Submitted to: Contest #293

Tickets Please!

Written in response to: "Set your entire story in a car, train, or plane."

Crime Drama Mystery

Ticket Please

By Lee Kendrick 

Angus was perspiring as he heard the whistle for his 18:30 p.m. train to depart. He had just managed with his suitcase to jump on board the steam train…The Royal Highlander, a Sleeper train at platform 1 from London's Euston Station to Inverness, in the Scottish Highlands…A nonstop journey, that would take him over 14 hours to 8:45 a.m. the next morning.

 He had been travelling  on this journey for the past four years and always looked forward to travelling on the train because it was cosy. Angus was visiting his Sister, Fiona and his Parents in Inverness for the weekend. It was a welcome break from his job as a bank clerk in the City of London. 

The steam train was now leaving the station…Chug!chugging!away.

After putting his suitcase away on the overhead luggage rack, Angus hung up his coat and took out his newspaper from its pocket; he then sat down on the plush, tartan red-leather seat, and began reading his newspaper…The Evening Standard. The headline read: 

Still No Clues To Murder Of Woman Last Week On Inverness Bound Train!” 

Below the headline was a black and white photo of the middle-aged woman, wearing a black coat and black fur hat.

 Suddenly,there was  a rapid, loud double knock at Angus's compartment door.

“Ticket Please” shouted the ticket Inspector. 

Angus opened the door and gave the ticket inspector his ticket to punch it; the  tall, portly man promptly punched the ticket and handed it back to him.

“Thank you, sir!” the man smiled,

"Enjoy your journey to Inverness, sir!” 

A while after Angus put his newspaper down  and  gave a big stretch and yawn. Feeling hungry and tired he decided to go to the restaurant car to get a hot meal and some tea.

As he walked into the dining car, he got a wafting smell of onions and beef, making his mouth water. Sitting down at a table he observed he was the only one there…except for a middle-aged woman two tables in front of him in a dark coat, and wearing a black fur hat… Her face looked miserable, as though she'd been crying…

Angus sensed that he'd seen the lady somewhere before!

“Good evening, sir; here's the menu. Would sir like a drink?” Asked the young waiter.

“Just a pot of tea please,” Angus replied.

When the waiter had left, he checked the menu and decided to have a beef steak with onion and some potatoes. He then glanced up to look at the woman again but she had gone. He surmised she must've left as the waiter was talking to him.

Finally, after having his meal he rested a while then he opened his silver cigarette

case for a cigarette. Just as he applied a cigarette to his mouth, the waiter struck a match and lit it for him.

“Thank you!” Angus said. 

“That's okay sir, all part of the service!” He replied smiling.

Just then, Angus spotted the same sad lady again, but this time, she was sitting closer to him, one table in front; she was now sobbing uncontrollably. He decided to go over to her to see if he could console her.

“ Oh, sir, don't forget, if you are interested, we will be serving breakfast at 7:30 a.m.” Said the waiter.

“Thanks!” Angus said getting up  from the table to talk to the lady. 

Once again he'd missed her.

Where did she go?” He thought, looking frustrated as he glanced everywhere for her. He decided to call it a night and walked back to his compartment in the Sleeper car.  Moments later, the train chugged noisily through a tunnel, which caused the lights to flicker for a brief moment, and then the train jerked, 

him forward, forcing him  to grab onto a seat until the train smoothly moved on.

Eventually he arrived at his compartment and upon opening the door a waft smell of   violets hit his nose,; the odour only 

  lasted but a short while and dissipated. It was so strong that he thought a woman had visited his compartment…

Chance would be a fine thing!” He thought, scanning  his room finding no one.

After going to the bathroom…Angus prepared for bed; having wound his Timex watch, he then slipped into the bed. Putting his glasses on, he grabbed his ‘Saint’novel by Leslie Charteris, then put a pillow behind his back and sat up in bed reading until 11 pm. Finally, he left his book on the bed, and switched off the light, drifting off to sleep.

Meanwhile, the train chugged along as it puffed towards Inverness…With some 9 hours of the journey still remaining.

Now, in a deep sleep, Angus started to dream. The sad woman he'd seen in the diner car earlier appeared In the dream and pleaded with him:

“Please help me…don't let him get away with it!” She cried, holding her hands to her face, sobbing she then turned to Angus with her face contorted and asked…

“Did he ask you for your ticket?”

Moments later, Angus was awoken by the sound of a scuffle and people talking. At first, he thought it was in the next compartment, but looking across to the door, he saw two shadowy figures of a man and a woman arguing, moments later the man grappled with the woman and proceeded to strangle her; Angus became paralyzed with fear unable to move a muscle he could do nothing to help the poor woman, as he heard her choking;She clinged to the man's arms as she struggled for breathe finally …her body went limp and lifeless as she slipped to the floor. 

The tall, shadowy figure of the man promptly left, as if going out the door. 

Angus, now in a cold sweat, mustered his strength,and pulled himself out of bed to switch on the light to check on the woman… But there was no one lying on the floor! Puzzled he wondered…

Was it all just a bad dream?”

End

Posted Mar 14, 2025
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15 likes 4 comments

Argie Frizz
16:12 Mar 21, 2025

I love the choice of words (e.g. dissipated, portly, etc.). The few bits of dialogue were believable and natural. :)

Reply

Lee Kendrick
18:06 Mar 21, 2025

Thank you very much for your comment Argie!
Best wishes
Lee

Reply

Rebecca Detti
08:01 Mar 15, 2025

I really enjoyed your story Lee. What a dream! I really enjoyed the visual elements of this. Well done!

Reply

Lee Kendrick
10:33 Mar 15, 2025

Thank you, Rebecca for your comment.

Reply

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