Chasing Proof

“It's been 2 years, you're going.” My bossy but loving bestie Michelle demanded as she expertly applied my makeup. It actually had been three years, but I wasn't going to correct her, consequently driving home her point.

I still couldn't believe that after three years of stress-free AKA “single living," I let Michelle talk me into going on a date. As I stared off into space while she shaped my eyebrows, my mind wandered to the moment two days ago, when she pitched this date idea.

“His name is Warren; he’s an actor and an CPA. He’s 36, no kids, is an INFJ Personality type and a Cancer.” She said in one breath as if she was afraid, I’d interrupt her.

“How’d you even meet him? I asked dubiously.

“He’s one of Channing’s gym buddies. He came home with Channing after a gym session, to get this extra jar of protein powder that Channing suggested he try. While he was here, I chatted him up.” Michelle stated enthusiastically.

Channing was her college sweetheart turned fiancé. The two of them were, as Mary Poppins put it, ‘practically perfect in every way.’ I groaned. She chirped on. “Which reminds me, he is also very fit and Channing said he never flirts when he is at the gym so no wandering eyes issues.”

“So.” I stated as I lifted my hand to count the facts. “Good job. Ambitious. No obvious red flags. Handsome. A good personality. Sounds terrifying.” I stated sarcastically. “Why is he single?”

Michelle was used to my suspicious nature at this point. As proud owner of Diana’s Investigative Services, I saw a lot and knew better than anyone that everyone is hiding something. In their mind, in their locked drawer or even in their car.

“Why is he single? Well, I didn’t ask him that.” Michelle scoffed. “I mean, I know you love interrogating… Ah, I mean asking questions and doing all of your body language & vocal analyzation P.I. mumbo jumbo. So, I saved that question for you.” She smiled sweetly.

I frowned. I still wasn’t raring to go. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy the company of a man, but I had gotten so used to being “friend- zoned.” The category of people that, are told, “You’re not my type.” “I don’t see you that way.” “You are going to make someone a great spouse one day.” “You are like family.” After hearing that a time or five, you get used to playing it safe. For me that meant not getting excited about the possibilities. That meant focusing on what I could control. That meant creating a new normal and finding ways to make my life full and enjoyable, sans a beau. From solo road trips to building my business, there was no time to think about dating. So, if it wasn’t broke, why fix it? This bestie takeover in the form of a date was changing my operatus mundi for the last 3 years! Was I ready for that?

“Diiiii!” Michelle screamed my nickname, snapping me out of my reverie and back to the present day.

“What? Why are you yelling?” I yelled back.

“Because I’ve been asking you to look up so I can apply your lower lid eye liner for the last 10 seconds.” She exclaimed. “What were you thinking about?”

“Sorry” I mumbled. “I was thinking about ways to get out of this date, or ways to leave early when I get there.”

“Very funny” she stated sarcastically as she finished the last touches on my lips and handed me a mirror.

“I’m being very serio-" I stopped mid-sentence. I couldn’t believe how I looked. What a great job she had done. My confidence shot up like a rocket. The smoky eye and plum lip combined with my charcoal grey sweater dress and black knee-high boots was quite the combo. I also intentionally didn’t straighten my thick and curly hair. It would either serve to ward off a man that wanted a certain “look,” or it would allow him to get bonus points for appreciating my coif.

“You were saying?” Michelle couldn’t help but tease me. “But seriously, you look great. So, no getting out of it. No reason to. I know you already expect the worst so there’s nothing to lose.”

As I was preparing to rebuttal, the rideshare app notification dinged, alerting me that my driver was downstairs. I decided to leave Winter, my affectionate name for my white Chevy, at home. My mind was all over place and I didn’t want to have to bother with paying attention to the road.

“Well, ready or not here I go.” I silently hugged my bestie, grabbed my purse and headed for my elevator.

As I grabbed the door handle Michelle suddenly shouted, “Hey! You forgot something.”

I turned back to face her while simultaneously checking my clutch and pockets for my keys, my phone, my wallet and my pepper spray. I looked up at her with a question mark in my eyes.

“Your fun chip. You’ll need that if you’re going to have a good time.” She smiled and threw an imaginary chip at me.

I couldn’t resist. I caught it, blew her a kiss and finally rushed out the door.

***

The reservations were at 7:00pm but my driver made great time and I arrived at the restaurant at 6:45pm. I was happy to arrive early. It would give me a chance to study the menu, study my surroundings and calm my nerves.

“Reservation for two under Roberts.” I stated to the hostess, providing Warren’s last name. “Also, I’m early so-”

“Actually, your table is ready and the other person in your party is already seated so, right this way.” The young and bubbly hosted stepped out from behind the hostess stand and led the way.

