Sometimes love ends before it begins

“Ugg” Ezra groaned at his laptop. Why couldn’t he just think of an idea, have a lightbulb moment? He deserves that didn’t he, with all of this bullshit that the world was throwing at him he deserved an Idea. After thinking about the best way to go about this he decided to risk it. He wanted pizza and the best pizza in town didn’t deliver. After shutting his laptop and putting it into his backpack, he grabbed his wallet and coat. Then he stepped out into the world.

New York was something alright, it was so different from Texas but the people were still the same. He still hadn’t lived here long enough to gain a clear opinion. He liked it well enough but all the constant noise and people were tiring. How could someone have so much energy and happiness to give away. He looked into time square before today he had never had the urge to go into time square, to meany people and to little space, today there was a tug on his stomach he had to go into time square. 

He stepped into time square and was immediately engulfed into the lights. It was so blinding. He accidentally ran into another boy. This boy was extremely good looking with hair that was dyed rainbow and pulled back into a ponytail, the boy had on a bright pink t-shirt and was wearing light blue jeans. How could someone look that good? Then the boy turned around and Ezra’s mind died. He was even more handsome in the front view. He had a lip piercing.

“Hello sorry about that, my name is Alex” Ezra couldn’t speak. The boy, no, Alex even his voice was cute. Ezra had never felt this way about a boy before he could feel a connection with Alex already. Just as Ezra was about to speak he was interrupted this time it was not the cute voice of Alex, it was someone else. “Why don’t you fags go get a room and go back to the closet where you belong” that was when he realized that he was holding Alex’s hand. He was just about to let go when Alex took his other hand and asked “Can I kiss you to fuck with that guy.” All I could do was nod and then Alex’s lips crashed into his. He had never kissed anyone before even though in high school he was infamously known as a playboy. He felt the warmth of Alex’s lips on his and it was hard to keep them closed. Unlike all of the Solangelo fanfiction, he read to get him through high school, it wasn’t ceremoniously when his lips opened it just felt natural. He felt Alex draw him closer embracing him. 

Then it was over. As quickly as it started. He opened his eyes, oh did he forget to mention that his eyes closed. Alex was laughing. Ezra was wrong before, there was something cuter than Alex’s voice. It was his laugh. “Are you sure that that was ok?” Alex asked again. All Ezra could do was nod then he said stupidly he might add “That was my first kiss” Alex laughed again, Ezra smiled he would continue to make jokes and laugh if it kept Alex happy. “Then I owe you a date, I have nothing to do for the rest of the day so wanna go out for coffee, even though Ezra had a paper due at midnight he managed to stutter out a sure. 

-

Coffee with Alex was wonderful, Ezra learned that Alex was gay and his parents accepted him. When Alex had said this Ezra just laughed and said that he would like to know how that felt. Ezra learned that Alex was studying film production in college.

Ezra had told Alex that he was out too but his family didn’t accept him. He had told Alex that he was Indian and studying screenwriting so in his family’s eyes he was already a failure he had told Alex how he had wished to write stories that someone else brought to life so he could see what they thought of the words he had carefully constructed. Alex wanted to be a director so he could be a part of something that lasts forever.

Now  Ezra and Alex were walking around New York. Looking at everything but nothing at the same time. Thinking about how they had ended up like this. Together holding hands leaning against each other. Then Ezra remembered. He had a scene he had to finish. He pulled out his phone and looked at the time. He was surprised when he looked at the time and he realized that 9:11 PM. Time has a way of running past you.

“Hey Alex I have a screenplay that is due in 3 hours, I sorta have to go” Ezra looked up at Alex and he had a surprised expression on his face. Then Alex whispered “Oh shit” Ezra was confused. “I have to pick up my sister in 30 minutes” Then Alex took his hand and ran. He hailed 2 taxies and he was gone. On the ride back Ezra realized that he never got Alexes number. As Ezra was thinking oh shot, why am I an idiot, little did he knew Alex was thinking the same.

-

Back at Ezra’s apartment, he couldn’t write, maybe today was a dream, it didn’t really happen. Then he went on Instagram and decided to find Alex on there, Ezra did know quite a lot about Alex. Then Ezra found his account, maybe the universe was on his side for once. 

@Ezra 11:11

Hey I never got your number 

Then Ezra saw it. The most recent post. The one that said that Alex had been killed. How could universe have been so mean. He had found love and then it was ripped away. All Ezra could do was cry. Then he had it. The Ah-ha moment. The lightbulb flickering on. He went to his laptop and started to write. 

Love is such a hard concept to understand. One minute its there and the other it ripped away, but at least you can say that you met it, there are so many people we never get the chance to be in its presence so when you are you can’t help but wonder when it’s going to end, well for me Zac Miller it ended before it even truly began.