Little secrets or little white lies

Shhhh… I have a secret to tell.  I admit it. I love to tell secrets. My mother used to tell me that my secrets are considered little white lies. So I swore to her that I would always tell her the truth. But life doesn’t always go the way we plan it and when I turned 19 (the age of you can’t tell me what to do antmore) my promise literally went out the window.

It was a cold night in January when I met Richard. I was playing a mystery game on my computer, when a massage popped up on the screen in the chat room. I thought it was from another gamester who wanted to challenge me. So I opened up the message only to learn that the message was from someone who was new to the game and wanted some help playing.

We chatted for over two hours, during which time we learned alot about each other. He had a great personality and his photo, which came along with his name depicted a dark handsome fellow of latin extinct.

We spoke every night and before I knew it, I felt like I wanted to meet him and spend the rest of my life with him. I was hopelessly in love with a stranger.

And that is when I broke the promise I made to my mother. I kept Richard a secret from my parents. When they asked me what I was doing on my computer all night I told them a little white lie….oo”oh just talking to my friend about some of the guys we knew from school.”

“Oh which friend” she asked?

“My friend Jess. She goes to school in Rhode Island. She is at Rhode Island University. (She was actually from Rhode Island, and if my mother ever mentioned her to my other friends, she would never learn about my little white lie.

So you might wonder why I would keep Richard such a secret.

The truth was that we were from two entirely different worlds. Richard had grown up in New Mexico and was part Native American and part Mexican. His family was not quite poor, but not middle class either.  His parents were divorced and he lived with his father and brother in Nevada. He never went to college afer he graduated from high school. He had a job as a store clerk in his local town and dabbled in auto body work with his father when he could get it.

I on the other hand was from a moderate high upper class family. My parents were both professionals; my dad was an accountant and my mom was a nurse. I was raised with a firm, but loving hand and learned the values of hard work and study needed to succeed in society. Although we were not religious my background was Jewish. I had peachy skin and golden blonde hair.

So with that being said, I knew my parents would be quite upset with me for entertaining a relationship like the one I was having with Richard. But I had a different perspective on life. It did not matter to me where a person came from or how they grew up. I was always able to read a person’s life by how they acted and how they spoke. Lastly, the new world never looked down on mixed relationships anymore.

As the months went by, we came up with various plans to meet. The more determined I was to be with Richard, the more strained I found my relationship with my parents. We constantly argued about everything; from my attitude to my lack of interest in spending time with the family.

So when Richard called me one night and told me that his father had agreed to sending me a plane ticket to Nevada, I was ready to leave. Of course I had to keep it a secret from my parents and did that pretty well for about a month. 

Next came the little white lie. I told my parents that Jess had invited me up to her school for a college rally. Since she did not have a roommate, but had an extra bed in her room, I would have some place to stay. My parents approved the idea and even agreed to drive me to the airport.

When my father dropped me off at the airport that day, I turned around and looked my father squarely in the eyes and said “I love you.” For just a fleeting second I almost felt like turning around and wantes to go back home to safety. But I didn’t. I got out of the car and walked into the airport terminal.

That was the last time I would ever see my family again.

At this point of the story you might ask what happened to me when I got to Nevada? Well I can tell you that my life changed quite a bit.

I found Richard’s famiy to be quite warm and accepting of me. I was quickly able to find a job in a local school, teaching fifth graders. (I had already eaned a teaching license from Pennsylvania university).

Richard and his father opened an auto body shop in town and mads a good living from the business.

Richard and I were finally married and brought up two beautiful, healthy children. My daughter looked like Richard, and my son looked like me.

When my children reached the age of reasoning, I passed down the lesson of secrets and little white lies to them.

It has now been twenty five years since that cold night in January and my lessons have paid off. When I woke up this morning, I found a note from my son Jason on the pillow. It read 

…..“Mom and Dad. I have a little secret to tell you. You are going to be grandparents and I am eloping to be with the love of my life, like you did when you met dad. See you soon.”

At this point in my story you might ask what happened with my family. The honest answer would be to say they forgave me. I mean what parent is willing to give up their child for any mistakes that their children have made.

When my children were born, they slowly came around to understand that I had been successful after all. They lavished my children with gifts and sent cards for every birthday and holiday. But they never came out to visit. Now they are too old to travel, so I pronised to visit them with Richard one day soon. 

There are no more secrets or little white lies to tell.