As I followed her, I couldn’t help but be shocked, but I shouldn’t have been. This was very on brand behavior for an INFJ Personality type. Plus, being early was much better than being late. Or worse, being stood up. Both of which I had experienced in my life B.C. Which in my case stood for “Before Chill-Mode.”

This restaurant was bigger than I realized. The décor reminded me of an enchanted forest. There were earth tones and large plants which could create a lot of cover. It was obviously a place you could go if you wanted privacy or even secrecy. Stop thinking like a P.I., I thought to myself. I needed to adjust my fun chip and turn off the paranoia. Warren didn’t deserve that. So, I pushed those thoughts aside as we finally approached a round booth.

The man sitting there was, well, dark and beautiful. There was no other way to describe it. As he began to stand to greet me, I quickly amended my mental description to add, tall. His smile revealed gorgeous teeth and the fact that he wasn’t trying to be too cool for school.

“Diana?” He questioned.

“Yes and you must be Warren?” I confirmed.

“Nice to meet you.” We said in unison.

The hostess, beaming at them as if she were a proud parent or cupid witnessing their work, stated “Your server will be here shortly. Enjoy your dining experience.”

“Thank you.” We both chimed in perfect unison again.

We laughed, both seemingly grateful for the ice breaker.

“Please have a seat.” He gestured to the right of him.

I noticed he had taken the position that allowed him to have the best view of the small opening that faced the front of the restaurant. I preferred that position so that I could see everything. But since I was not there for work, I begrudgingly took the seat he offered.

“Thank you and this is a great place you chose,” I politely stated. “I have been wanting to try this place for a while.”

“I’m glad you like it. I almost feel like it picked itself.” he muttered cryptically.

Fighting the urge to ask him what he meant by that, I grabbed the menu to distract myself and thought of a quick harmless reply. “Oh really? I love when that happens.”

“Yeah.. ah, thank you for meeting me tonight.” His robust voice boomed in my ear. When I heard about you, I knew I had to meet you.”

I was about to ask him what he had heard when the server appeared seemingly from out of nowhere. “Hello and welcome to Andersons. I'm Brian and I will be your server tonight. May I start you off with a cocktail?”

Warren answered, “I'm just going to start with water for now and you, Diana?”

I perused the drink selections and just for the sheer fact that I needed something to calm my nerves, I opted to go with an oldie but goody: a lemon drop. “I will have an ice water no lemon and I will also have a lemon drop.” I stated as I handed the server the drink menu.

“Perfect.” Brian responded. “I will get those put in at the bar you and I will be back for your appetizer order.”

As the server walked away, I noticed Warren looking in the direction of the server. I couldn't tell if he was looking at the server specifically or just people watching the guests that were coming up to the hostess stand. I just made my mental notes, as I can’t turn off all my instincts, and continued the conversation. “So, are you not a drinker? No judgment here if so. I respect that a lot, if that is the case.”

He replied, “I'm not a big drinker. I do drink socially but I wanted to have a clear mind tonight.”

That was fine I supposed. Maybe he just didn't want to get sloppy on their first date. “Oh, OK I completely understand that. By the way you look great. I love your ensemble and we kind of match.” I knew I was being corny, but I had to say something.

He politely chuckled in reply, “Yeah I noticed that.”

Ouch. I felt so beautiful leaving the house, but I definitely noticed that he did not say that I looked great in return. At 5’ 5”, 180 proportioned pounds with a button nose, I knew I wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea. I was guessing already that I wasn't attractive to him.

And that, I thought to myself, is the safety in not getting your hopes up. This could, however, still could be an enjoyable evening I purposed. Refocusing, I gave him a cheerily “Thank you!” I could really use that lemon drop right about now.

And in an abrupt change of subject he said, “So, Michelle tells me you are a private investigator. I think that is very fascinating.”

I froze for a second. It's not that my career was a secret, but I certainly didn't publicize it for a number of reasons. But I was glad he was at least asking questions so I answered, “Yes, I have had my own private investigation firm for about 5 years now. I focus on commercial clients though rather than individuals.” I quickly shifted the conversation back to him. “And Michelle told me that you are an actor and an accountant? What an interesting combo!”

Did I detect disappointment in his face? If I did, he quickly hid it.

“Yes, I actually double majored in college and got my BA in business and my BFA in performing arts. I like numbers and I like the creative outlet of acting. I knew working as an accountant that I wouldn't have to worry about being a starving artist in between gigs.” And before I could reply to that he continued by asking, “So, why not any private clients?”

