3 comments
Lonely Together
Wednesday 18th April 2020
Danny: Hello from Dubai!!!!! (14:30)
Amber: Lol, hello from our house. (14:31)
Amber: Just as exciting as Dubai. (14:31)
Danny: Lol (14:32)
Danny: Well as nice as Dubai is, it doesn’t have you in it. (14:33)
Amber: Awww, I miss you too. (14:34)
Danny: I hate that you couldn’t get out of work earlier. (14:34)
Danny: Amber??? (14:46)
Amber: Sorry, sorry, sending emails whoops. But you know, it is what is. (14:47)
Danny: Mm (14:47)
Amber: Don’t you worry, I’m gonna hop on the next flight and before you know it, we’ll be lounging on the beach together, sipping mojitos, wondering how I ever let you date me for three years. (14:49)
Danny: Easy, no one can resist my beautiful gaze. (14:50)
Amber: That and your modesty. (14:51)
Danny: Are you packed? (14:52)
Amber: Not yet. But I will. (14:53)
Danny: If you’re sure. (14:54)
Amber: I am. (14:54)
Amber: Have you see your sister yet? (14:56)
Danny: Not yet. She’s working today. (14:57)
Amber: Still? I wouldn’t have seen parking as an essential job lol. (14:58)
Danny: Yeah well we can’t all be actuaries… (15:00)
Amber: That’s not what I meant. It was a joke. (15:01)
Danny: I know. (15:03)
Danny: Guess I’m just a bit stressed. With everything going on. (15:05)
Amber: With your job you mean? (15:06)
Danny: I meant the world lol (15:07)
Danny: But that too. (15:07)
Amber: Have you asked about getting your job back? (15:08)
Danny: Amber, they had me train the replacement, no way they take me back. (15:10)
Amber: You should at least try. (15:10)
Danny: Yeah, okay. (15:12)
Amber: Great. (15:12)
Amber: I need to get back to work. See you tomorrow. (15:13)
Danny: See you then. I love you. (15:14)
Amber: I love you too. (15:14)
Thursday 19th April 2020
Amber: DANNY WAKE UP! (07:32)
Danny: Amber! I thought you would be on a plane by now! (11:33)
Amber: I can’t get in. (11:33)
Danny: What do you mean? (11:34)
Amber: The UAE isn’t accepting residents anymore. (11:35)
Danny: What??? Since when??? (11:35)
Amber: This morning (11:36)
Danny: What? (11:36)
Amber: LITERALLY! (11:36)
Amber: They announced it at like 4AM your time and now I can’t get in. (11:37)
Danny: I told you to come earlier! (11:37)
Amber: How was I supposed to know this would happen? (11:38)
Danny: Obviously not what I meant. (11:38)
Amber: So what did you mean? (11:39)
Danny: I just mean that if you went when I told you to, we wouldn’t be in this situation. (11:41)
Amber: I know but I had to work. It’s not like I had a choice. (11:41)
Danny: Your work comes first, I get it. (11:42)
Amber: Not what I meant all. (11:42)
Danny: Oh. (11:44)
Amber: Is that how you feel? That I put my job first? (11:45)
Danny: No, I don’t. (11:46)
Amber: The only reason I’ve been working so hard is because of how close I am to that promotion. (11:47)
Danny: I know. (11:47)
Amber: But you know you’re more important to me than my job, right? (11:48)
Danny: Yeah, I do. (11:49)
Amber: Good. (11:49)
Amber: Okay, I’m gonna work on getting over to you. (11:50)
Danny: Cool. (11:51)
Danny: I’ll see if I can do anything on my end. (11:51)
Amber: Great. I love you. (11:52)
Danny: Love you too. (11:52)
Tuesday 24th April 2020
Danny: Free to talk now? (17:40)
Danny: You didn’t call. (17:41)
Danny: Or answer my call. (17:41)
Amber: So sorry babe, I’ll be done in like twenty minutes. Can I call you back then? (18:04)
Danny: That’s what you said twenty-five minutes ago. (18:05)
Amber: Sooooooo sorry! Busy past couple days. (18:07)
Danny: Same here. (18:07)
Amber: Oh? (18:08)
Amber: You guys on lockdown yet? (18:08)
Danny: Not yet. But staying in jic. (18:09)
Amber: Smart. What you been up to? (18:11)
Danny: Trying to get you here. (18:12)
Amber: Right. (18:13)
Amber: Any luck? (18:13)
Danny: Nope. You? (18:14)
Amber: Neither. (18:15)
Danny: We could do an anniversary zoom call or something? Any ideas? (18:16)
Danny: Amber? (18:23)
Danny: Amber???? (18:32)
Amber: Sorry. Busy. (18:33)
