I Am Not Your Friend

Frederick Gilligan ordered a small chocolate milkshake. He took his receipt and leaned against the wall behind the line of customers. Number 53. The workers finished his order quickly and called his number. A young man named Jeffery Kidd with messy blonde hair walked in as Frederick collected his frozen beverage. Jeffery wore a jean jacket and black sweatpants to go with a pair of red sneakers.

“I thought you were going to wait for me.”

Frederick did not face his companion. “We agreed to get something to eat at 11:30. I placed my order at 11:30.”

Jeffery did not know how to respond. He just rolled his eyes and placed his order for a cheeseburger with medium fries and a medium soda. Frederick went on his own to find a table.

“How have you been?” Jeffery asked once the two of them reunited at the chosen table.

“I have been doing well. As always.”

“I don’t know how you could be a psychopath and lead a fulfilling life. I mean, would it be possible to ‘do well’ with a lack of emotion?”

“Just because I am not susceptible to normal people’s emotional limitations does not mean that I cannot find fulfillment.”

Jeffery struggled with the lid on the plastic container of dipping sauce. “But aren’t they linked?”

“It depends on how you view it. It is a natural instinct for most people to view things how they would like to see them. In this case as well as many others, people would choose the option that appears most simple. That is why you pair these ideas under the umbrella topic of ‘emotion’, even when you know that emotion is incredibly complex. One view of psychopathy is that it is carelessness about ‘normal behavior’, which is a nonsense topic all on its own. This would label you as a psychopath though due to your strange action of fully buttoning your jean jacket.”

Jeffery scoffed through a mouthful of french fries. “There’s nothing wrong with how I wear jean jackets.”

Frederick raised his eyebrows and took a sip of his milkshake.

“I hate it when you do that.” Jeffery accused, no longer with food in his mouth.

“When I do what?”

“You make that ‘oh really’ face to contradict me. It’s like a… a kind of sarcasm or something.”

“Perhaps you were needing a contradiction then.”

“Whatever.”

The two of them completed their quick meal and left the building as two others walked inside. They caught only a portion of the conversation as they passed.

One woman was saying to the other, “...act like you don’t care Judith, but I think you’re hiding…”

The following day was a Monday, meaning that Judith Chambers and her coworker, Kayla Hodges were to meet at the front door of the office fifteen minutes early. It was Judith’s first day on the job and Kayla had been assigned to help her with the processes of how the office was run. Both arrived a few minutes before the designated time.

They left towards the area where Judith would receive her employee badge, with Kayla supplying the grand majority of the conversation along the way. They encountered Jeffery Kidd, who took Judith’s picture. She didn’t really smile for it, but it worked. Frederick came in after the photo and noticed the group. He knew of Kayla but had never had any interest in getting to know her. To be honest, there were no people here that he had truly cared about getting to know. But Kayla stood out somehow.

Kayla noticed Frederick walking in and grinned. “Hey Frederick, this is Judith, the new employee.”

They shook hands.

“Psycho.” Frederick mumbled.

“Socio.” Judith mumbled.

The two other coworkers did not know what had been said, but all they could do is look at each other and shrug. This was simply the start of a peculiar dynamic.

The conversation continued in the breakroom at lunch.

“Do you have plans yet to manipulate her?” Jeremy asked. “There was something that you noticed about her. What was it?”

“What I saw was that I would get nowhere with that sort of manipulation.”

Jeremy smirked. “Is she too smart for you?”

“Intelligence is far more complex than people like you believe it to be. She is a sociopath, so it was easy for us to come to a mutual agreement.”

“When was this agreement? You hardly said anything.”

“Hardly anything needed to be said.”

“I don’t get you.”

“I already know that.”

“You know what? I think you like her.”

“I do not like her.”

“That’s what you would say if you were trying to manipulate me into thinking you don’t like her.”

“I am a psychopath. I do not like anyone.”

“What about me?”

“Nope. You are here for my benefit.”

“So what’s the difference between a psychopath and a sociopath?” Kayla asked.

Judith finished her sandwich. “A psychopath’s conditions are caused internally. A sociopath’s conditions are caused by the surroundings.”

“Aren’t sociopaths supposed to be uncaring? Why would one be an employee for a business then?”

Judith rolled her eyes. “I can care about myself and have a job. The job supports my financial well-being.”

“Huh. Well with the stigmatization of psychopaths and sociopaths I’m surprised you were hired.”

“Some employers are willing to hire people with disorders as long as they are aware of the situation. More importantly, they want to avoid being accused of discrimination.”

“Does it suck sometimes to know you have a disorder?”

“Disorders are a social construct based on the lies of what is considered normal even when no one abides by these rules anyway. It is unbelievably easy to convince someone that you are insane. However, it is next to impossible to then convince them that you are sane.”

“Huh.”

Judith: They think we should get together.

Frederick: Ridiculous.

Judith: They should know by now that would never work.

Frederick: I never understand how people get into manipulative relationships and then call people like us abnormal. At least they are not aware of our collaboration.

Of course Frederick would say out loud that he had no plans to manipulate Judith. He knew Judith had ideas to betray him as well. But each of them would have counters and at the moment each of them would have to wait for an opening and maintain the appearance of being… friends.