Silver lining

By Yvonne Albers – South Africa

I sat there with my mouth partly open. The shock of the words that were coming from his mouth stung like nothing I had ever felt. Was this happening to me here in front of all these people? The scene he laid at my feet made the breath disappear from my lungs and the tears burning down my cheeks. I was numb and speechless to what I was experiencing at that second in life.

All I could do was reach for my bag between my legs and slowly remove myself from the restaurant. Only for him to lean over and tell me not to make a scene.

Don’t make a scene what the hell do you call this that you are doing. The words were screaming through my mind wishing that it would reach my mouth and smack him in his face. But that is not how a woman behaves is all I could hear my Grandmother telling my sub-conscious.

Leaving the restaurant in the smoothest manner possible. The first thing I could bring myself to do was call my friend Anthony. Hoping he would be able to rescue me from this situation.

“Hey girl, how’s your date going”

“Hey,” I said it with a quiver in my voice

“Can you come and fetch me, please”

“Are you okay, what happened”

“He humiliated me and dumped me in front of everyone. According to him, I tend to make a scene when I hear something I don’t like.” The words were clear in my head but cracked when my mouth opened.

“Where are you, I am on my way”

I told him where he could find me. The wait felt like a lifetime, which only made the agony of replaying the night's events worse. Grasping as what thoughts I could trying to find the one thing I missed to not have seen this coming. When we first met, I didn’t think much of him but he was funny and quite persistent with his interest in me. Before I knew it, we were a couple of years into a relationship. It wasn't supposed to last 3 months according to my friends. They had been joking saying that tonight must be special if he's asked you to dress up.

“Maybe, he's going to ask you to move in with him”

“Ooh maybe, he's going to ask you to marry me”

“Guys don’t jump the gun lets first see what happens before you go planning what I am going to wear.” bursting out into laughter.

This memory was what came to the foreground of mind.

Anthony finally arrived in his old red Ford Capri, which backfired as it ground to a halt in front of me.

Climbing in, he hands me a box of tissues, giving me a weak smiling.

“Are you okay.”

Smiling at the gesture in front of me.

“No," As I continued to cry. "I feel like I can’t breathe, what went wrong, why didn’t I see this coming. Why can I read everyone else’s disasters before they happen but I can’t even see my own disaster coming”

Sniffing and wiping my nose after I blew it into the tissue. Anthony listened to every word, squeezing my shoulder whenever he thought appropriate.

I ask him to stay with me to prevent me from doing something stupid. Which he had seen me do before after finishing a bottle schnapps. Reaching into the back seat he showed me his ready bag and a packet of alcohol and ice-cream.

“You know me too well”

Laughing at each other we finally arrived at my apartment. Anthony set up while I went and changed into something more comfortable. Downing some shots and eating ice-cream, I put my head on his shoulder.

“Why are men such prats”

“Because we are”

“Your boyfriend doesn’t think so he thinks the sun shines out your ass”

“Ooh snap, girl your claws are showing, and besides I am the exception to the rule”

“Where is he by the way”

“Dealing with his own disastrous friend. Tonight seems to be break-up with your lover’s night. It must be something in the water.”

“Men are pricks”

“You’ve said so, you need to find some new words to define what men are.”

The rest of the week went by in a blur, the only thing that seemed to help was work. I threw myself into the project my boss had handed me the next day so that I would have to think about Justin.

But even that only helped so much before my thoughts caught up to me. Which lead me to tear up in front of everyone for no reason. The looks came with the confusion of what was happening to me.

Two weeks had passed when my boss called me into his office. Groaning to myself wondering what had I done wrong this time. He only ever called me in and closed the door for some kind of reprimand. I sat and I could hear my heart beating in my ears. I took in a deep breath only for my boss to hand me a piece of paper.

Confused I took it and began to read it.

“I have been told to give that to you if I had my way, I would have thrown it away”

Even more confused, I read the document. It was a promotional option. One which would mean me having to move to the coast.

“Why wouldn’t you want me to have this”

“Why, because you are good at your job and without you… I don’t want to think about it”

“Thank you, I think”

“Well take that with you think about and let me know, they are very keen for you to lead your own team. But please won’t you consider staying, I can’t pay you more but I can give you more time off and other perks”

“Thank, I will”

My mind went blank for the rest of the day. No more audible thoughts came out of it again. Not until I got to the restaurant where I met up with Anthony and his boyfriend Brett. Sitting down in silence staring at the table before I realised Anthony was waving a hand in front of my face.

Looking up I apologised.

“Where is your mind tonight, it better not be on the looser Justin you have wasted enough thoughts on him”

“No, yeah I still miss him, but no it's not him. My boss gave me this”

I handed over the promotion letter only to have them begin screaming with excitement.

“Don’t you see, this is just what you need a new beginning away from here away from memories of Justin”

“Huh, what, but it’s the promotion side that has me stumped”

Laughing loud they chorused

“The promotion has her stumped”

Leaning in and pointing to her while he spoke

“Because sweetie you are the best at what you do and it’s about time someone noticed.”

“Hell! they noticed! to the point that they gave her promotion darling,” Brett said shoving Anthony.

“So are you going to take it”

“I guess I am, I always wanted to live at the ocean and like you said I need a fresh start”

Smiling and shrugging my shoulders I began to get excited. I guess there was a silver lining to Justin dumping me because now I can move without a second thought.