard saying you needed medical attention immediately It's a miracle you're alive. Someone must really love you up there.

He saved me. I was going to die out there.

God does make spectacular things happen you were lucky that fisherman was out there. Relax and get some rest, you have endured severe blunt force trauma on your head and your right arm and leg. We're happy to see that you are alive.

I touched him with my right arm. I thought to myself. Was I actually at home when I saw him or was that all a dream I had in my coma? I remember going out on the boat last week for a cruise, it was a clear beautiful day, the birds were singing, the water was flat as glass. There wasn't going to be a storm that day, I always make sure of it. I guess it came out of nowhere, just like he did.

All I know is that he saved me. And I tried to save him, but I couldn't. But he saved me, I think that's all the closure I will ever need. He was the fisherman that saved me.