This is just the Beginning!

Tik tik tik tik ! “Nope”….. Tringgggggggg “Delete”.

Tik tik tik tik tik tik ! “Nope”…...Tringgggggggggggg “Delete”.

This is the sound of me typing and deleting on my computer off and on. I’m not sure how many times I have done it, but trust me, I know I have done it quite a number of times.

Arggggg!……It’s so difficult!

Why is it so difficult for me to even start this story? How should I start? What am I going to write about? Oh My God! I have no idea at all.

Should I really be part of this writing community? Am I really capable of writing?

Should I or should I not submit my story?

Argggggg!….. It’s so complicated man!

Why did I even get this idea to write in the 1st place?

It has been like ages since I have written.

The only thing I write now are procedures, manuals and emails.

These are the only things in my mind now.

Do I still have the touch to write stories, as I used too, during my school days?

The time, when my mind was full of imagination… and stories will just flow easily.

The time, when I thought, I will be able to publish my own book, 1 day.

Hmmmm…. that was long ago.

Tik tik tik tik ! “Nope”….. Tringgggggggg “Delete”.

Tik tik tik tik tik tik ! “Nope”…...Tringgggggggggggg “Delete”.

I can’t even write the 1^st sentence. Oh! Gosh!

What should I do?

This is all because of COVID-19. Arggggg!

I wouldn’t even think about writing, if I don’t have to sit at home due to lockdown.

I have tried learning new recipes via You Tube and try my hands-on cooking.

What else to do during this lockdown? Some dish came out okay, whereas some…whewww! Came out with unpredictable result.

Nope! Cooking is not for me. I should stick with simple dish that I always do.

I’m not a great cook.

Next…Hmmm…. What should I do?

I have completed all the household chores that was pending quite some time due to my busy work schedule.

Next…What should I do?

Shall I be a YouTuber? What am I going to add in the you tube channel?

Nope! I have no idea at all.

This is really boring! This COVID-19 is making me to think and think.

Arrrrrrrrg! What should I do?

I know, I have to work from home, but apart from that, I still have some time to explore. Hmmmm…. What should I do?

(After thinking for few weeks)

Finally, I decided to write. But where am I supposed to start?

Huh! I know…. Google! My life saviour!

You showed me Reedsy.

I don’t have any 2^nd thoughts when I signed up. But after reading some of the stories. I wonder if I really wanted to write. This is when all kind of thoughts keep on coming inside my mind.

All the writers are so good! Do I really suit here?

Is writing really for me? Do I really want to do this?

Am I going to embarrass myself by submitting my story?

Arrrrrrrg! What should I do?

I have no idea! Hmmmm….

Something inside me keeps on saying that I should give it a try.

I’m not going to lose anything!

This is not the end of the world.

Let’s just try!

Let’s try by submitting my 1^st story.

But what am I going to write?

Tik tik tik tik ! “Nope”….. Tringgggggggg “Delete”.

Tik tik tik tik tik tik ! “Nope”…...Tringgggggggggggg “Delete”.

It’s not easy! I have left this long back. Should I really write?

I can’t even find the right word to start. Probably I should just forget this idea.

Let me take a short walk 1^st. (while thinking what should be written).

Not to forget, munching my favourite Pringles while walking.

And then, I Sat for a while and started to switch on the TV. Changing the channels from 1 channel to another. (while thinking at the same time)

But now, I have a chocolate bar on my hand.

Relaxing my mind… “Yummy”

I’m supposed to be on diet but here I am with a chocolate bar… ”Yummy”.

(After a short while……..)

Tik tik tik tik tik tik tik…..

Finally, my 1^st sentence written without any deletion.

Yes! I wrote my 1^st sentence.

Let it flow! Let it flow! Please god!

Let me submit at least 1 story. I’m not sure if I will submit more, but let me at least, take the 1^st step by submitting my 1^st story.

(After few hours)

Finally! I’m done.

(I took some time to read the whole story)

Hmmmmm… There is something missing but I’m not sure what.  

Hmmmmm…. Should I submit or not?

Argggggg…. I’m not sure!

I could feel something is missing but I’m not sure what.

I feel as if there is no life to my story. Hmmmmm….

Let’s give it a try! Let me just submit and see what happens.

(Few days, after receiving comment)

Wow! 1^st comment for my story.

I never thought anyone would even read my story but someone just did.

Thank you! Thank you!

It really means a lot.

I’m not sure if I’ll be continuing with my writing or not but I’m sure I could improve myself in this Reedsy community.

Thank you to all who has given me feedback to improve.

With so many hiccups on my 1^st story, I couldn’t even believe I am still here with my 3^rd story

What more could I say?

My heart felt, thank you! To my new family “Reedsy”.

Will I able to write after this lockdown is over. I have no idea!

I’m sure, the moment I’m back to office there are high chances I have to leave my dream behind again.

A part of me, really hope I don’t have to go through this situation.

A part of me, really wanted to continue writing.

I really hope, I will be able to continue.   

Hopefully, I would achieve my dream of publishing my own book 1 day with the help of my new family.

Stay tune.....