Silent Cry

The pain in my stomach becomes unbearable the longer I stood on the street corner. I watched as the people around me rushed to get to their destination.The smell of smoke was and gas was very strong. They all looked so careless as they pushed past me. A pain in my heart started with that thought. Why can’t they see I'm in pain, I can’t do this. Why did I agree to this? I tried to catch somebody's eyes, I wanted to tell someone that I wasn’t ok. Suddenly a pair of blue eyes looked into mine, all I could do was smile at them. For a moment the void in my heart didn't ache. Those blue eyes turned and left me to the lonely city. I wanted to see those lovely blues again even though my legs wouldn't let me. I was trapped in a box only allowed back to my empty house. I focused on the building in front of me. In big white letters it says “Cafe”. I pulled out my phone as a tear pushed its way out of my eye. The knot in my heart grew for no reason. I canceled the date with brown eyes. I wandered around the city looking for the blue eyes. Before long the streets become full with lonely hearts like mine. We were all searching for someone or anyone to fill the void. Someone called me but I ignored them. I only wanted that pair of blue eyes. Once I could no longer walk I called a cab to my empty house. Once I reached my empty house it hit me like a wave. I was never gonna find the blue eyes they were gone. They took my heart and ran with it. I dropped to the ground next to a window and reached out toward the city full of empty promises and broken hearts. I’m so lonely in this empty city. Everyone left me in this city. Everyday feels like I was drowning in shallow water unable to stand up with everyone watching but no one helping. I broke at the thought of never being able to get help even though everyone was watching me fall to pieces. I finally let the silent tears fall to their place on my floor. I hated that I was this way, I hate how many times that I've been the broken girl crying on her floor. My wet cheek pressed up against the cold glass as I reached up for the faint stars in the sky. I hate either being numb and not being able to feel anything or being in pain and stay up all night crying my heart out wishing for those blue eyes. I crawled over to my bed and rapped myself in the thick blankets of comfort. My shield from the outside world, from the hurt and pain. Who knew someone could hurt me so bad. Those blue eyes make me feel like I can learn to feel again. I cried myself to sleep that night, like every other night. When the light shined through my window I turned away hoping that soon the sun would leave me alone. I heard my phone ding with my friend's text. She was asking me if I was free for lunch. I agreed to meet her for lunch so that she wouldn’t get worried about me. I got ready for lunch then left for the busy streets. I walked with me head down, it's not that i'm worried about getting looked at. I was invisible, nobody would notice me. Expect for blue eyes he noticed me and my pain. It didn't take long for me to reach the small restaurant, they serve the best french toast. I walked straight to our table and my friend was already there. I put on the biggest smile I'd ever given as I sat down. We talked about nothing in specific as we ate. Whenever she asked me if I was ok I just smiled and nodded, unable to do anything else. Even if I did say something she wouldnt understand, no one would. I was stuck alone with no one to understand. Only if blue eyes didn't leave me I would have someone. I started to tear up so I excused myself for a minute. I couldn't do it anymore so I left to go back to my empty house. I couldn't help myself so I cried again and again until I couldn't talk anymore. I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I wanted it to stop. I wanted someone to hear my cry. Hear me and ask me if i'm truly ok .I wished to see those blue eyes again. I started up at the sky, the blue sky. I couldn't help but stare at it wishing for it to become his eyes. Honking broke me out of my thoughts. The city down below didn't care about me. No one would even care if I left. I was truly alone in this world. I watched as the busy streets filled with more and more people. The sky become dark and I started to grown tired and sad. I would always be lonely and wishing for something I would never get. My heart is soon going to grow to sad and weak. I just wanted someone to share my heart with. It will always be a wish and a hope. If only I could wish on a shooting star to get it. I watched the city light hoping to see a shooting star. I turned and watched myself in the reflection. That's when I saw the those blue eyes behind me. I turned and I saw him staring back at me. I shook my head. It's not real he's not here anymore. I rolled into a ball and started to cry. He wasn't here anymore he was gone. He left me alone to the city I would only see those blue eyes in my dreams. I was forever alone with my broken heart.