See Clearly

I can see it now.

See what?

It.

What is it?

What’s up ahead?

Where ahead?

Ahead. In the tunnel. 

I don’t see a tunnel.

Look. It’s there.

Where?

Up ahead.

Well, I can’t see anything. Not a tunnel and not whatever is in it.

Open your eyes!

They are open. And there’s nothing there.

Are you trying to fool me with that old line?

What old line.

You know the one I’m talking about.

No, I don’t, actually.

It’s the one that goes there’s no there there.

Huh?

Yes, it was a famous line.

Whose line was it, anyway?

I’m pretty sure Gertrude Stein came up with it.

What did she mean by it?

She was referring to her childhood home in California. I think.

 But California still exists.

Maybe so, but her home wasn’t there any more when she wrote that.

When did she write it?

In 1937, in Everybody’s Autobiography.

Everybody can’t have the same autobiography. That’s crazy.

Gertrude was a pretty smart woman.

If you say so. Anyway, I still don’t see anything up ahead.

You really can’t see the tunnel?

Nope.

That’s kind of like not being able to see the forest for the trees.

We were talking about a tunnel, not trees.

I know, but maybe we’re in the tunnel and that’s why you can’t see it. Like if we were in a forest.

I doubt that, but have it your way.

Thank you. So can you believe me that I can see it now?

I guess I’ll have to take your word for it. But can you tell me one thing at least?

Yes, of course.

What is it you can see now? I obviously don’t have as good eyesight as you do.

Well, maybe you need to think about the type of tunnel we’re in.

Type of tunnel? There is more than one type?

Yes, of course. There are three basic types of tunnels, depending on how they’re built.

I’m not an expert on tunnel construction. Perhaps you could explain?

Certainly. The three types that are commonly built are: first, the cut-and-cover tunnel…

You lost me already…

That’s the type that’s constructed in a shallow trench and covered over afterward. 

I never knew tunnels were built in trenches. Sounds counterproductive to dig down, then build up.

They do it all the time. Think about it.

All right, I guess that was tunnel vision on my part…

(Groan)

So what about the second type?

That would be a bored tunnel.

Bored? Well, yes, I suppose if I were a tunnel, always stuck in the same place, I’d get bored, too.

(Groan)

Sorry. Guess I’m having a bad humor day…

All right. A bored tunnel is on that’s built or drilled in situ. It’s made with removing the ground or stone above. 

That makes sense. I’ve seen lots of tunnels bored through mountains. It must be very hard work. Scary, too. You couldn’t pay me enough to do it.

I wasn’t planning to pay you to carve a tunnel out of solid rock.

That’s a relief. Anyway, I wouldn’t know what shape to make it.

Bored tunnels are usually circular or in the shape of a horseshoe sliced in half.

I wonder who decided on that shape?

Irrelevant, but they do have another name…

Do I need to know it?

No, but it’s sometimes called a sealed tunnel.

TMI.

All right, don’t get cranky.

I’m not, but we haven’t gotten to the third type.

You’re right! The third type is called an immersed tube tunnel.

Ohhhh, I bet I know what that is. It’s probably constructed under a body of water.

Something like that.

I knew it! But we’re not immersed in anything are we?

No, silly. That’s just how this type of tunnel made. Plus, there are at least four other classifications of tunnels…

Spare me.

All right. However, I can see something now and am really hoping your eyes have grown accustomed to the dark. That way maybe you can see it too.

Sorry, not happening.

Have you ever heard the song, “I can see clearly now”?

The one sung by Johnny Nash or the Jimmy Cliff version?

I prefer Jimmy Cliff, but the lyrics are the same: “I can see clearly now the rain is gone. I can see all obstacles in my way.”

It isn’t raining. Especially inside this tunnel you say we’re in.

Obviously. That was the song.

And the obstacles? Please don’t tell me there’s a train coming!

Of course not. We’d already be squashed.

You’re right. It’s just a song. Why did you even bring it up?

Because I can see it now and that reminded me of the lyrics.

What can you see? You still haven’t explained it to me.

I’m getting to that.

