Dead Men Don't Love

Some people might have said love at first sight isn't real, but when Darrien saw this boy on his way home from work, he knew that those people were wrong. Because as soon as their eyes met, Darrien was struck. The boy was probably in his early twenties, much like Darrien himself; he was only twenty-two. He had long black hair that swept over his eyes in a very mysterious way. He wore a black hooded jacket, almost as if he didn't want to be noticed. Darrien thought that the mysteriousness was kind of hot. And his eyes, oh, his eyes. When Darrien made eye contact, the boy's eyes seemed to pierce Darrien's. They were ice-blue, and the longer Darrien looked into them, the colder he seemed to become. Maybe, Darrien thought, hot isn't quite the right word for him.

Of course, Darrien was probably fooling himself. Even if Darrien could manage to go up and talk to this mystery boy, he probably didn't even like guys. He probably had a girlfriend waiting for him at home. But still, it couldn't hurt to try… Right? And Mystery Boy was staring back at Darrien. Maybe he'd just offer to buy drinks at the bar across the street from the bus station. The bus wasn't due to arrive for another five minutes. It was now or never.

Darrien strolled as nonchalantly as he could over to where Mystery Boy sat in wait for the bus. He stood beside him awkwardly for a second, and then cleared his throat. He had no idea what he was going to say, but he needed to make something up fast.

Mystery Boy looked up at Darrien, his cool eyes running up and down his body. He said nothing, but his gaze alone made Darrien's heart seem to stop. Darrien was about to turn around right then and there, but he stopped himself. You can do this, he encouraged himself. Darrien had never been exceptionally good at talking to boys, but he could usually manage to hold a conversation. But something about Mystery Boy just made Darrien into a tongue-tied twelve-year-old again.

Darrien sucked in a deep breath and smoothed back his wild brown hair that he was suddenly self-conscious about. "Um," he started. He quickly searched for something to talk about. There! A Columbia University patch on Mystery Boy's jacket. "Do you go to Columbia too?"

Mystery Boy looked at Darrien for a moment, confused. "What?" His voice was deep and husky, with a trace of an accent that Darrien couldn't quite place. It definitely wasn't a New York accent.

Darrien shifted and pointed at Mystery Boy's patch. "Columbia University. I go there too."

Mystery Boy narrowed his eyes at Darrien. "I go there," he said tentatively. He seemed to be on edge, but Darrien couldn't quite place why.

"What's your major?" Darrien asked, trying as hard as he could to continue this conversation. The more Mystery Boy spoke, the more Darrien was enamored by him.

"Philosophy," Mystery Boy said coolly. His eyes analyzed Darrien in a way that made him feel like a science experiment that Mystery Boy was trying to decipher the results of.

"I major in Journalism," Darrien rambled. "You know, the bus isn't gonna be here for a while. Want to grab a drink from across the street?" he pointed to the bar, trying not to let his hands shake with nerves.

Mystery Boy stayed silent for a second, as if he was having a conversation inside his head. Finally, he said, "It'll be here in three minutes."

Darrien blinked. "Uh, well…"

Mystery Boy smirked, and a twinkle in his icy eyes told Darrien that he was just playing with him. Mystery Boy stood and raised an eyebrow at Darrien. "You coming?"

Darrien wasn't quite sure what to think, but he followed Mystery Boy to the bar. Maybe it was his way of flirting. Darrien was definitely into that. As he hurried to catch up to Mystery Boy, he kept up his rambling. "So, uh, I didn't catch your name," he said lamely when he was walking side by side with Mystery Boy.

"No, you didn't," Mystery Boy said, completely deadpan except for that twinkle in his eyes.

"Well, can I?" Darrien said, and instantly cringed at himself. It was about the least smooth thing he could have said.

Mystery Boy tugged open the door of the Bar and they slid into two stools. Mystery Boy sized Darrien up and apparently decided it was safe to say his name. "I'm Grimm."

"Oh, cool name!" Darrien said. "I'm Darrien. Is Grimm your real name?"

Mystery Boy - Grimm - tilted his head at Darrien. "Sort of," he waved over the barista. "Get me and Darrien here a beer," His tone was so demanding and authoritative that the barista didn't even ask for an ID, although Grimm looked to be on the younger side.

They sat there in silence for a moment, both sipping on their beers. Grimm's answer had confused Darrien, but he tried not to think too much into it. Maybe Grimm had a stupid given name, or maybe he was trans. Darrien wasn't one to judge. He tried to break the silence, saying, "So, are you from New York, or just here for school?"