“Well, the money is better in commercial.” I answered honestly. “Also, there's only so much work available in catching cheating spouses. Plus, it's kind of sad realizing how many people cheat.” I noticed while I was answering him that he began fidgeting with his menu. Was he nervous? I wondered. That in combination with the fact that he looked towards the front of the restaurant for the 4^th time and kept checking his watch, led me to a hard yes.

I was pretty sure that our being in a relationship was off the table but now my spidey senses were up. What was up with this guy? I wondered.

We had just ordered our appetizers, some firecracker shrimp and spring egg rolls, when I decided I would just ask him outright, “Hey, you seem a little distracted. Is everything OK?”

“It’s that obvious huh?” He faintly laughed.

“Well maybe not for most but considering what I do for a living, it's my job to notice these types of things.”

“I'm just a little nervous.” He replied. “It's been a while since I have been out with a woman other than family or my…” He paused. “My ex.”

“Ohh, I understand.” I replied although I really didn’t understand. “Are you freshly out of a relationship?”

As soon as I asked that question, I followed his eyes towards a couple that was being escorted by the same bubbly hostess over to the section in an adjacent dining section, right by a large frond plant. I immediately saw pain in his eyes.

“Yes, very fresh.” He stated with disdain in his voice. For the first time that night, he turned towards me. “It's time I come clean about why I asked Michelle to arrange for us to meet up tonight.”

I subconsciously turned away from him to face forward. I knew it. I was going to kill Michelle. I gestured for him to continue. “I'm listening.”

“So, the thing is, I'm married.” He said almost begrudgingly.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to slap him, I wanted to call Michelle and cuss her out; and Channing too for that matter because how do you not know your gym buddy is married? I had heard enough, and I reached to grab my purse. He touched my arm, and I pulled it away. “Don't touch me, married man.” I reprimanded him. “Why would you use my friends to help you find a rebound?”

“No. That's not it at all!” He continued. “Please, let me explain. So, two days before I came by Channing and Michelle’s, I learned my wife maybe having an affair on me.” He looked at Diana as if asking for permission to continue.

I did not respond or look at him. But I didn’t leave or stop him. He took that as enough permission and plunged forward. “I came home from work early and I heard her on the phone. Her voice was flirty. And it sounded like she was making plans for dinner with someone. Here. Tonight. At 7:30pm. I didn't want to confront her because I knew if I did, she would either deny it or destroy any proof. You see, my wife is an attorney and she's very shrewd.”

Everything started coming together. His looking towards the front of the restaurant. His checking his watch. His calling this a meeting instead of a date. His choice not to drink. His body language seeming like he wasn't attracted to me. But I still had a few more questions. Fun chip gone. Interrogation chip activated.

“So, you thought your wife maybe cheating and you decided to prepare to cheat back as soon as it was confirmed? Or you brought me here, so you didn't have to find out the truth alone? Or am I a decoy, here for you to pretend you took a dinner meeting so it wouldn't be obvious that you're spying?” I started raising my voice, so I lowered it and yelled in a whisper, “Why am I here?”

He took a deep breath and looked at my straight in the eyes. “You're here because I knew if she showed up with a guy I didn’t recognize, then my suspicions would have been correct. I knew this would be a huge opportunity to get proof of infidelity for the divorce proceedings in real time. You're here because I want to hire you starting right now.”

I fell back in my seat at the realization that my first date in three years wasn't a date at all. It was a consultation for a new P.I. client.

At the same time, I was relieved. Deceitful though it may have been, I was just happy that it wasn't another rejection. I was happy that I had an answer. Admittedly, this wouldn't be as much preparation work as one of my regular cases because I usually had to do much more: surveillance, stake outs, researching schedules, interviews and so on, before I could find the subject. In this case, that part was already done. The evidence was in the room. All I had to do was follow her and the suspected manstress. Plus, Warren genuinely seemed like a nice guy. Women that don't appreciate the good ones frankly pissed me off. Having made my decision, I finished off my lemon drop, looked at him directly for the first time and said with a twinkle in my eye, “Well I hope your acting and accounting career have been going well because I don't come cheap.”

The pain in his eyes mixed with instant relief. We quickly talked numbers, he paid my retainer, and we discreetly headed out the side entrance. Time was of the essence so I advised that it would be best that instead of waiting on a rideshare, he would take me home to quickly grab my equipment and I would head back up to the restaurant to wait for the “lovely couple” to finish their meal and follow them to their next destination, chasing proof. As I stared out the window of his silver Chevy all I could think was, Winter and I were going to have another long night.