Thursday

"It worked" you thought. You always were a sick one Elise. I couldn't help smiling back.

"So may I asked why you did it?"

"Oh you don't know why L? I mean honestly out of all the bodies yours turns out to be the perfect one. All it says on this paper is that I need an eye from the necklace you have on and have to arrive to these gates on the street it mentioned. "

"No, I DON'T know why. Also why the street of all places?"

"So They can see. Anyways follow me. I'll fill you in as you help me run some .. errands."

I followed her. This is either some sick kind of karmic justice or this is one of those dreams where my ex gets to torture me 1000 ways. Unfortunately I get the feeling that it's going to be both.

"Would it help if I apologized?"

"Seeing you float without a corpse is actually almost as good as a genuine apology .. almost. Anyways I doubt I'd believe you, considering the fact that you are STILL smirking."

"I mean this can't be real can it? There's no way you --", she waved her hand and silenced me at once. Ok so that's odd. Literally my mouth vanished. Now I can't scream, or worse .. ask her how petty is she. This is truly annoying. I feel like I woke up to one of those Tarantino movies where the story starts off in act 2 but you're left wondering why the fuck does this movie make more sense than the past 2 days?

Let me start from the beginning before this spell fully activates and all my memories cease. It started two days ago on Thor's Day, well I guess you call it Thursday, you heathen, when I was running from another psycho ex of mine (I promise I'm the good guy here) named lets just call her Angry Girl. Now she really hates my guts because --

"Hey what's the password for the gate. Oh yeah let me give you back your mouth."

Oh great. I guess we're going to do the Tarantino thing after all and explain most of this horrid experiment in dialogue form instead of exposition.

"The password,Love, is F.U.C.U.N.T."

"Cute, so you think you're funny huh? Well then I guess I will castrate your corpse so you wouldn't WANT to go back into it. Or better yet, I will cast your soul into a dog, considering how you love to hump every bitch in sight, even if its on my birthday!"

Okay Spirit Council members I swear on the corpse of my brother Thor it is not what it looks like! You see first.. wait uh let me apologize to her first

"Elise, baby here me out. You're taking this out of context again. You see, my ex was a shapeshifter too! Yeah the one, who taught me necromancy. The same necromancy that -"

"That you taught me? Well that's perfect. So besides the fact that you were inside both of us on the same day, we also share the ability to raise the dead and a desire to see you suffer!"

"Yeah well she hates me for something else. You see Angry Girl -"

"What's her real name?"

Sigh "Angrboda and could you please stop interrupting me! Like my thoughts are already loopy and I'm pretty sure the Spirit Council members are going to later look through my mind when I'm standing trial and .. wait why are you smiling?"

"You are so gonna suffer for this. I hope the council members can hear me too because fucking your ex on my birthday wasn't even HALF of what you did. I wonder if they can see your eyes too because hopefully they caught sight of that ominous looking sky. Apparently one of your kids well set half of the heavens on fire or something. Yeah I just learned that you have kids. ANOTHER thing you neglected to tell me. Also one of your kids happens to be a WORLD SERPENT! Just like his daddy he's bound to fuck up everything once he gets his ass, ahem I mean, his tail out of his mouth. Anyways give me the password to this gate so that I can at least prevent this Ragnarok thing from happening. If I can prevent that I'm sure you might get some of your sentence reduced and I can hopefully be done with this necromancy bullshit. Otherwise if you don't help me and I lose the people that I ACTUALLY care for on this planet, not only would the spirit council fuck you up to the fullest extent of their powers but I will personally fuck you up in the most sadist ways I can imagine because guess what I'm starting to like this necromancy shit and I'm getting even more creative!"

"Pfft"

"What's so funny Loki?"

"You can be creative enough to kill me and harness the power of necromancy and yet you somehow can't think of a way to get pass a simple gate? Even my stupid brother could think of a way pass this one. I mean honestly you could at least ask me, the floating ghost to .. I dunno .. ghost through the gate and retrieve the coordinates of the rune book you are looking for."

"Now why in the world would I do that? I mean first of all, I don't trust you and second of all.. who told you I was looking for the coordinates of a rune book.. can you .. read my ..?"

"HAHAHAHAHA! Now you know why they call me the Trickster God! First of all I'm not dead. I just made it look like that. If the Fates saw me looking alive and kicking my father Odin would send his favorite son, Thor to earth to stop my surprise. Second of all there is NO "spirit council". Third well I do admit I had sex with Angrboda but that's because it was on Thor's Day. Aaaaand finally, thank you Elise. I really mean it. Odin cast a spell that would summon Thor here if I wasn't interrupted three times, one for each of the Fates. As long as that happened before we arrived here it would be perfect."

"Wait so where is here and why am I forgetting why I wanted to be get to these gates?"

"Well let me answer your second question first. The reason you're forgetting why you wanted to be here so much is because of the eye you have around your neck. It is the eye of my father Odin. He gave it so he can gain wisdom,if a mortal takes it they slowly forget their mortal thoughts. Oh yeah now to answer your first question.. where is here? Here is where I promised I'd meet my daughter. Her birthday was on Thor's Day so I presented her with a gift, the eye of Odin to open the gates."

"I'm confused so .. where ARE we?"

"Silly me. We're outside of where my daughter Hel awaits. We're in front of The Gates of Hel! Get it?