We’re All Grownups Here!

(Write a story in which two people who know each other are introduced — but neither person admits to knowing the other.)

The only way I can describe it is to say that it was the worst moment of my life.  

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I had finally gotten up my confidence, and with it enough nerve to actually put my money and my skills on the line for a ten day Photo Adventure Excursion to Iceland.  

I was excited beyond description and totally preoccupied with checking my photography equipment. I was trying to decide how much stuff I wanted to drag around with me, it gets heavy when you hang all that crap on your body. How exerting were the hikes on the glaciers and rugged terrain. What did I really need?

I was a firm believer that seeing with the eye of an artist comes first, then the best equipment you can afford for the job at hand, then luck and a little time spent in post processing.

I had paid my registration fees and sent along my images and then waited to be accepted. It wasn’t as though it was a really tough thing to be accepted but neither did the professional hosting the event want a raw beginner, that would not be fair to himself or to the other attendees, the need to babysit someone while others waited.  

I’m getting off track here, just suffice to say….I applied, was accepted, paid my money and now I just needed to get myself to Iceland on the proper date, and at the assigned time. Take the best gear I could beg, borrow or steal, and let my joy shine through in my images.

But again I need to back up and fill in more detail.

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I have always enjoyed photography and lucked out taking decent photos that were mostly limited by my equipment. So for Christmas one year my husband bought me an exceptionally nice camera. I added a couple lenses and I was off and enjoying a whole new world of loveliness. Birds, butterflies, dragonflies, macro shots all lived on our land so I could step out my door and boom...there were enviable images.  

I found a couple photography groups on social media to share information and images and I was in photo heaven. It is so gratifying to be asked how you got the shot, settings and gear, time of day, the discussions were endless. Soon I had regular friends and we had friendly little challenges...go out and shoot something “red”, or just the word “sky”, or cityscape...that is how I got involved with Doug.

We were fairly evenly matched equipment wise so the competition became personal in an artistic or creative way. Oh, I so admired him! He was very very good! He stimulated me in my whole approach to the challenges. We talked every evening. The evenings became longer and longer. We were sharing more than photography. We were sharing thoughts, worries, jobs, dreams and wishes. Just about any subject.

As often happens when you connect with someone who shares your vision of fun and fantasy and wishes, somehow the real person you live with seems more and more colorless and boring. Doug became a rock star in my mind. He could do it all!

And so began our late night romance. Joking at first and then finally admitting to myself that I more than wanted to see him every night, I needed to see him every night.  

You might ask how a long distance relationship could ever be better that having a loving husband warm and human next to me but I guarantee you, mentally, in your mind and imagination, you can generate such passionate thoughts, such reality that your heart rate changes and your breathing might quicken. Hmmm, the words were delicious. My mind and body were ripe to receive every suggestion.

And so I hiked my fields and hills looking for images to impress him. I wanted him to admire me as I was beginning to almost worship him. Such skill, such talent and such a lover. We shared every intimacy! I am embarrassed this second as I write this but it happened.

What also happened is Catherine!  Her profile photo showed a young blonde with lovely skin, big eyes and a fair amount of camera skills. She messaged me to ask about the settings of a recent moon shot of mine. We chatted on and off for a few days before she began telling me how helpful and friendly that guy Doug had become, she giggled, he was a huge inspiration! 

Wow! Now I began to wonder how many of us Doug was coaching for his own pleasures!   

Foolish? Crap, it was worse than that, I felt utterly stupid! Was I so needy that I fell for some smooth line? It became apparent after some subtle inquiries that Doug was mining the group for receptive women...how had I become a receptive woman? I left the group and never looked back. I was glad Catherine had chatted with me as I had no idea.  

~~~~~

Well back to the present and shaking my head out of the stupor of the flight to Iceland. The speakers announced the weather appeared good, with a chuckle, for Iceland, we would be arriving in about ten minutes. On arrival, a shuttle would take us to the lodge where we would be staying when not out on the glacier and mountains. Terrific waterfalls and natural wonders awaited us each day. 

Tonight a welcome dinner. I was pumped! Somewhere in the back of my mind I was praying I was good enough to fit in with the group and maybe, even possibly capture something to be admired.

The lodge was lovely! And as the visions in your mind may conger up, it was rustic and lovely but with every known convenience. We would want for nothing, no wonder it was so expensive.

I was exhausted and running on fumes but also looking forward to cocktails and dinner with a slide show of where we were headed in the morning. Hints on how to dress, footwear, and of course, camera talk.

We were greeted by our host and ushered into the great room where a luscious buffet table had been laid. As we gathered around the table, I was checking out the other attendees and I thought one fellow looked familiar but I couldn’t quite place him.

Our host went around the table introducing each of us with a few words he had gleaned from our applications. I felt my head almost snap around when I heard Doug’s name. I couldn’t believe it! My eyes were still glued on him as my name was read, Doug did not look up, did not look at me or acknowledge me at all.

I had that feeling in my stomach like looking down from a tower and feeling disoriented or having a falling sensation, my stomach turned over.

I excused myself from the table blaming jet lag and went quickly to my room. How could I spend ten days like this, feeling sick, embarrassed and stupid.  

I opened a tiny bottle of brandy from the small bar in my room, poured it over ice, and sipped it while I tried to come up with a plan.  

I wanted this adventure, to shoot Iceland, to take home memories, enjoyable memories and so I said to myself…

”Self, we are not going to let some foolishness rob us of this joy! We will avoid him as much as possible! Look through him as though he isn’t there! But never let him think we feel anything but disgust for him!” “He doesn’t exist!”

The ten days went so quickly, I learned so much, I fit in nicely, it was near perfect!

I did see Doug glom onto a middle age redhead and that was really perfect.  

For about three seconds I wondered if I should warn her, but then I decided,

We’re all grownups here!!