Teeny tiny chicken nugget

Submitted into Contest #135 in response to: Write about a casual act of bravery.... view prompt

9 comments

Funny

Hello dear reader! The author of this conglomeration of words thanks you for taking the time (or wasting your time) to read this. Our author absolutely adores writing. He feels that the written word is so powerful. With just a pen and paper, people fall in love, declare war, invoke fear, bring comfort, joy, laughter, and sadness. Unfortunately this young man consistently fails to demonstrate any of the aforementioned power in his writing. You see, our dear author is not the sharpest spoon in the drawer, has no natural talent, a limited vocabulary, and the narrator he hired turned out to be an ass. A talking ass mind you, but an ass nonetheless.(I’m actually just a man in a donkey costume but he hasn’t figured that out yet). For all of the reasons listed above he has been quite fearful about submitting a story, letter, or grocery list to this site for fear of being removed for stupidity, poor punctuation, and lack of vegetables.


Fear, more often then not, stops our young author from moving forward in his life. He was not born brave, just naked. I suppose that’s the same as everyone else, but while other human organisms developed bravery, our young author developed something that’s quite the opposite. Cowardice! Now I don’t want you to think our boy never tried things, because that would be a lie. He tried many things and enjoyed many things. However, when something went wrong, which something always eventually goes wrong, he would give up. This constant giving up when difficulties arose led to him sacrificing hobbies he enjoyed, a girl he deeply cared for, and many priceless friends. Hence, for fear of failing, he never pursued writing despite loving it to his core. Feeling that it would just end up on the list of things he sucks at.



You might be thinking at this point, “I thought this was going to be about bravery! I did not come here to read some sad story about a sad man-child and his Jackass narrator!” First of all, that’s Mr. Jackass narrator to you! Also, patience is a virtue! So please calm down and pay attention! If you don’t read this then I’m out of a job, and you have no idea how hard it is for an imaginary man in a donkey suit to get a job as a narrator with a poor British accent in this economy! Two more minutes of harmless dribble won’t hurt you!


Anywhoo…….Our hero, (I use the term hero very loosely) decides that it is time to stop being a coward! But, unleashing large bursts of bravery is very hard to do. Especially when one is not accustom to being brave or courageous. He found that when he needed bravery the size of a large chicken dinner with all the fixings, he ended up with just a small chicken nugget. However, sometimes a chicken nugget is all that is needed. His mother (a wise woman who happened to love him despite him being duller than a spoon) would tell him a quote that has stuck in his mind for quite a while. The quote is from Mary Anne Radmacher - “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’”


When he related this quote to me I was instantly filled with memories of my own life. I related to him how hard it has been to be an imaginary donkey man. Holding down jobs, building lasting friendships, getting insurance, and getting taken seriously seemed like impossible tasks. Not to mention trying to find love. Most women don’t even know I exist! It takes quite a lot of bravery to approach a beautiful woman while wearing a donkey suit. Even when things work out my mind fills with questions. What will her parents think? What will her friends think? Can I support a family? Will she be allowed to leave the mental hospital for the wedding? I explained to him though that fear of the unknown doesn’t stop me from doing what I love. Which is wearing a donkey suit. I can’t control the imaginary thing. Yes, my situation and my personal choices have lead to failure many times but I never gave up and look at me now! I am a married imaginary man in a donkey suit living in the mind of a 26 year old idiot. I couldn’t be happier!


Despite being offended I call him an idiot, my life history gave him confidence! Bradon(that’s the authors name) realized that bravery doesn’t always have to be spectacular or visible to others. I proceeded to tell him that sometimes the bravest people are the ones we overlook. They may fight mental illness, but push through for their family. They may be bullied for what they believe in, yet they stand their ground. They may be just a lonely boy on a desert planet who finds out that he alone has to restore balance to the force and to do that, he must fight his android father and his father’s wrinkly boss! They may not believe in themselves but try their best anyway. With my mighty words burning in his minuscule mind, he decides to be brave, (well, somewhat brave) and let others read and criticize his writing. He offers to you his first piece of public word scribbles. It may be full of spelig errors, illicit content, and poor syllable emphasis, but it’s his chicken nugget. Its hard to imagine but this took quite some time to write. It’s not easy to put between 1000 to 3000 words on a page when you can only remember 13.5 words consistently. Our poor author is concerned that this page of words will not be accepted because it’s not entirely about bravery and more of a diary entry. He is more concerned that it will be accepted and people will actually read this! Nonetheless, when this diary entry of a sad man-child and his jackass narrator is rejected, burned, and hopefully forgotten, the author will wake up the next morning, pick up his tablet or pen, and, (no doubt much to the chagrin of his readers), try again.












March 01, 2022 04:31

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9 comments

Sharon Hancock
21:43 Mar 28, 2022

I completely disagree about your lack of writing talent! You have loads of talent! This is hilarious and engaging and very well-written! I read it first bc I recently wrote a funny/horror story about a chicken nugget (haven’t posted it yet), so the title had me curious. I really enjoyed this and I’m glad that chicken nugget gave you the courage to post . Three cheers for power chicken nuggets!😻

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Bradon L
01:07 Mar 29, 2022

You are too kind! Thank you. I am extremely interested in the chicken nugget horror story! That sounds epic and delicious!

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Megan E Phillips
15:31 Mar 11, 2022

I loved this! It was hilarious. I think you should write more bradon. I was laughing the whole time while reading this. Keep writing. P.S Stay sharp( not like the dull spoon)

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Bradon L
17:33 Mar 11, 2022

Thank you so much! I’m glad you liked it.

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Megan E Phillips
17:24 Mar 12, 2022

You did great this makes me laugh. Ive read it 5 times already. :)

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Bradon L
03:31 Mar 13, 2022

Really?! Wow! That makes me so happy!

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Megan E Phillips
17:18 Mar 31, 2022

I'm working on another story. But I can't enter a contest which is sad. I don't have money on my Chromebook. lol.

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Zack Powell
03:25 Mar 07, 2022

This is a fun one. I don't think I've seen metafiction on this site before, so kudos for doing something fresh and different. Pretty creative take on the prompt too, I'd say. The narrator's voice was fun and the writing was sincere. I enjoyed myself reading this. Grammar, spelling, syllable emphasis - don't worry, these are things that can picked up later. Storytelling is the key, and clearly you've got the ability to do so. Keep on writing. There's talent here. Practice is what'll bring it to the surface. P.S. My favorite line of the piece...

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Bradon L
16:44 Mar 07, 2022

Thank you so much Zach! I really appreciate it

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