Anxiety Disorder and You

Jane March was a junior at Denver High when she saw a therapist for the very first time. She walked into the small building with high hopes that the woman she was seeing could help ease her stress. The SAT's were in a couple of months and she was worried non-stop. She wanted to go to an Ivy League school like Brown, Harvard, or Yale. Jane walked past a large painting of a beach done in pointillism by Georges Seurat. Jane loved to look at paintings and decide which styles they were. She walked  up to the front desk where a woman with a sour expression sat typing swiftly across her keyboard.

"Name, please," she said, barely looking up from her computer. Her typing paused, and that's when Jane realized the woman  was talking to her. "Oh, um, Jane March. I'm here to see Mrs. Jenn, " Jane said without an ounce of confidence. "I'm Mrs. Macky, the receptionist. I'm afraid we won't be able to talk much because," she checked her watch, "your appointment starts in a matter of minutes, and Mrs. Jenn loves punctual patients." Mrs. Macky paused. "The waiting room's right down there, hon'," she said pointing down a long hallway that leads to a baby blue door with the words "Waiting Room" painted on it in flowery letters. She took a deep breath. You've got this, she said to herself, take it one step at a time.

The walls started to close in on her. They became closer with every step. Spikes grew on the door to the waiting room. Jane backed up into a wall. "Are you all right, deary?" Mrs. Macky asked, bringing Jane back to earth. The walls weren't closing in on her and the spikes had disappeared from the door. She steadied herself and took a deep breath. "Yes," she responded to Mrs. Macky, "It happens all the time." Only then did she notice a tall blonde woman standing in the corner of the hallway. The woman was wearing a bright red pantsuit and red lipstick. 

"Jane March," she whispered quietly, "I will see you now."

Jane stood up straight and tried to level herself with Mrs. Jenn. It was a trivial attempt considering Mrs. Jenn was three inches taller than Jane. They walked down another corridor and Jane followed Mrs. Jenn into a purple room. 

"Please, take a seat," Mrs. Jenn said with a smile. Jane sat in the purple cushioned seat, "I saw what happened out there. Would you care to explain?" Mrs. Jenn asked. 

Jane swallowed her pride and said, "They happen quite a lot. The world seems to go black and white. The worst possible scenario plays out in my head, a knot ties in my stomach, and it feels impossible to get a breath in or out." 

Mrs. Jenn nodded. "I see," she said thoughtfully, "those are called anxiety attacks. Is there a specific way for you to cope with them?" she asked bluntly.

 Jane gulped. This was the first time she was telling anyone about her anxiety, and she was nervous. "I like to think about my writing. I love to read and write and thinking about my current stories helps to calm me down." 

Mrs. Jenn nodded once more. "Okay, I have an assignment for you. I want to go to the self-help aisle in the bookstore .   Find one book on anxiety. I want you to read it and I want to bring it in next week, when you see me." Jane wasn't enthusiastic about completing her assignment, but she would complete it as she had done with all assignments in her life.

After an hour of getting to know Mrs. Jenn, Jane scheduled appointment for next week at the same time and left. She unlocked her car. She drove to the nearest bookstore, which just happened to be the one she visited frequently. She had until next week, but like always, she wanted to complete her assignments early. 

She entered the bookstore and the clerk waved to her.

 "Hey, Jane. Continuing your classical literature study, I presume?" The clerk asked. 

"No, can you show me where the self-help aisle is, Gary?" 

Jane had been to the bookstore so many times, she knew the regular clerks by name. Gary stood from his seat behind the counter and led her down  the aisles. They took two lefts and a right, Gary navigated the aisles like a professional explorer. 

"Here, the self-help aisle," Gary said, displaying the books in a very Vanna White-like manner. 

"Enjoy, Jane," he said as he left.

She strolled down the aisle, back and forth. She found the books on Anxiety Disorder. There was Anxiety for Dummies, Anxiety in a nutshell, and Anxiety Disorder and You: The Illustrated Version. She picked up Anxiety Disorder and You: The Illustrated Version, and flipped through the pages. She spotted funny comics and coping tactics. She went to checkout and paid for it with her money from working at the FroYo Loco place down the street.

 "Are you sure?" Gary asked, "This is nothing like anything you've bought before." 

He added, concerned. "Is anything wrong?".

 "No, not at all. It's for an assignment," Jane replied, guilty she was lying to Gary.

As Jane left the store, she checked the time-4:33 pm. Dinner was in a half-hour, and it would take her ten minutes to drive home. She had seventeen minutes to spare. She walked back to the desk section. Row after row of tables, comfy chairs and reading lamps. The cushioned chairs were red, and the tables were purple. They were set up to color clash, to keep you focused. I sat in the cushioned chair closest to the bookshelf, so close that from a certain angle you wouldn't even know that the chair, or the person, was there.

Jane opened the book to page 1. Chapter 1: Anxiety Summary.

Anxiety is the body's natural reaction to an excessive amount of stress; a deep spiraling fear and worry for one specific thing that can cause an anxiety attack. Anxiety attack symptoms are: a knot in the stomach, difficulty breathing, and your mind is playing out the worst case scenario. Some people with anxiety use sarcasm and jokes to cover up their attacks. This coping mechanism is called cynicism. There are many different kinds of anxiety disorders. Social Anxiety Disorder is the most common. 

Jane checked her watch once more- 4:50 pm. Right on time. She rushed to leave the store, and then drove home. That night, she stayed up late contemplating the information from the book. She picked it up off of her nightstand, and turned on her lamp. 

Chapter 2: Social Anxiety Disorder. Social Anxiety Disorder, in the simplest form, is feeling like your gonna be embarrassed whenever you do anything. Social Anxiety causes you to feel like you can't say anything to anybody you don't know, for fear of bothering them. After that sentence, Jane was snoring. The book was splayed across her chest.

By next week, Jane could recite the definitions of all the different anxiety disorders, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Panic Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Social Anxiety Disorder. She was prepared for her appointment with Mrs. Jenn. She walked into the therapy office, greeted Mrs. Macky, and began her trek to the waiting room. Jane took a step, and then another, and an attack rolled over her. Spikes grew on the waiting room door. WAIT!! Jane reviewed her knowledge of all things related to anxiety. She took three deep breaths, and counted back from five Everything was back to normal. She walked all the way into the waiting room. She took a seat. After a couple of minutes, Mrs. Jenn walked into the room, saw Jane holding the book and said, " I'm glad to see you completed your assignment, and made it to the waiting room!" Mrs. Jenn had a huge smile on her face. She was proud of her patient.