Did I Really Say That?

Did I Really Say That?

Suzanne Marsh

“Will you marry me?” What should have been the simplest proposal of all time became a comedy scene out of the Three Stooges, with me being the third stooge. How did the comedy of errors begin? Simple, I asked my friend Alan and his girlfriend Angela to help me propose to my girlfriend Megan. I should have known better, Alan never ever got things right on the first try. I had to make this count, I had the ring, I finally had the nerve. I had been dating Megan for two years, I thought I had waited long enough. I arranged to take her out for dinner at the Old Red Mill, a romantic restaurant. It was in November, it was snowing. I told her we were going to meet Alan and Angela there. She liked them both and it sounded like fun. I reserved a table in front of the fireplace for seven. I was as ready as I would ever be. I put the diamond ring in my jacket pocket. I picked her up at six, I figured it would take twenty minutes to get there, I could propose before Alan and Angela arrived. What I thought and what transpired were two entirely different things!

Megan and I arrived around six twenty in the evening, the snow at this point was white and fluffy, the wind calm. We walked hand in hand into the Old Red Mill, the receptionist took my name, and we were promptly seated five tables away from the fireplace. That was the best they could do so we either sat there or we could dine in the old dining coach that was restored. I asked Megan which she would prefer. We decided on the old dining coach, somehow that seemed more romantic, at least at the moment. I began to think of a quote by Ogden Nash; “Candy is Dandy but Liquor is Quicker.” I asked Megan what she would be like to drink, she decided a Daiquiri would be nice, I ordered a strong Martini for myself. This was going to be the beginning of a beautiful evening together.

Screech! Bang! The dining car shook, This was not boding well, shortly afterward Alan and Angela, looking wild eyed, entered following the waitress. Alan plunked himself down in the bentwood chair:

“I hope you have your car here, mine is being towed. I hit the railroad car, no one was hurt but

my car is totaled.” I sat there speechless, Megan, her mouth agape:

“How did you hit that diner car?” Alan simply shook his head, he had no idea. I checked my pocket, the engagement ring was safely there, at least it was where it should be. I jerked my head back to try to attain Alan’s attention. I wanted he and Angela to go to the bar for approximately twenty minutes. He was oblivious to any motion I made. Megan was becoming very perplexed, with my performance. Angela finally determined what I was attempting to do. Before I could get the words out, Alan in a loud voice began:

“Did you do the did yet? Did we miss it?” I wish I could have sunk under the table, ti would been less embarrassing. We know had everyone’s attention, including the manager. I quietly told Alan to Angela to the bar, then return in about twenty minutes. I hoped that would give me enough time to ask Megan properly. Once Angela had herded Alan toward the bar, I once again felt the small velvet box with the ring in it. I slipped out of the seat and onto one knee, I did not realized I also had part of the white linen table cloth tucked into my pants. I knelt down on one knee and clasped Megan’s hand in mine:

“Megan, I have waited two years to do this right, will you marry me?” Megan nodded yes as I placed the ring on her finger. I stood up and the drinks, the dishes, everything flew down onto the floor, with a resounding crash. It seemed as if every eye was on us. Alan and Angela hearing the ruckus from the bar came in. There I stood dripping Martini all over me, Megan’s Daiquiri landing in her lap. Talk about disaster, a horrifying disaster this was it. The worst that could happen is they would both smell like a distillery until we went home. Angela spotted the ring first and squealed her delight at the sight. Alan, hung back attempting to at least get the waitress to bring something clean up some of the mess. Finally the waitress arrived, along with several busboys to clean up my disaster, hoping I had done my worst.

I hoped I had done my worst also but as usual, Murphy was working overtime. The waitress moved us to another table, while the busboys continued to clean up the area. We placed our orders, two rare steaks for Alan and I, pork chops for Angela and Megan ordered the salmon. That was simple enough, we waited patiently snacking on cheese and crackers, with wine. Things were going to well actually, at least for me. I had not committed so many mistakes since I was ten years old, I lost a white mouse my mother found on her leg, but that is a different story.

Dinner arrived, we ate and talked about future plans, our wedding, honeymoon. All was well with our world for the time being. I looked out the window, stunned; snow was coming down hard and quickly. We were going to have to leave shortly in order to return home before the weather worsened. Right, that would have been a good thing, until I realized I couldn’t find my wallet and car keys. I was in a panic, if I did not have my wallet I could not pay for dinner, no keys and we were going to marooned here for the night. I motioned the waitress and explained what the problem was, she got the manager:

“Sir, how could have lost both your wallet and your car keys? We can put you up here for the

night but you will have to have some one bring the money or credit card.”

More diners were becoming concerned about the snow and wind, it had gone from a picture from Currier and Ives to a blizzard with howling winds. Roads were closed, we were all stuck here till morning.

I called my brother the following morning, explained what had happened. He had an extra key to my car, that was great. He said he would take care of the bill, it could at least another twenty fours before the roads would be open and traffic beginning to move. Sure enough forty eight hours after my brother arrived. I grabbed my jacket from the coat room, stuck my hand in my jacket pocket, there was my wallet and car keys. My brother Joe laughed at my plight, the manger gave me a strange look, and the waitress wiped tears from her eyes as Megan and I walked out hand in hand.