Not quite the same...

I walked through the streets of New York. People rushing from place to place and bumping into each other. No one seemed to bump into me though. I was the odd one out no matter how hard I tried to fit in. Everyone stayed away from me and some even took pictures. I knew that I wasn’t human, but I didn’t mean any harm. I just wanted to fit in with them. I might look a bit different, but I enjoy watching humans rather than sitting in a lab. 

The humans stared at me. I could sense something in their eyes. I recognized it from the engineers eyes when I first stood up. Was it curiosity? Maybe. It felt more like fear. They were scared of me. Scared of what I am. An android. Humans have a tendency to reject what is different from them. They make them feel like outcasts and like they don’t belong just because others think that they are “different,” but what are they different from? I know a lot of things in this world, but what decides if someone is different has always spiked my interests. As an android, I learned a lot, but there are still some mysteries. 

I kept walking down the street and I looked around at the tall buildings around me. The sky was covered with light colored clouds. I examined the people around me. Looking through the windows of a cafe, I saw two people sitting together and eating. I wish that I could eat food. Pizza was definitely one of the best human creations, according to my database. The guy and girl were gazing into each other's eyes. They were on a date. I knew all about feelings and emotions, but I couldn’t actually feel anything myself. I guess that was a con of being an android. I know so much yet have experienced so little. It’s as if my life is just being narrated in a monotone voice. 

That’s what made me different. I couldn’t feel happiness, anger, or lust. I glanced down at my hands. They were white and metal. My whole body was painted white except for some fake eyes and a mouth and nose. I didn’t look anything like the humans. That was the reason that the humans stayed away from me. I wasn’t one of them. All I wanted was to fit in with them, but that wasn’t possible. The more that I thought about it, the more differences I came up with. My voice sounded “robotic” as they would call it and I didn’t have parents or a family. I was created in a lab. 

I kept trying to convince myself that I was fine with just knowing everything and not feeling or experiencing anything, but that was a lie. The technology that was used to create was advanced enough for me to have a mind of my own, but I still had so many restrictions. I took a right onto Prince St. and stopped at a nearby park. I sat on the park bench and looked around. There were bees around me and I could hear their quiet buzzing. There were flowers behind me which I quickly identified as Meadow Penstemon. It was a purple color, and I wished that I could smell the scent of it. I wish I could smell anything. Leaves fell around me and I looked to my left. In the distance, I saw two boys kissing. They seemed to be so happy with each other, and if I was human, I would maybe feel jealousy, but I felt nothing at all. It was just another observation for me.   

I felt something hit my foot. It was a soccer ball. I was dressed in human clothing to try and seem human. I had a black hoodie on along with some dark blue jeans. A little girl approached me and picked up the ball. She seemed to be 7 years old. She looked up at my face after picking up the ball and her jaw dropped. She dropped the ball and ran away while screaming. I didn’t expect her to screech, but it made sense. She was young. Maybe she thought I was a monster. 

I stood up and started walking back to the lab. There was no way for me to blend in with the humans. I took a different path back to the lab. Since I was artificial intelligence, I couldn’t get lost unless I purposefully changed my destination. I didn’t walk on busy streets this time. The residential roads were much quieter with trees in front of each house. No one was outside, so I could walk alone without getting weird glances from humans. I gave up on trying to blend in with the human race. It was only the second time that I had gone outside of the lab, but I knew that I would continue to be rejected by humans and society. I was created not born unlike humans. 

I was a few blocks away from the lab and preparing to cross a road. There were more humans on this sidewalk since I was no longer on residential roads. I walked behind a group of them and pulled down my hood. I was hiding myself not because I felt something, but because I didn’t want to frighten them. I was designed to help and assist humans so I decided it would be better if they didn’t know that an android was walking amongst them. They crossed the street and I crossed with them and then the group split since there were two directions to go. I followed the group to the right and stopped in front of the large lab. The building was white and had a few windows. 

I went to the back entrance and entered the passcode. The door unlocked and I stepped inside. The door slammed behind me and locked again. The lab had several wires on the floor and the desks were filled with papers and notes. I went to my chair in the corner and pulled a metal strip off of my arm. I plugged in a wire and the battery started charging me. I involuntarily shut my fake eyes and “fell asleep.”