The Ski Trip

There was no reason for them to take two cars. Maria had a five seater, and with each of the four girls only carrying a weekends worth of stuff in their overnight bags, there was plenty of room. The only reason for taking a seperate car was because of Sonia. Sonia had said she wanted to, and that was a good enough reason. 

“It’s only a three hour drive.” 

Lana said trying to reason with her. 

“I’ve driven to Vermont before, I know.” 

Said Sonia, smoking a cigarette while on the phone with her. Her pulls on the cigarette were so dramatic, so pronounced, that Lana could easily hear them. It made her crave one herself. 

“Okay, well, I dont really understand...Maria’s dad’s car has...”

“Yeah, has 5 seats. Yeah I know. Listen...”

Lana imediately stopped listenkng and let out a frustrated sigh, covering the phone speaker as she did. No matter how hard she tried, Sonia would never just 'play ball'. 

“I don’t get why you wanna be cramped with the two of them anyway...”

Sonia continued

“I know you’re like in love with Maria and you’re like childhood friends and like share souls and all,”

Lanas frustration began mounting as Sonia when on. 

“But like, you need to think about me too alright? No offence but I don’t need a three hour car ride with the two of you reminiscing about preschool while I’m crammed in the backseat with that grandma driving of hers.”

Lana couldn’t help but agree in her mind that Maria did, in fact, drive like a grandma. But in terms of everything else Sonia had said, Lana also couldn’t help but resent her for her jealous and competitive nature towards their friendship and Lana couldn’t help but resent herself for her own powerlessness to speak up for herself. 

The yearly ski trip was something Lana and Maria had grown up doing with their families and then continued to do together along with Maria’s sister Gale, who was only a year younger. Gale was always somewhat of a third wheel to their friendship, but it never truly mattered to any of them. The three girls all got along without any issues. 

Lana and Sonia became friends one summer working at a thrift store. Sonia was older and more experienced than Lana. Her influence on Lana became apparent almost imediately as Lana smoking, putting streaks in her hair, piercing her nose and suddenly acquiring an obscure taste in music and film. 

Eventhough Maria wasn’t crazy about Lanas sudden changes, mor was she particularly fond of the new friend Lana had made—who quite made her disapproval of Maria and her prudish nature apparent from the beginning— Maria accepted Sonia as a fourth member to the annual ski trip one year. 

Maria understood deep down that things had changed. Lana and Sonia has worked together for several years by that point and Sonias influence on the impressionable Lana had simply grown more pervasive. Maria saw less and less of her best friend, aside from the ski trips, and even when they did see each other, Lana's interests had changed; the innocent, kind hearted girl Maria had grown to cherish seemed to be fading before her eyes. 

And Maria, in her agreeable way, took no issue with Sonia joining that year's ski trip, or with her request to take Lana with her in her own car, no matter how much it pained her to watch Lana being torn away from her. 

...

With enough warm clothes, one sexy nighttime outfit and makeup and other toiletries, along with a weeks worth of cigarettes and booze (eventhough it was only a weekend trip) the car was packed and they set on their way. 

The car ride was their usual conversation. Sonia complained about the work politics at their thrift store, and why she should be manager, while Lana agreed with everything she said. Sonia made fun of the other coworkers and took slight jabs at Maria while Lana tried to change the topic 

Lana still hadn’t grown accustomed to speaking badly of people. Eventhough Sonia spoke badly of everyone they knew all the time, and even though it was often quite hilarious (especially the nicknames she would come up for people, like the one for a particularly feminine male co-worker— Earl The Girl, or “cunt face”—reserved for their store manager. ) The crass brand of cynicism that Sonia expelled whenever they were together was an interesting mixture of alluring, but also repulsive to Lana. As off-putting and unsettling as it was, Lana felt a certain attachment towards Sonia's snarky attitude.

Lana was drawn to the feeling she got of being a grown up whenever they were together. She enjoyed the freezing winds streaming through the car windows as they sailed along smoking cigarettes and cussing and blaring rock music. Just the two of them, out on the roads, free to do anything. When Lana was with Maria and Grace, they were girls. When Lana was with Sonia, they were women. Angry and embittered, women.

The chalet had two bedrooms with a common living room. Sonia immediately claimed the larger room of the two as hers and Lana’s, before all four of the girls settled in and then headed to the slopes. 

Sonia wasn’t a good skier. Not nearly as good as the other three girls. As a result, Lana stayed with her on the beginner hills while the other girls went and put themselves to the test on the advanced hills. Lana had noticed the look of pity Maria gave her as she regretfully explained she would “Hang back with Sonia on the bunny hills.”

An hour went by before Sonia complained of needing a smoke and a coffee. Lana struggled to contain herself from letting out an exasperated sigh before they left the slopes and headed for the cafeteria. The hours rolled by as they continued smoking and drinking coffee, Sonia complaining about ex-boyfriends, while Lana secretly not listening and wishing to be on the slopes. She was beginning to feel like she had made a mistake. 

