2 comments

General

She was born prettier than anything. Serena's mother brushed her hair every day to soft silky hair. Serena's hair was much like her mother's only golden to the touch. She also had a kind and loving personality such as a dolphin, and much like her mother when she was younger. Serena also had her own beliefs, when she grows up, she would be the most perfect, kind, and caring Queen in all of the lands.

Serena loved to play in the Royal Garden, she would climb up on the hedges, swing upon the vines, and even play with other Royal children. Until.......

"Serena! What have your father and I told you about playing on the hedges, you can swing and play with the Royal children, but no hedges! It is an improper activity for young ladies such as yourself!"

"But Mother, I get bored in the palace, and the view on the hedges is incredible, and unlike anything, you can see from the palace windows and balconies! Plus, I feel confined in the palace, and yet you'll make me climb stairs but forbid me to climb hedges."

"Stairs are different, you'll understand the importance of young womanhood later, but now you'll prep for it, ok?" "Ok, Mother."

Serena's father Edward III conducts business in the throne room, and once in a while, every day, Serena comes in giggling and running, then jumps on his lap, and shouts "ORDER TO COURT!" But not this time. Edward patiently awaits her Grand Entrance, but no show.

Back to the Royal Garden...........

"Serena? Are you hiding again? Come on out for 'tis almost time for supper." "Serena? Serena stop this foolish nonsense, now go wash up!" "Serena!" The mother finally sees Serena's favorite doll and knows she wouldn't go anywhere without it. She calls for Duke, the Advisor, and he suggests Serena was kidnapped.

The situation was brought to King Edward III, and he mounted a search for the kidnapped princess. The search dogs led the people to the mysterious forest. Later, the dogs lost the scent, and Darrian the dog's owner led the rest of the way to a bear cave, there were shreds of the Princess's clothes in the dirt. Duke picks up the cloth and says, "Burgundy red silk, from the Princess's dress, we are near." 

There were muffled screams and shouts traveling through an echo. Darrian told the people the sound was just a mouse, and they should get going soon otherwise they were going to be the bear's second meal. It was clear after walking a mile from the cave, that Darrian led them in the wrong direction, deliberately.


Duke was good at telling lies from truth, so he was appointed to talk to Darrian. 

"Why did you kidnap the Princess?" Darrian began to speak but spoke in lies, "I dddidn't" He said as his words fell upon a stumble. 

"Lies!!" Duke shouted, and as the echo continued to travel, Darrian's facial expression changed. Duke couldn't tell what Darrian was feeling, his face full of stoicism. Darrian began to burst out uproariously laughing, "Did you think I wanted the Princess?" "Nooo, I wanted the treasures, she interrupted me, then threatened to scream. So I had to eliminate the threat, I left her to the bears." After saying such things, he began to laugh and call after Duke, "You can't save her now, she is most likely to have already been devoured!!!" The group headed back to the cave and prayed that the Princess was alive. 

Three Hours Later......

The group finally made it to the cave, then Duke started to give everyone a task to do. "You three," he pointed to one mother, father, and child, "stay here and watch Darrian and don't let him go, the King will await justice." Then he said, "Everyone else comes with me and we will split up into groups of five to cover more ground." 

Later on, "We found the Princess!!! Over here!!" Duke and the rest rushed over, murmurs and gasps of disgust, and anger filled the forest. "Oh, poor thing!" "What happened" "What kind of beast could do this to a child?" Serena sat there in degradation and sadness, she was no longer beautiful, her hair had mud, leaves, twigs, and knots. Her mouth covered with a gag clothe, hands and feet tied. Last of all her coronation dress was torn to shreds.

As Duke rushed over to her he said, "Serena are you ok?" She only nodded, her eyes were filled with tears, Duke removed the clothing from her mouth, hands, and feet, then helped her up. The gold and treasures Darrian had stolen from the treasury room was located and brought to the kingdom within a day's walk. 

At the Kingdom gates......

"Open up! The Princess is back!!" everyone cheered and shouted with glee, Darrian walked through, with hands tied, and pulled like a common slave, the villagers threw food at him and cursed upon his name. Justice was brought, the Princess cleaned up to look beautiful for Coronation Day, and Happy Ever After.


February 05, 2020 19:44

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

2 comments

Amelia Coulon
02:53 Feb 13, 2020

Honestly, it needs polishing. It jumps between past and present tense frequently. I don't understand what climbing on hedges and playing outdoors has to do with the child getting kidnapped. I think you might want to research hedges, they're not really very climbable. The reveal about the bad guy is given before he is even questioned. There is no chase to catch the bad guy, no real tension to save the princess and all is well in the end. It falls flat on the story format. I didn't care for it.

Reply

Alana Carpenter`
18:33 Feb 14, 2020

Sorry, I didn't mean hedges, I meant Bushes, and stone walls, I agree it does need some editing and reviewing.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Reedsy | Default — Editors with Marker | 2024-05

Bring your publishing dreams to life

The world's best editors, designers, and marketers are on Reedsy. Come meet them.