Attention Seeking

Note: I watched the show You, and tried to make something like it, but it didn't turn out that way :( …hope you like it!

The creaky screen door slammed when you walked out of the house. I quickly followed, trying to figure out what you were mad about now.

As soon as I got closer to you, I crossed my arms. “What are you freaking out about now?” I asked, tired of this never ending shit show.

“I’m leaving you Maurice,” you said quietly. “I’m leaving you!”

I looked at you, unfazed. The amount of times you had done this before was fucking ridiculous.

“No you're not.” I said calmly.

“Yes I am!” You yelled back.

I bet the neighbors have gotten used to this.

I grab the collar of my shirt that you're wearing and pull you closer.

“You don't leave me. I leave you. Don’t even try.” I let go and tilt my head. “Besides baby, you tried this last time. But you're still here.”

You shed some more tears, trying to make a show out of it, like you always do, but then crouched on the frosty dead leaves of our front yard.

“I’m sorry.” You said.

“As you should be.” I told you.

Absolutely ridiculous. How do I put up with this?

I don’t.

“Get inside, it's cold.” We both walked back into the house. I slammed the door behind me and walked to the kitchen.

You sat on the countertop next to the sink, tapping your fingers on your jeans.

“Why are you acting like that?” I asked aggressively.

“I don't…,” You trailed off, whispering the rest of the sentence so low that I couldn't hear.

“Speak up.”

“I don’t love you anymore,” You looked up at me.

This has never happened before. You've never said that to me, not ever. You always pretend you're going to leave because you want my attention. 

I give you my attention.

“Excuse me?”

“See?” You stand up, annoyed. “This is why. Why I don’t love you anymore. You aren't sweet to me, you always have to be rough and dominant. I’m getting tired of it. You act like you have no emotions.” 

“If I was going to make a list of things I didn't like about you, there would be nothing on it.” I said, trying to be all sweet like you wanted me to.

But it was like taking a knife to my personality, and slitting its throat. Who does that? No one should change for their partner, especially not me.

I didn't do anything wrong. You started the drama.

I just obliged.

“When we first met…how did you really know me?” you asked.

“A mutual friend.” I replied nonchalantly, snacking on a granola bar.

“Maurice…we have no mutual friends.”

I looked up.

“Sure we do. Remember Daniel?” I asked.

“Daniel didn't mention ever knowing you.”

“Well he does.”

“I’m going to call him.”

I laugh, tilting my head. “Is that really necessary? Calling him this late?” I asked you.

You looked up, pulling your phone out. “Yes.”

I dropped the granola bar into the garbage and snatched the phone out of your hand, and placed it on the counter behind us, and then I pinned you to the wall.

“I love you.” I said.

You pushed at my chest, earning yourself a glare from me.

“I love you” I said again.

“Let me go Maurice.”

“Can’t do that hon’,”

I kissed your cheek and you glared at me.

“What's wrong?”

“Tell me you love me again.” You said, tears filling your eyes. “You hardly ever say that.”

“I love you.”

“Again.” You pushed me on.

“I love you so much.”

“Again.”

“I love you more then anyone or anything. I love you and that will never change.” I said.

We kept this going for a couple more minutes, you asking me to say it again.

Did I mean it?

Well…kind of. You had just told me you didn't love me anymore. What else was I supposed to think, was I supposed to love you more after that?

“Don’t leave me.” I whispered into your ear. You planted a kiss on my neck.

“I'm not going to.” you whispered back.

“I love you.” I said, and watched your face. You closed your eyes, a smile playing on your lips.

“Tell me you love me.” I said to you this time.

“I love you.”

You wrapped your arms around me.

“I can’t live without you.” You continued. “I want to start a life together, get married, start a family…”

My eyes opened.

“I…you know that I…” I trailed off when you put a finger to my lips.

“Don’t ruin this. I didn't mean right now.” you said.

My heart rate settled. I didn't feel like getting married right now, much less start a family.

“Hold me.” You said, and I did. 

A million thoughts run through my head. Did you really mean it when you said you didn't love me? Were you really going to leave me? 

Of course not.

You just wanted me to pay attention to you, and I obliged.