Rae's Diary

8th September 1997

I cannot write much today, but dear Diary, she's here, she's finally here! My darling darling baby was born today. She's perfect, even better than I imagined her. And she smells so good, I can't stop smelling her! I'm still dozy after the anesthesia and my fingers are trembling right now, partly from happiness I guess. Okay, I've gotta go now,

Love,

Rae

26th December 1997

Yesterday was my baby's first Christmas. Poor kiddo, she still doesn't know what to make of those shiny lights and baubles , but I swear she enjoyed the Christmas Carols! She's been smiling at me all the time for sometime now.

David and I have a running competition between us about the number of smiles Diana gives us. Obviously, I won, with 87 smiles against his 79. He he.

Love,

Rae.

17th June 1998

Diana took her first steps today. Atleast I think that's what those cute two steps of unbalanced cuteness mean. David's been gloating about her first words too: Papa.

Love,

Rae

8th September 1998

Diana's first birthday. Already she orders her dad around like the little princess she is. He is putty in her hands. Me, not so much. I rather think she considers me The Monster Mom Who Forces Her To Eat Stinky Stuff. But when Dad is away, the girls will play. David is missing out on so many imaginary parties.

Love,

Rae.

12th October 1999

Diana is learning to talk so fast, I'm afraid that I shall be poor company for her soon. The darling announced yesterday that "Mama talks 10 words , Papa talks 5 words ( he, he) and me talks 100 words." I completely agree with her.

Love,

Rae.

4th June 2002

Diana's best friends have apparently told her that little brothers bite sisters. We had a huge showdown today where the little dear sobbed her heart out saying she doesn't want Aiden anymore. It was late at night when we finally convinced her that Aiden would not bite her (I hope so) and that he was the cutest and gentlest baby on earth. The day ended with Diana kissing Aiden on the cheek.

Love,

Rae

6th November 2006

Diana sang beautifully in her school performance today. Will she become a great singer? I asked Aiden, and he said, "If Di is going to sing, I'll be the drum boy." Of course.

Love,

Rae.

10th August 2008

Diana says she made a new friend in singing class today. Her name is Lila and apparently she is older. She smokes and doesn't seem to be trustworthy, according to David, who saw them together when he went to pick Di up. I need to talk to her about the not so nice influence of some older girls.

Love,

Rae.

3rd July 2009

Diana threw a tantrum today when I ticked her off once again for hanging around that motley group of Lila's. Lila herself was the not the problem here, I told her, but it's almost certain that the boy with green streaks in his hair dealt in drugs. Diana flounced off, calling me 'frumpy'. Well.

Love,

Rae.

4th July 2009

Diana was heartbroken today because Lila apparently 'stopped being her friend ' because my daughter asked her quite frankly about the drug dealing business. It turns out that I was right. Now, Lila doesn't want to hang out with Di any longer because 'she is too young'. Ha, she realized it only now, did she?

I tell Di, in a way, Lila was quite right for doing this. Di listens quietly, then turns her back and sleeps.

Poor Di. It will also pass, dear.

Love,

Rae

5th February 2011

Diana's been thriving in her new school. She says there are so many people in this school with whom she could discuss songs and history. I wondered how a daughter of mine ended up having an obsession with history. I find it very boring.

Love,

Rae.

28th December 2012

Yesterday our children put up a small performance for us for our wedding anniversary. I can't believe how much Di has progressed. She sings so beautifully- I had tears in my eyes throughout the performance. David whispers, "It's your voice, do you realise that, Rae? Your voice, but trained and embellished. It's your voice right there." I really hadn't noticed it before.

Now that I play the video over and over, yes, maybe there is a similarity. I feel like crying again.

Aiden looks at me in pity. "I know, mummy, I know. She's so awful, we feel like crying." Typical Aiden.

Love,

Rae.

4th June 2015

Di has finished school and planning to go to college to study English in the summer. My little girl is all grown up.

Love,

Rae

17th April 2017

Diana asks me how exactly to fend off a boy's attentions if one is not interested. I told her to tell him, "I'm not interested. Scuttle."

Di tells me I'm the most unimaginative mother in the universe. I suppose she is right.

I related this incident to David later and he took a quite a different take on it. "Tell me who this boy is, I'll go put him in his place" , he says, flexing his muscles. Very imaginative, this, I suppose.

"Don't roll your eyes, Rae, I'm serious", says my husband.

"Leave her be," I told him, starting to giggle. "She'll deal with it."

Boy troubles. I suppose Aiden will come to me asking how to woo a girl next.

Love,

Rae

13th March 2019

Diana's published article called 'Looking Back' has got so many excellent reviews, that a book deal has been offered to her! My little girl is beside herself with joy and we are all so happy. I slyly tell David, "Its all genetics. Just look at my diary entries. Such a good command over language."

David, who doesn't write for pleasure, just scowls at me. Ha!

Love,

Rae.

15th November 2021

It's Diana's wedding day today. We have come a long way since since that Monday evening when I held her tiny form in my arms. Today, after the bride and groom left for their honeymoon, I found myself listening to 'Slipping through my fingers' from ABBA over and over and crying over Meryl Streep and Amanda Seyfried in the Mamma Mia movie.

David is no better, he sits around looking morose.

Aiden, on the other hand claims he is finally glad to get rid of Di-Di. But we know the truth- he keeps calling her every other hour to 'check if the travel agency booked by him were responsive'. Poor boy.

Love,

Rae.

6th December 2022

Life has come to full circle today. It seems funny to call David and me as grandparents. Even more funnier is that Aiden is now an uncle.

Diana has two little cute twins, a lovely little boy and his cute little baby sister. Diana looks so contented. I look at her and something bittersweet swells within me. Life is all about growing up, and it's difficult for me as a mother to see my children grow.

How much more difficult will it be for those who are doing the growing up? We parents grumble a lot, but I doubt we realise the full extent of our children's problems.

Both Diana and Aiden have been through a lot, and there is so much more in store for them. But for me and David atleast, this is the beginning of something different- a winding road to the autumn of our lives.

David is going around giving sweets to anyone he sees. He is looking so excited.

Dearest David.

Love,

Rae.