Grimm gave Darrien that analyzing look again. Something about it made Darrien shiver. "I travel a lot," he said cryptically. It was as if each word he spoke was carefully planned out so he didn't give away too much about himself.

Darrien raised an eyebrow. "Very mysterious," he commented. The beer was loosening him up, and he was starting to feel more outgoing. Darrien was the type to get wasted off one or two drinks, but Grimm seemed unfazed and as cold as ever.

"I'm a very mysterious person," Grimm responded, his own eyebrow raised.

Darrien laughed, invoking a smile from Grimm. Good. Progress. Time to find out if Grimm was into guys or not. "So, do you have a girlfriend?" Darrien asked as nonchalantly as if he were asking what Grimm's favorite color was.

Grimm took a long swig from his beer and stared straight into Darrien's eyes. "I'm not really into that kind of thing," Grimm said, waving his bottle vaguely.

Darrien's heart leapt. "What kind of thing?" he pressed on.

Grimm smirked like he was enjoying toying with Darrien. "Love," he responded. "It always disappoints someone."

"But love is amazing!" Darrien said, and then leaned in. "Did someone break your heart?"

  Grimm glanced away. "You could say that."

"Why are you so mysterious?" Darrien asked. Normally he wouldn't have asked such a question, but he blamed the alcohol for his loose tongue. Besides, if Grimm wasn't interested in Darrien, why did he agree to get drinks?

Grimm glanced at Darrien in perhaps the most mysterious way possible. Darrien couldn't tell if he was doing it on purpose, but it made him blush harder. "Well, you see, I'm not used to handsome men approaching me on the street," Grimm replied, smoother than Darrien could have ever dreamed of being.

At this point, Darrien's face was beet-red. He tried to mask it by taking another sip of his beer. He ignored Grimm's obvious attempt at flirting because there was no way he could match Grimm in that department. Instead, he waggled his eyebrows and said, "So who's this heart-breaker?"

Grimm shook his head and the smirk melted off his face. "It's best to not remember sometimes."

Darrien sobered a little. He had just been playing, but he realized he might have hit a sore spot. "Sorry…" he began.

"It's okay," Grimm assured before Darrien could ramble out an apology. "You know, maybe I could give love another shot."

Wow. Okay, was not expecting that, Darrien thought. He thought he had just blown his chances with this boy with the icy eyes, but apparently not. It didn't make sense to half-drunk Darrien, but who was he to question it? "Uh, okay," Darrien said in the most un-smooth Darrien way possible. "I mean, yeah," Darrien cringed at his words.

Grimm just smiled patiently. "Go back to my place? We have a lot to talk about."

Darrien's eyes widened. "Yeah. Yeah, okay," he nodded emphatically. "Yeah," he added, just in case. Wow. Did a boy just invite him over? A handsome boy at that. Wow. But what did he mean they have a lot to talk about? Then, half-drunk Darrien discarded the thoughts. Who cared anyways? He couldn't mess this up.

Grimm stood and offered his hand to Darrien. Darrien smiled, took it, and they walked out of the bar, Darrien giddy and Grimm seemingly satisfied.

"So do you usually get boys drunk and then take them home?" Darrien asked, sitting on Grimm's couch the morning after they went to the bar. Grimm's place was small but homely, and was cleaner than what Darrien thought a college kid's apartment would be. It consisted of a living room and kitchen in one area, and then a door going into the bedroom. Darrien didn't see much of the bedroom exactly, but he had a pretty good idea of it.

Grimm laughed easily now. "It was one drink," he pointed out. "You got drunk on one beer."

Darrien rolled his eyes. "It's one of my many talents."

Grimm snorted and wandered over to the kitchen, filling a glass with water. He didn't drink it, but seemed to just need something to do.

"So, now what?" Darrien asked after a beat.

Grimm stopped. "What?"

Darrien gestured around them. "Now what? Is this a one time thing, or…?"

Grimm sighed, well, grimly. "Darrien, I don't want it to be… but it has to," he said.

"What?" It was Darrien's turn to be confused. "Why?"

Grimm put his glass of water on the kitchen counter and sat on the couch beside Darrien. "I… I love you. But…"

"But what? You know, I'm cool with it if this was just a little bit of drunk fun," Darrien said. To be honest, he wanted him and Grimm to be something more, but he wouldn't push it. It wasn't like he had much of a chance anyways.

