No Foolin'

The sun peeked through Faith’s bedroom curtains and woke her up from a not so deep sleep. She yawned, covered her eyes with her hands and rolled to the side of the bed and carefully searched for her slippers with her feet. She grabbed her robe from the end of the bed and carefully looked for any signs that her family was playing April Fool’s jokes on her as they always did in the past. She looked for any fake ink on the floor, artificial spiders in the doorways and windows, plastic snakes dangling from the closet, rubber rats in the hallway leading to the bathroom, shaving cream in the toothpaste tubes, or any other things that they could think of to prank her with. 

Faith didn’t like April Fool’s Day or pranks in general. She had a good sense of humor and loved to tell jokes and laugh but her family and friends take things  too far on this day of fooling around. She was going to avoid getting pranked today. She had plans. She was not going to work and she was not telling her family. Faith was going to stay away from all people who would put rubber vomit in her cereal today or anything else.

She managed to shower without seeing anything out of the ordinary. No shampoo in her body wash and body wash in her shampoo bottles. The water didn’t turn green or yellow when she turned on the shower and the toilet seat didn’t have glue on it when she sat down on the lid to dry her hair. Faith was beginning to think that somehow they all forgot about what day it was. But, of course, she hadn’t had breakfast yet so she didn’t know what waited for her in the kitchen.

Faith grabbed her purse and keys and headed to the kitchen where it was awfully quiet.  She wondered why her husband and kids weren’t down there arguing about who ate all the good cereal and why there is no chocolate milk left or who took her husband’s favorite coffee mug and drank grape juice out of it. She peeked around the kitchen door and slowly walked inside. To her surprise there was nobody in there. She carefully checked to see if there was a bucket of anything that would fall on her head when she got to the table or if the butter had been replaced with fake butter. She was shocked only to find a note on the kitchen counter which said that her husband, Bill, took the kids to breakfast and to school and to have a nice day. She looked to see if it was written in disappearing ink but no it was a regular ball point pen. Cautiously, she read the note again and tossed it in the trash. She checked the chairs around the kitchen table for any whoopie cushions before she sat down and there was nothing. 

Faith wasn’t going to take any chances though. There must be something that she overlooked in the house. She checked every cushion on the couch, every chair in the house and even under the couches. There was nothing there. Maybe there was something in her car or the garage. Faith grabbed her keys from the kitchen counter and headed to her car in the garage. They were not going to fool her. She knew that they had to put something in the car and she was going to find it. Not today's family. I am not falling for it. You won’t make a fool out of me. I won’t be tricked today. 

She looked all over the garage and found nothing. She checked under the car and nothing there either. Faith was really starting to wonder if her family had gone nuts and they all forgot to prank her or try to prank her today. This was unbelievable but nonetheless, Faith started the car and went to her planned spa day. She got pampered and even got a manicure and pedicure. She felt like a queen for the day when she left. Faith decided to get take out for dinner. They all loved Chinese food and she loved the place around the corner from the spa. She ordered all of her family’s favorites and even checked the bag twice to make sure she had everything in there. 

Her phone rang and startled her. She almost forgot that she had a phone since today had been so peaceful. 

“Hey, Babe, what are you up to?” Her husband Bill asked.

“Oh, just on my way home. I got take out for everyone. Are you at home or still at work?” Faith asked.

“I’m home. The kids are doing homework. I was just going to ask if you wanted me to order pizza but I see you’re one step ahead of me as usual.” Bill laughed. 

“See you in a few minutes.” Faith said as she hung up.

Faith wondered if her family had something planned when she got home. She wondered if she opened the door would a bucket of confetti fall on her head or there would be some slime in the doorway. She was prepared for anything. Whatever they had planned she was ready. She knew all of their tricks in the past and was ready for anything that they would come up with now. 

Cabe, her oldest son, was the prankster. He was only seven years old but he had thought of the best pranks for April Fool’s Day of the past. He was the one who came up with switching the body wash and shampoo and he was the one who came up with the rubber snakes in the closet that almost scared her to death last year. He reminded her of her dad who was the same way. He never missed an opportunity to play a trick on someone. 

Jake, was her middle child. He was more like her. He really didn’t care for pranks too much but his brother and dad would convince him that it would be fun to prank mom and he was the one who put the rubber vomit in her cereal one year. She couldn’t imagine what he would come with this year. He was only five years old but very smart.

Sam was the baby, he was only two so he hadn’t fully understood the April Fool’s day stuff yet but in time Faith knew that his father and brothers would tell him all about it and get him in the game. 

Faith pulled up in her driveway and got out of the car looking for anything that would scare her or anything that they thought would scare her. She didn’t notice anything unusual. Carefully she put the key in the lock and turned it and stepped back just in case the bucket of confetti was there and she really didn’t want a confetti bath today. She stood back and looked up. There was nothing there. Slowly she walked into the kitchen and set the bags down on the counter. She heard her family upstairs. The kids sounded like they were playing and Bill sounded like he was on the phone. She looked around and didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary. 

“Kids, Bill, I’m home.” Faith yelled from the living room.

A few minutes later her family was converging in the kitchen and opening the bags of food happily chatting about what was in the bags. Bill grabbed the carton of beef and made plates for the kids. Faith cautiously watched from the living room for a minute before she joined the chaos in the kitchen.

“Okay guys, I know you have a trick up your sleeves today and I need to know what it is.” Faith said, looking at her boys and her husband.

“What are you talking about?” Bill asked, stuffing his face with some fried rice.

“Come on you know what I am talking about.” Faith said, fixing her plate.

“No, Honey, really, we don’t know what you are talking about.”

“Come on today is the day that you all live for.” Faith said to Bill.

“Mommy, is it your birthday?” Sam asked.

“No, it’s not Mommy’s birthday.” Faith said, wiping Sam’s face.

“Ok, since you guys want to act like you don’t know what day it is I will tell you. It’s April first. April Fool’s Day. So, why didn't you guys prank me? You live for this day.” Faith said.

“Honey, it’s not April Fools Day.” Bill said laughing.

“Yes, it is. It’s April first.” Faith said, trying to find the calendar in the kitchen to look at.

“No, that was yesterday. Today is April second. We decided not to prank you yesterday. We couldn’t come up with an epic prank that you didn’t see before so we decided to skip this year.” Bill was laughing so hard that he had tears coming down his face.

“You mean I missed it? I spent all day trying not to get pranked and not only did I have the wrong day you guys decided not to prank me at all?”  Faith asked.

“Yeah, that about sums it up. I hope that you aren’t mad at us.”  Bill said, still laughing.

“No, not at all. Now pass the chicken .” Faith said.

Next year was going to be epic indeed. Faith thought as she smiled and ate her food.