But I’m completely in the dark.

Well, we are in a tunnel, after all.

I am aware of that. What I am not aware of is what you can see that I can’t. It doesn’t seem fair for you to be holding out on me. Aren’t we friends? What are you waiting for?

Do you really want to go there?

Oh my God, I don’t want to go anywhere except out of this place we’re in. I’m waiting for your answer so I can see where we’re going.

Did you say you’re waiting for Godot?

Oh God.

Not God. I said Godot. Are you waiting for him?

Obviously not. You brought Godot up. I don’t even remember who created him.

Not Gertrude.

I know it wasn’t Gertrude.

But do you know it was Beckett?

Now I do.

And do you know Vladimir and Estragon waited and waited for Godot?

That’s kind of obvious, given the play’s title. Also it’s kind of creepy, considering how long you’ve kept me waiting to find out what you can see that I still can’t. 

Maybe I’m making it up.

Maybe you are. If so, it’s not fair. Plus, Beckett already wrote the play and you shouldn’t try to plagiarize him.

I’m not. All I said was I could see it now. Besides, as you may recall, Vladimir and Estragon were near a tree and we’ve already established that this is not a forest, it’s a tunnel.

Which doesn’t make me feel much better, by the way.

I was just clarifying.

No, not really. You’re keeping me in the dark. 

Maybe you’re blind, like María’s husband.

María? Who’s María?

You know. María Iribarne, who was married to Allende, who was blind.

Where was that? I certainly don’t know anybody by that name.

In Buenos Aires.

Whoa! That’s a long ways from here.

Do you know where we are?

No, not really.

Then don’t be so sure. Anyway, Castel, the painter who killed María, lived a dark, lonely life of obsession. You know, like a…

Don’t tell me.

Anyway, I am not blind, except here, where everything is pitch black. Because it is.

No, it’s not. Because I can see it. Maybe you should be worried.

I am worried, but not about my eyesight, about you.

But think of the Bible and Job.

I haven’t read the Bible.

Then how about Ayn Rand’s “Anthem?”

Nope.

I see…

I got that already. You can see it, but I can’t. That’s how we got here.

All right, maybe you’ve read Stephen King? Everybody has read something of his. In The Stand, the character Larry tries to get through the Lincoln Tunnel.

Is that where we are?

No, of course not.

Then why bring up Stephen King? He terrifies me.

You mean his writing terrifies you, not the man.

I’ll be the judge of that.

Maybe it would help if you thought about children’s stories, which have lots of tunnels and caves.

Caves? Oh no! I’m definitely not going there.

But I can give you scads of examples…

No and no.

Well, how about some feminism to soothe your fears?

Huh?

You know, Virginia Woolf?

What does she have to do with where we are? Or where we might be, because I don’t have a clue, as you well know.

Woolf said she used ‘tunneling’ to get inside her characters when she wrote.

That sounds more like what maggots do.

Not the same. Not at all. Woolf wanted to go deep into her characters’ psyches so she could create depth for them. Everybody knows she was a great writer.

Maybe so, but you seem to have forgotten something.

What’s that?

I am not Virginia Woolf or any of those other writers. I’m not a writer at all, in fact. Maybe you are, but I’m not. I’m just somebody who’s your friend. Or who used to be your friend.

What? Now you’re angry with me? Just because I can see it and you can’t?

No. Because I don’t care what is.

Why not?

Because I have claustrophobia and need to get out of here, fast. You should be able to understand that, if you’re my friend as you say you are.

Am I?

Are you what?

Your friend.

You decide, but be quick about it!

All right, just give me a minute.

This is hell…

No, it’s just a tunnel.

Which is too much like a cave…

Which reminds me. We haven’t even talked about Plato…

Nor do we need to. 

Yes we do. Just think about it.

I’m too tired to think, but go ahead.

Well, Plato said: “We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”

I’m sure he meant people, not just men.

Right. So you’re a feminist after all.

Not the point. Just get to your point.

All right. Here goes: I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Oh thank God. Or Godot. Or Plato. Or Woolf. I’m out of here!