Grimm seemed to sense Darrien's thought because he replied, "No, you're not. And I'm not."

"What's the problem then?" Darrien's tone was concerned now. Something was obviously troubling Grimm.

Grimm touched his hands to his temples. "Don't freak out," he began.

Of course, Darrien started to freak out. It was never good if a guy you just hooked up with told you to not freak out. "If it's-" he started to say, but Grimm cut him off.

"Whatever you were about to guess, you're wrong," he said gruffly. "Just listen for a second," Grimm took Darrien's hand and gazed into his eyes with a chilling stare. "Promise me you won't freak out."

Darrien gave Grimm a wide-eyed stare. "Oh, I'm freaking out. Just get on with whatever you're going to say."

Grimm bit his lower lip. "Darrien, you're supposed to be dead."

That was the last thing Darrien was expecting from Grimm. "Come again?"

"Friday, eight thirty-three. Struck by an oncoming bus. Killed on impact," Grimm recited gravely.

Darrien pulled his hands away from Grimm. "Is this some sort of prank?" he asked. Yesterday was Friday. When he met Grimm, it had been eight twenty-nine, and they had been waiting for a bus. Was Grimm going to… kill him?

"Wait," Grimm said, putting his hands out in a gesture of surrender. "Let me explain."

Darrien wasn't sure what to do. He knew he should just get out of there and call the cops, but a small part of him was curious as to what Grimm's explanation was. Darrien stood and backed towards the door. Curiosity already killed the cat, it wouldn't kill him too.

Grimm's eyes filled with what looked to be… regret? "Darrien, wait," he commanded, locking his icy eyes onto Darrien's. Darrien froze, paralyzed by his stare.

"How are you doing that?" Darrien's voice became panicked, scared. What was Grimm doing? Who was he? What was he?

"I do love you," Grimm started. "You're the first one I've loved in… in a century."

Darrien blinked and rubbed his head. "Excuse me?" He must have misheard Grimm, or he must still be asleep. Yes, that was it. Darrien would soon wake up and all of this could be over.

"I couldn't bear to take your life. But… I made a mistake. I can't love you," Grimm said. His eyes stayed locked onto Darrien, but Darrien noticed them filling with tears.

Darrien stared at Grimm like he was speaking another language. "Why are you telling me this? If you're going to kill me, just do it!" He knew he was tempting death, but what did it matter? If Grimm was going to kill him, he could have done it already. What did Grimm want with him anyways? He was hopelessly confused.

"That's just the thing," Grimm explained, despair clear in his voice. "I can't kill you. I love you."

"We've covered that," Darrien said flatly. "Why am I on your hit list again? Certainly doesn't feel like love."

Grimm sighed deeply. "I'm no good at explaining this. It's my job to take lives. Not kill exactly, but I control death. And it was your turn last night, but…" he gestured around.

Darrien couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You're the… Grimm Reaper?" he asked in disbelief. Darrien knew it was no time to make jokes, but his panic instincts were kicking in. Besides, there was no way this was real. Grimm would laugh and say Ha! Got you! You should've seen your face! and they could move on with their lives.

But that didn't happen. Grimm just looked at Darrien sadly. "Love is a liability in this job. I fell in love with you, and it was a mistake. I'm sorry."

Darrien let out a barking laugh. "You're not serious."

Grimm wiped his eyes and looked away from Darrien. Darrien found that he could move again, but for some reason, he didn't make a break for the door. Every instinct told him to run, but there was this other feeling. Contentment.

"I never did tell you about how my heart was broken before," Grimm said. Darrien leaned forward, suddenly overcome with the desire to know. "It's a sad story, really. It was during the War To End All Wars. World War I, I think you call it now. As you could imagine, I was very much needed in the war. But, I fell in love with an Allied soldier. He was perfect: brave, funny, kind. I wouldn't let him die, but like all things, my love had consequences. I was forced to kill him or I would die myself. It destroyed me, and I vowed never to love again. But here we are."

Darrien hesitated. If Grimm had to kill the soldier… then wouldn't he have to kill Darrien? "Wait…" he started to say.

"I couldn't kill the one I loved again. But…" Grimm's voice trailed off.

"But?" Darrien stared at Grimm. Then, his vision began to swim. "No!" he managed to shout before collapsing.

The last thing Darrien saw before slipping into darkness was Grimm's face, streaked with tears, standing over him. Grimm's soft touch and stare made from ice eased Darrien into a deep sleep. A sleep deeper than any other.