Mind Games

A flush of searing hot pain flared across my left cheek, forcing salty tears to sting my eyes and cloud my vision. Heat shot up my neck to my cheek. My reddened face portrayed my evident humiliation.

“Don’t you remember what you did?” Venom coating the unknown voice.

“I didn’t do anything!” Screaming back, begging it to believe me.“I swear I didn’t do anything.”

Tears streamed down my face forming small salty puddles at my feet.

The voice laughed. Mocking me, as it screamed from all directions.

My muscles trembled with every echo of laughter as my heart threatened to burst out of my chest.

“Look,” my breath shook. “I don’t know why I’m here, and I can’t even remember the last 24 hours.”

“Tsk. Tsk. It’s not good to lie, Amara.” it said in a sing-song tone.

My mouth went dry. “Y-y-you know my name?”

“Of course I do. I know everything about you, Amara.” A cold hand crawled across my elbow, resting there for about a second before it was removed.

I didn't dare look, terrified of the thoughts stirring in my head.

“Amara, tell me the truth and we can make this whole process easier,” the voice said exasperated.

“I’m telling you I don’t know!” I replied through clenched teeth.

Rough hands grasped my face, making my eyes squeeze shut.

“ You don’t want to talk? Fine! I’ll get you to talk.” The hands released me from their painful grip, leaving my chin sore. I felt uneasy.

I have to get out of here. I fought against the rope, ignoring the burning sensation spreading across my wrist.

“Why are you doing this? Who are you?" My frustration was building up.

There was a sudden temperature drop. A shiver ran down my spine.

The voice was chilling, deadly even, “You want to see me?”

I gulped, unsure how great this idea was.

“Yes,” My voice came out more confident than I expected. The sound of my breathing filled the room.

After a few minutes, it spoke, “You know, I’m surprised you don’t know me.”

I faced forward, hearing the voice coming from that direction.

“Why? I’ve never met you before.”

“Are you sure?”

Beads of sweat formed at the base of my neck in anticipation of the shadow present at the corner of the room.

“You don’t recognise my voice?” One footstep forward, “We have met before.”

At this point, there was a clear outline of a body.

The footsteps echoed as my stomach tightened with every movement. Sweat ran down my back.

As I watched the figure step into the light, my breath caught in my throat.

“Like what you see?” the figure spun around in amusement.

“B-b-but how is that possible? You’re –”

“Me. Yes, I’m you.”

“I-I-I don’t understand.”

“I don’t need you to understand, I need you to remember.”

The sound of wheels against concrete flooded the room. A trolley was brought forward with foreign torture devices.

Dread filled me as I knew what was coming.

“Stay away from me!” I thrashed around in my seat to avoid the contraption from being placed on my head.

“The quicker you stay still, the quicker this gets done.”

I watched as the upper lip of my doppelganger curled with vicious intent, excited at the prospect of hurting me.

“Now that it’s on you, hopefully, you will give me answers that are satisfactory.”

“This is how it’ll go. I will ask you a question, and if I don’t like the answer, I’ll turn up the dial to a higher voltage, which of course won’t be painful for m,e at least.”

“I’ve told you this befor,e I don’t know anything!”

“Wow! I haven’t even asked a questio,n and I’m already disappointed by your response,” the voice sighed.

I watched as she moved the dial up and switched it on.

Fire tore up my chest. My surroundings blurred as the pain increased.

She turned off the machine, ceasing the burning agony all over my body.

“Now, are you ready to answer?”

“Please, I didn’t do –”

Another wave of anguish seized my body, leaving me writhing in my chair.

Succumbing to the pain, I could hear the voice in the back of my head, but it gradually faded away as my vision faded to black.

- - -

It was the smell that hit me first. The smell of a Sunday roast with your family around the dinner table.

Opening my eyes, I found myself surrounded by familiar white walls covered in Polaroids of my friends and family. I was home.

But how did I get here?

Getting out of bed, I crept downstairs towards the dining room where the smell was the strongest.

Everything seemed normal. My family was at their usual seats, but I still felt strange.

“Hello?”

No response. Just utter silence.

I waved my hand in front of their faces to evoke a response. Nothing happened. Not even one blink.

Suddenly, the scene shifted to a long hallway filled with pictures from when we were kids.

What should have been nostalgic was rather eerie, producing goosebumps all over my body.

Walking further, my footsteps creaked across the floorboards.

I halted, and a metallic smell hit my nose.

Blood, that’s blood.

The creaking sounds poured from the floorboard as I sprinted towards the source of the smell. Terror sealed my throat.

A figure clutched a bloody knife hovering above my father, the blood from his neck travelling down, staining his pale blue shirt a deep red.

My fingers shook as they reached to cover my mouth in horror.

The figure stopped completely, sensing I was watching it.

As the figure turned, my heart beat loudly in anticipation.

Finally, I saw its face.

My chest was heavy. The more I gasped for air, the less I could breathe.

No, this isn't real. I didn’t do this.

Sinking to the floor, I brought my knees up to my chest.

The figure was me.

I killed my parents.

A pair of black boots painted with drops of blood moved closer to me. Squatting to my height, the figure spoke.

“You did this. You killed your family.”

“No, I didn’t,” I said, shaking my head frantically.

“You did this!” the voice screamed in my ear.

“No, I didn’t! I didn’t! I didn't! ” I covered my ears trying to block out the voice.

I clutched my chest, begging for the oxygen to return to my lungs.

My surroundings faded into darkness.

- - -

Coming to, I was back to where it all began; the windowless room.

“I see you’re awake now,” my doppelganger responded, casually cleaning their equipment

I couldn’t speak, the shock of the revelation still hitting me.

“Now that you know what you did, you deserve to suffer”

Hearing those words snapped me out of my state of shock.

My doppelganger lifted the contraption, ready to place it on my head.

“Please no! I don’t want to remember. I don’t want to remember what I did!” I choked on my tears.

I fought against the contraption, knowing it was a losing battle.

The familiar rush of pain took control of my body, leaving me unconscious.

- - -

“ So you’ve been having these nightmares for months now? No changes? Still the same windowless room, and the death of your parents?” The psychiatrist sitting across from her asked while takingnotes.

She nodded, picking at her fingers as a distraction.

“How do you feel about it?”

She shrugged, not knowing what to say.

“I think it’s your mind making you feel guilty for what happened six months ago, Amara. I can see why you killed your family. They were abusive people.”

The psychiatrist waited for Amara to respond, but as usua,l she didn’t.

“Well, that was a good session. As for the nightmares, it seems that we need to put you on a higher dose of medication so you can feel better.”

Removing her gaze from the coffee table, Amara stared at the psychiatrist to show she was listening.

After speaking to someone on the intercom, one of the guards came in, guiding her away from the psychiatrist to her room.

Stepping in, the movement of a bolt subsequently followed, locking her in. Her footsteps quickened as she headed straight to the bathroom. Releasing a loud breath, she gripped the sink, all the while staring at her reflection in the mirror, analysing every inch of her face.

She watched her eyes begin to sparkle in delight as her lips curved up in malicious pleasure.