The plan

I got a plan. I wish it was just as simple as that though. Breaking and entering isn’t a easy job to do, but with my 3 step plan I’m sure we can break into any secure building and get away with it.

First, we need to scope out the place we plan on entering.

Second, we dress like custodians on the night shift.

Third, we walk into the building.

Sounds easy enough right. This full proof plan has gotten me into millions of government buildings over the past few years. They never learn to make sure their “custodial staff” is actual custodial staff. When things go missing, so do you. They never expect the “custodians.”

I used this strategy to break into the white house last year. You would never expect what confidential files I found.

Reptilians? Maybe

Aliens? Obviously

Underground civilizations? Everywhere.

Flat Earth? Obviously not!

The white house went on lock down the very next day, but the never suspected that it was me the custodial staff. Nor will they ever find out.

Area 51? Been there done that. I can’t belie out federal government outsources the custodial serves of one of the most secure places in the world to a third party service. Thousands of people in the military and not of single one of them clean up the base. Just a third party service called Cleaners R Us. You must be wondering what I saw and took from Area 51. Thousands of bodies from thousands of different alien races. Turns out the U.S does the human races dirty work and protects the world from alien invasion threats on a daily basis. Now imagine what a lunatic from Roswell would pay to see the remains of a non-Earthly life form. Thousands just for the small piece of proof that they’ve been searching for their whole lives.

You don’t have to be like those Roswell lunatics, just be like me. I’ve broken and entered in to so many facilities yet I’m not even wanted in any countries. My strategy works in every state in the U.S, every country in the world, and the moon.

Oh!

Don’t tell me they didn’t tell you about the moon civilization.

Millions of people live there you just cant see them.

You see the World Union, a united front of every single nation in the world, has been sending resources and people up to the dark side of the moon to set up a doomsday civilization. It’s not like they need it though since the people on Venus seem to be doing just fine. Venus has twice the population of the earth and apparently does boil you to death. In fact the people of Venus originally came to Earth.

Do you remember?

Well you shouldn’t. They wiped our memories long ago when they started a war against Earth and destroyed a majority of our ancient monuments. You probably don’t remember the Ice Obelisk in the Arctic.

You might remember Atlantis but where was it?

Blasted into pieces centuries ago on the moon. Yes, Atlantis was the first moon civilization and the first attempt from Venus to colonize earth. Fortunately, we rebelled just like a certain country from Britain.

Where did I get this info?

The Sumerian Palace, a huge moonstone structure filled with history book from Venus and Earth. We truly are amazing planet parasites and the celestials agree.

I know I keep dropping information bombs on you but its incredible that Earth superiors gatekeeped the being that made us.

No it wasn’t that christian god Yahweh, it was a ancient giant that thrives on chaos and destruction. Venus likes to refer to him as Mallaway, in their language it means dark evil.

I like to think that us Earthians really live up to our parasitic instinct, slowly killing the Earth is so quirky. The people of Venus haven’t sent attacks at us in centuries because they know we are just gonna destroy ourselves.

Not me though, my plan all along was to live forever. The fountain of youth was probably the easiest thing I could’ve broke into. According to ancient moon textbooks the fountain of youth does in fact exist.

Surprise? Surprise! It’s in the clouds.

It’s been above us the whole time in the Stratosphere.

Of course I won’t tell you where, If I can get that information so can you. I left one copy of the book on the moon just for you. Yes, one its first come first serve unless they are kind enough to leave a copy too.

This three step plan has gotten me so much farther then I initially thought. Though there is one issue with the plan.

Don’t.

Get.

Caught.

Even though it is next to impossible to get caught using my plan, a safeguard is always appreciated. I found my first safe guard in Buckingham Palace. Those stingy royals had so many devices, my jaw dropped when I saw the dust. It moved in so many mysterious ways and was impossible to loose. They used it many times on the world to keep them clueless on what was actually happening in the palace. No the queen didn’t die in 2022, that was a hoax. The dust made you think she was alive for 80 more years then she really was. The dust had a habit of swaying the view literally and mentally of the world.

The queen death was officiated this year unfortunately; that’s my fault. When I obtained the dust the world finally realized that the queen was a husk. They didn’t miss the rest of their toys after I found the dust either; I got the death cube and Excalibur for the discounted price of 0 dollars and 0 cents.

I hope more people take advantage of my 3 step plan; we need more people on Earth to open their eyes to what is really happening in our own solar system.

It’s been entertaining watching Earthlings be clueless but it’s time for everyone to wake up.