Sermons

She is like every last born of that family from this part of the country. In

biafran land, indeed our culture. most last borns in a family were usually

not grounded in spheres of life, simply because of over pampering, over-

indigence. That was exactly the fate of this lady from my village. Her name

is Nkechi. She was from relatively poor family. They were seven in that

family four, girls and three boys. Their parents were famers like most

families of forties. Her father worked in logging business till he had an

accident that ended that career part of him.

Her eldest sister married one rich man from our village in early sixties and

she went to live with her in the city. Her pampering continued there. Her

eldest sister was still seeing her as a child too. Even to take care of the

kids her sister brought her to do, she found it difficult to do. Nkechi’s over

pampering both by her parents and siblings turned her into a lazy and

saucy woman.

Her family is a catholic by faith, the mother was a well known person

in their parish. She was into many women organizations in their parish. So,

it was not suprising when in the seventies, she sent her third issue to the

convent to became revered sister. Death clamed the reverened sister by

late seventies after brief illness.

In early eighties, Nkechi got married to a man from our neigbouring

village residing at Aba. Her husband was not doing well in his retail

business, so, Nkechi was asked to stay with her mother-in-law at the

village. The old woman soon began to noticeing that, Nkechi don’t know

how to do certain things that comes naturally to women of her age. The

old woman could not control her mouth, she soon, began voicing her

displeasure out. Busy bodies in the village started gossiping and it soon

entered Nkechi’s ear and acute hatred has started smouldering between

the two women and not long, it got to shouting match. From exchanging

words to dividing cooking utensils. Poke nosers started trooping in to

mediate.

Some poke nosers was even bombarding Nkechi’s husband on why

he kept quiet on what is happening in his family. Even when the

misunderstanding petered out, the idle minded villagers was still stoking

the fire of discord between the two women meanwhile, Nkechi buried

herself into Church activities for he was a member of many societies in the

parish including choir group. She was around seven months pregnant when

another quarrel erupted with her husbands siblings. They accused her of

being lazy and hard hearted. They claimed that she don’t do any work, she

will just sit down, throwing arrogant orders to people as if any of them is

her house maid. They asked her if she was the first woman to be pregnant

in this world or did she think that she is carrying president of Nigeria in

that her womb.

In all those family feud, her husband stood by her all the way that

some people soon started wondering if something else was behind that

loyality. He kept telling them that what is happening in his family is normal

with the society we found ourselves. He pointed out other families that

experienced similar problems. “ why is mine generating all these dramas,

he queried”. He was advised by those that claimed to be in the know that

he must call a spade a spade that balancing acts don’t have long life span

in a family quarrel.

She soon gave birth to their first baby and it turned out to be boy.

her husband’s joy knew no bound. all her sins, shortcoming’s flew out of

the window of her husbands heart. Even her husbands siblings mellowed

down. Nkechi entered into another phase of her melancholic behaviour.

Her husband found a seven year old girl to live with her and be helping

her, within two weeks, she has started shouting at the girl and when asked

what happened, she will say that the girl is lazy, that: all the time, she

must wait for her to tell her what to do before she will do it.” she wants to

know if all the money her husband is spending on the girl head is just for

nothing; according to her diatribe, if it continues like this, the girl has to

go.

Her mother-in-law was following all that is happening from her end.

She noticed the class of people that were coming in to see the mother and

her now born baby she began to wonder if her son is the real father of the

baby. Where did Nkechi know all these people from?, her father’s house?,

unlikely. For she knew Nkechi’s family well, the people she is witnessing

here is way above Nkechi's family standing, and Nkechi is not well

educated, not a civil servant nor business woman, where then did she

know all these individuals that has been marching in and out of their

compound for three days now.

Igbo adage said that: “A person his house is on fire don’t run after

rats”. The old woman made it her duty to get to the bottom of all she

witnessed. She thought for a long time, and decided that the first step has

to be smiling her way into Nkechi’s confidence and engaging her into

pleasant lengthy talk and gleaning some information’s from her. She

started doing most of the works Nkechi had been doing and cautioning her

against doing any stressful work at lest for three months. just to enable

her body to recover fully.

After about three weeks of persistent laying of trap for her daughter- in-

law, she was able to pick one or two names that led her to state capital

where she began her inquiry. After retorting around one of her quarries

office and neighbours, she got what she came for. She gathered that

Nkechi and the civil servant had known each other for years before she got

married. She learnt that their relationship continued after her marriage and

so, it was with other male friends of hers. The agitation of her mother in-

law knew no bounds, she sent multiply messages and messengers to her

son in Aba and told him to enter any available bus returning to their

village immediately he received her message. Nkechi’s husband after

enquiring from the message bearers about condition of things at home,

decided to honour his mothers call on the weekend. The mother became

angry with the son for waiting more three days before answering her. After

tabling the matter to the family members, persisting that nkechi must tell

all the members of that family who the real father of the kid is. She

narrated all the story she gathered and all the men in Nkechi’s life,

finalizing her speech with a threat that her family will not house and feed

another man baby. That she is a woman like her. That she never practice

infidelity throughout her years with her husband.

Nkechi refused even to be part of the meeting when she got wind of

why the meeting was called in the first place. Her husband siblings felt

offended about Nkechi walking out on them and supported their mothers

claims. They concluded that Nkechi and her husband must go for test to

determine the real father of the kid. The husband told them that those

males where according to his wife, her brother classmates and some her

family friends- when the her mother-in-law persisted that test must be

carried out, Nkechi refused and her husband playing mediator role went to

the priest believing that both parties being stunch cathiolics will only

respect the priest when he talks. The priest summoned them both Nkechi

refused to go, telling her husband that she is disappointed in him for even

going to the priest to settle family matter bordering on infidelity. When she

was summoned over and over again, by the priest and her stand remand,

the same, she was suspended for three months from every organization in

the church. she became angry and told her husband that she is no more a

catholic that she is a member of Pentecostal church now. Efforts from her

family and her husband to reconsider her decision fell on deaf ears. Her

family drummed it into her ears that it has never happened in their lineage,

changed nothing. Her husband divorced her, and her father disown her.

She packed her properties went to Awka to live with her boyfriend.