TEN EASY THINGS

“I will never fall in love, ever again!” The vow I took one stormy night as I scream to the heavens the frustration and heartache, I hold for the tenth time of falling in love, yet being left alone to that very same reason.

"I hate it, as I should never taken that ought, just how stupid love can be!"

Crying all to my painful heart, I wanted to end everything as that word, as that feeling is pounding the stupidity, I’ve took for the tenth time and failed for that same tenth time. To the cold rain above and the running pain inside my heart, I close my eyes and let go, from the deep cold waters below as I let everything be frozen in time, a hand took me out without warning.

Everyone says that love comes in an unexpected way in the most unnatural spin of a person’s fate. That love is the most mysterious, yet the un-canniest part of everything.

That even time can be stopped, mountains can be moved and rain can be paused all because that every special person is there, that one perfect moment spins in that very second, yet, all of it was a blink of nothing but a lie.

But somehow can one person who seeks for it, can one person whose been through every hate and pain because of it, took her chance not for the first, second nor third, but for the tenth time, can find what it truly meant?

If a wish can be grant, if a star will fall, can I wish for that thing, can I say that tempting words as can I have that only thing?

To the splash of the cold water below, to that one stormy night, to the pain I wanted to freeze with mine, someone stupid enough to care, who didn't knew a thing or two, followed me down as he took my hand grabbing me out. To the darkness I decided to end to, I found a light with the mysterious letter from someone to whom took my life back.

I took the road for the spin of a year as I found the slight ray of the peeping sun through my room, sipping a hot chocolate as I write this word, into an empty room where no one besides the beating rhythm of a sound is the only thing that echoes from within. I open the window and took a breath as a thump of a footstep echoes behind, when everything turns back to the begging.

Yells and howl, a child’s cry innocent as she may seem yet has been tainted by the cruelty of wat love define her be. Ended up orphaned at the age of ten, she walks past by each family of two and always ends up with nothing.

Learned how the world works and walk alone in the cold path of being alone, a snip of her camera at her every word of three captures only what happiness of love can be, yet seems the empty hollow inside her heart. Painting the perfect family of three she wishes just how can that feeling be fleeting as it seems.

Taking the road every 4:00 pm, she is greeted by no one, but the emptiness of being one into the four corners of her safe heaven. Yet, to that stormy night of the fourth month of the fourth day of the year, a wish, yet rather a funny joke knocks not just twice, nor thrice, but with it’s fourth knock love awaits. More than a five-foot-tall man, dripping wet collapsing in her arms as she opened the door to an unexpected visitor on her 25’th birthday, he came. 5 am to that next day, a warning was knocking in front of her, deliberately wanted him out a spark from his words beats five times into her heart. Six times that she debates unto herself to run away, yet as he claims to be hers a spin of a fairytale life opens up and took her hand by the strike of her counting lips unto six. Seven-fold as she slowly unravels the life of the stranger that slowly creeping inside her heart and melting the hard ice wall that she builds for her own protection. His seven richness, his seven influence and the very seventh times he confesses, everything was so unreal, yet her now stupid heart is debating.

Struggles, pretenses and all against the eight odds, the fight that she wanted to give up only took her deep way down from within. Crying to that same stormy heart, in a rather book-based love story she screams, not a goodbye, but a fighting stance to fight and claim of what she now owns and have.

With the confession and the twine life we both have been running in circles, I was the one who saved him first that one unlucky-lucky night of the same month and rainy day of December. The hurtful howl that took him into that same bridge and the cold river from below to where he jumps at, I was the first to take his hand as the first who wrote that same letter, and the one from since that day, brought him back to life.

Funny as it may seem, to the days where I was always left alone he was there, unknown by me as he guarded me tight waiting for for the un unfaithful, but destined stormy night to be found by me.

Now as we faced the 9 thousand crowed as every 9^th person is against to the world that she now dwells into, she bravely stands beside him, waited and endured, as long as those 9 promises are kept, she will still stand to the love that thought her how to love. As the tenth steps stops and a hand hugs me from behind, I smiled as his breath echoes with our now promise tied with an infinity knot of our December noon. Maybe, no definitely I’ve been hurt for the tenth time for that ten times is not the perfect fit, for this one surely is.