The Spiders

The tiny spiders gathered together in a small room, thus starting one of the first Spider Home Broker meetings. The society was kept secret for a very important reason, but none of them seemed to know what it was. When asked, they would only mutter, "Only the humans know." What they did know was that the meetings would be biweekly, as directed by the lead spider (Who they were, no one knew).  Storm clouds were brewing in the dark night sky as they huddled together under the shade of the faded red soup can. They were in the first of many spider cities, which was in the Toronto suburbs. There was a lovely ditch nearby, which they passed as all of the spiders clamoured to find a spot in the crowded can. Finally, though, there was relative silence as they all stood as still, all dreading the feared robin. Why? Robins were the bane of spiders, for a good reason, their orange, almost red crest being the symbol of doom (and also of their best hockey team). That hockey team had dominated for years. One particularly optimistic and happy spider got up to the front of the can to speak, and said, in a booming voice, "First of all, I would like to mourn the loss of the Itsy Bitsy Spider... Who fell, quite tragically, down a villainous water spout... Also known as Alex... Who was a great friend to many of us, and a wonderful entrepreneur and home broker. My sports team, the Toronto Robins, has invested heavily in their funeral, and I would be very happy to welcome any fellow mourners to the party we will have afterwards." "Hear, hear!" Called out Gab (Gab being short for Gabriel Lee). Their voice sounded loudly and nasally from the other side of the room. "Thank you, Gab. Of course," Bellowed the voice once more, "Alex's sacrifice is not only a terrible, terrible tragedy by itself... But shows, once and for all... That humans are quite dangerous, as we can all very much agree." There were a few muffled "Hear, hear,"s at this from the rest of the large group. And then, the incredibly secret gathering of spiders then dispersed (or tried to) throughout the space, and began to gab about the usual: Ideal web locations, global geo-political conflict, incompetent web-slingers, micro-organisms, who was getting what type of leaf, macroeconomics, who was going to the party afterwards, how so incredibly secret their meetings were,  etc., etc... There was, as in all parties, one spider in the back, that did not know this was a meeting for home brokers. And so, they were quite oblivious to the whole affair. They puttered aimlessly around. All the while screeching things, crazy things, like, "Have you seen what Alex did today?" Or "Wow, that is a great booming thunderous cloud over there, I hope the humans are alright," and to keep a long story short, everyone considered this spider quite insane. Of course, it was a great meeting, other than those silly ramblings! Everyone could agree so. And this consensus would eventually result in hushed whispers across the can, from one group of spiders to another one, with the rumours that there was obviously an imposter in their groups. How could that crazy spider be a Home Broker if they were ranting about 'red being everywhere'? It's unheard of! Outrageous! Eventually, the voice was once again booming. This time, however, at the rantings of the spider and their... Human liking sentiments. "Humans are the enemy!" Said the voice, "Humans are important parts of the ecosystem, they are omnivores" Replied the outcast spider meekly, "I like them. Humans eat and kill the birds that are our natural predators. You know... Partridges; robins; chickadees... Isn't that grand? They're like our guardians. They also have thousands of scientific breakthroughs! I heard one came today to harness lightning, after being inspired by another scientist..." Silence from the rest of the spiders as the clouds started to loom closer in the distance. Taking a deep breath as a glare of sunlight flashed in their many red eyes, the socially rejected spider continued by saying, "They also give us a home by letting us stay in their spaces. You know, homes and apartments and the such. You see that red one over there? I live there, and I'm sure you do too!" The rest of the spiders in the room laughed at this. It was a loud, but shallow sound that echoed throughout the whole chamber. Gab said, hesitantly, "You really don't think that, do you? It's all a joke, right?" with an edge in their voice. However, this edge the spider did not hear, for a great loud boom of thunder echoed in the distance. And it started to rain, the sky turning a murky grey as clouds rolled in by the thousands. And the spiders, at this point, grudgingly abandoned their pursuit of their very, very secret society to retreat for the night. They all scurried back to their own webs without another word. Gab wanted to stay behind to talk to the outcast, but eventually hurried off with the rest of the very, incredibly busy lot. It was getting dark, after all. Thunder once again exploded in the distance, creating a stark silhouette as the spiders ran out of the can and back into their Toronto homes (which, they were loath to admit, were in the apartments of humans). However, that one outcast spider stayed behind. They waited for a bit, until Alex walked out from their hiding place under a great large leaf near the ditch. And the two had a wonderful talk about a thousand nothings a few ways away from the can, in a field, covered by the steady grey rain as a red kite flew overhead, a bald human cursing as they adjusted the string to try to get some lightning in there (and also cursing the spiders nearby). Thus concluding one of the first Spider Home Broker meetings.