Amber: Can you just call me in an hour? Swear I’ll be done by then. (18:35)
Danny: Already really late here. (18:36)
Danny: Can’t your work wait? (18:36)
Amber: Not really (18:37)
Danny: Why? (18:38)
Amber: Because this isn’t a great time for job stability so I can’t slack off rn. (18:39)
Amber: Espc because you don’t have a job. (18:39)
Danny: Well I wouldn’t have quit if I knew a pandemic was gonna shoot all my travel plans to hell. (18:40)
Amber: I know, that’s not what I meant. (18:40)
Amber: Did you ask about getting your job back? (18:43)
Danny: No. (18:44)
Amber: Why not? (18:44)
Danny: Because it’s pointless. (18:45)
Amber: You are so bloody reckless Danny, honestly! You bought plane tickets in the middle of a bleeding PANDEMIC!!! What is so bad about working? If not for me we’d literally be homeless! (18:47)
Danny: I don’t have a problem with your job but it is all you do! I just wanted twenty minutes of your time and you couldn’t even give me that! If you had just come when I asked then at least we would be together! (18:48)
Amber: Maybe if you tried harder to come back you could be here? (18:49)
Danny: What if you tried at all? (18:49)
Amber: I think we need a break. (18:59)
Danny: What? (19:00)
Amber: Yeah. We need a break. (19:01)
Amber: I need a break. (19:02)
Tuesday 31st April 2020
Amber: Hey. (11:12)
Danny: Hey. (11:12)
Danny: I wanted to call but… (11:13)
Amber: I know. (11:13)
Amber: Me too. (11:13)
Danny: What’s up? (11:14)
Amber: I’ve never gone this long without talking to you before. (11:15)
Danny: I missed you too. (11:15)
Amber: I’m sorry. (11:16)
Amber: I shouldn’t have said any of that stuff last time. I didn’t mean it. I was just angry and overreacting. (11:16)
Danny: I don’t blame you. I wasn’t being helpful either. I’m sorry too. I know you love your job and you shouldn’t feel like you have to sacrifice it for me. (11:17)
Amber: But you were right. I was putting my job first. (11:18)
Amber: I should be able to have a conversation with my boyfriend without trying to calculate the weekly financial loss caused by Covid-19. (11:19)
Danny: Haha (11:19)
Danny: I really wish I was sitting beside you and not knowing what you’re talking about. (11:20)
Amber: …might be possible (11:21)
Danny: What? (11:21)
Amber: Did some further research and it certifiably impossible for me to join you over there. (11:22)
Danny: But? (11:22)
Amber: But I could get you here. (11:23)
Danny: What??? How??? (11:24)
Amber: You can’t fly directly from there to England. But you can fly to Portugal. Portugal to England is easy enough and you’re back in my arms before you can say Coronavirus. (11:25)
Danny: Do I have the smartest girlfriend ever or what? (11:26)
Amber: Yeah, you do. Happy anniversary, Danny. (11:28)
Danny: Happy anniversary babe. I love you. (11:29)
Amber: I love you too. (11:29)
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3 comments
I attempted to write a story using only text messages, but found that it was a lot harder than I ever imagined it would be. I found your conversation to be believable, and all in all, you did a good job. If I might make a suggestion, this story might have been even better with a little greater insight into the characters. Enjoyable read!
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Reedsy suggested I critique your story as part of the critique circle. I liked the simplicity of the story. I actually find the format of a text/ facebook message clever. As as a screenwriter i sort of reminded me of a screenplay in a fun way. The only detractions is that it got little monotonous, there was nothing particulary gripping, or compelling that you hold onto as you finished. That being said, it was still a simple, cleverly formed story with a clear direction, that was enjoyable to read. -E-
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Pleasantly simple and a real fun read! Good job!
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