But that feeling changed when, after the sun had set, and all the girls sat down for dinner, Sonia updated them all on the plans for the evening. 

“So, My friend Christine’s ex boyfriends friend Craig is a promoter for this night club. He got us a booth. It’s close to the chalet. We’ll have free booze all night. “

She stared straight into Maria’s eyes smiling as she delivered the news. 

Maria looked down shyly 

“Uh, we don’t really drink, or uh, go to nightclubs. We were thinking of just calling it an early night to get on the slopes and see the sunrise tomorrow. Maybe we’ll watch a movie though?”

Sonia laughed and looked over to Lana, not bothering with a response. 

Lana choked on her hamburger. Once again, Lana had been caught in the middle. While literally seated between the two opposite forces which had been pulling her towards them, Lana felt those same parts within herself diverging, and herself, falling deeper into an endless chasm of indecision.

There was only one answer she could give.

"Sonia's idea sounds fun, though."

While it was honest--she did really want to go out on the town-- it was also her safest option. To deny Maria was most likely a forgivable offence; To deny Sonia was a different story altogether.

Maria and Sonia weren't the most attractive girls in the night club. They didn't have many guys hovering around them the way the other girls did, and the guys who did hover around them were "Losers" as Sonia would say, but then again, all the guys were "Losers" according to Sonia.

They continued drinking and eventually Lana found herself smiling, likely for the first time on the entire trip thus far. Eventually, a handsome looking guy with neatly combed hair and a turtleneck approached the two of them. Sonia told him to get lost, but he didnt budge. His eyes were fixed on Lana's. Lana found herself affixed towards him. Sonia tried to pull her away, but for once, Lana held her ground.

"Youre cute."

He said, without any trace of the usual nervous guy twitchiness Lana had seen in all the previous attempts made on her that night.

Lana smiled at him.

"I'm Darren."

"I'm Lana."

Darren extended his hand and to her own surprise, and to Sonia's, Lana placed her hand in his.

By the time the club was closing Lana and Darren had danced together and laughed together and connected on a deep level about their futures. Lana told Darren how she had planned to quit the thrift store and go back to school full time and work as a high school guidance councillor. Darren told her he also wanted to work in high school, but as. Geography teacher.

Lana stared into his eyes, and for the first time in all her life, after all the boys she had ever encountered, she felt what she assumed to be feelings of love.

At that moment, Darren took her head in his hands and pulled her in for a kiss. Lana felt herself floating as their lips met and he wrapped his arms around her-- at least momentarily, before being pulled away by Sonia.

"Hey, lay off my friend! Creep!"

"Sonia- its its o-kay....."

"No it isn't! You're drunk! He is taking advantage! Lets go! You are drunk"

"Wait a second, wait a second"

Said Darren

"It's cool, lets just exchange info, we'll talk when she is sober."

"Get AWAY!" Said Sonia, raising her voice.

"Hey!"

Said Darren

"I like her. I just want to get to know her, trust me. Im not a-a -"

"Yeah sure, you're not just trying to get in her pants? Don't make me call fucking security you creep."

Darren looked at Lana and Lana, unsure of what to do, looked to the floor.

Sonia grabbed her by the arm and led her back through the frozen streets, to the chalet.

There wasn't much conversation on the slopes the next day. Infact, there was hardly any at all. Maria wasn't talking to Lana. Lana wasn't talking to Sonia. And Sonia wasn't talking to anyone. Grace simply minded her own business and enjoyed a day full of skiing.

When it was time to go, Lana said good bye to Maria and Grace and they all hugged cordially while Sonia scoffed, and lit a cigarette and gave a nod before revving her engine to say: "Lets fucking go"

The car was silent for the first fifteen minutes before Sonia put on the radio and opened another pack of cigarettes.

Sonia didn't offer Lana one, but nudged the package in her direction. Lana simply ignored it.

"Can't wait to see Cunt Face tomorrow"

Said Sonia

Lana didn't say anything

"She's probably gonna want me to do all the inventory again. God knows she didnt get anything done this weekend besides drink her lattes and complain about Richard or Terrence or whatever the fuck his name was."

Lana just sat and stared

"That Maria, huh? Id bet she had tons of fun watching her movie last night with her sister. HA, so lame!"

Said Sonia, carefully watching to gauge Lana's reaction.

A few moments went by, while the radio filled the silence.

"I think Im quitting the store."

Said Lana.

"Quitting? You can't quit. What the hell do you plan on doing if you quit?"

"Im going to become a high school guidance councillor."

Sonia shook her head.

She lit a cigarette and continued shaking your head.

"I knew it."

She said.

" I always fucking knew it."

She said

"You're just like your friend Maria. Go be like your friend Maria. I don't know why I even came on this stupid trip. God are you guys fucking boring."

It was still a long car ride ahead.

And about an hour later, Sonia said

"I bet she's gonna have me doing inventory tomorrow. Fucking Cunt Face."