I Will Not Leave

My mom left because she was tired of dealing with a crying baby, seems like the perfect solution to that problem. Well, it is not like you need both parents once you are born. 

***

Papa came home with blisters and bruises on his hands again. His boss wouldn’t give him breaks during his long night shifts. I had prepared a warm soup as this is his favorite type of dinner to eat. “Wow,  seems like you should open your own restaurant, Delilah” 

“And seems like you are the only person that I would trust with the finances and the keys of the place”

“Are you ready for your first day at High school?” 

“Yeah, don’t worry about it, dad, just make sure you get some rest, I don’t want you taking naps on the couch anymore”

“I’m sorry, honey, sometimes I seem to forget where I am and fall asleep” 

I gave Momo a bath since he had escaped in the morning, to god knows where.

“How come you’re more of a teenager than me, Momo?”

He purred and rested his fluffy, golden head on my thigh. When I woke up that morning both Momo and Papa were gone as usual. I prepared all my stuff and headed out to the door, the men never get tired of whistling where I live. I guess music can be an outlet for anyone. I didn’t feel like speaking, the other students seemed so caught up in their own worlds, that I bet a conversation would feel like a phone with a broken cord at the other end. The classes, on the other hand, had so much to offer. Teenagers really need to check their privileges and entitlement. The only issue was that I wasn’t the smartest fish in the sea, but even then I felt like a sponge sucking in on any information I could grasp. I had almost survived the day when all of sudden the teacher announced that the office wanted to see me. I couldn’t think of anything that they would want to talk about, when it all started making sense. I started running, “Damn , why is this school so big? Why didn’t I say goodnight to him?” I slammed open the door, trying to catch my breath, the room seemed foggy even though the weather man had said today was supposed to be one of the brightness days of the month. He lied. 

“How may I help you, young lady?”, said the nurse at the front desk from Charles’s Hospital. 

“I came to see my dad, his name is David Reynolds”

“Sure, go right on ahead to room 506”. Papa was breathing heavy, the doctor came in and told me that he had a cancerous tumor in his brain. I clenched my teeth and fist. He always did this, ever since I was little he always put himself last. 

“Sorry, that I didn’t tell you, Delilah”

“It’s okay, Papa”, streaks of salty tears began to fall from my eyes. I think he was too breathless to try and reach for my hand, so I held his. 

“I will always look out for you”

“And I will always look up at you, Papa”. I couldn’t sleep that night, the demons of abandonment had found me again. Remember how I said I didn’t need both of my parents once I was born, well it’s still true but I deeply yearn for their warmth. 

***

I became valedictorian of the class of 2014, although at the high school I attended, this wasn’t an easy goal to acquire. All of them were immensely competitive, and It’s not like I was going down without a fight. I had found a job as a veterinarian because I found a sort of connection with animals. The pay was good and the job itself was fun. All my coworkers were in the 30s, I guess I preferred hanging out with older people instead of kids my age. Ever since Papa had died, I decided that I wanted to become a doctor and help those with conditions. Being a veteran also helped me become a compassionate person as well as handle gross things. You would not believe how much a bulldog can poop if he is scared of a thunderstorm. 

I was put into an orphanage because I didn’t have any close family members that could take care of me. The head director didn’t really care what we did as long as we didn’t cause an embarrassment to the place. We also had to be home by 9, so I didn’t go to a lot of parties, yet I didn’t feel the need to go to them. I had friends here and there, but for some reason I never wanted to let someone in to my personal life, although everyone knew that I didn’t have parents, I mean, it wasn’t a false label after all.

***

Looking for a job as a dark skin female is kinda hard because you always feel out of place. Yet I landed a job at Point- Claire Hospital. My favorite patients were the children, they were so full of joy and would get so excited to receive their reward sticker at the end of the appointment. Emily was the best kid, she always made me smile with her punny jokes. Emily had 2 months to live. Emily never showed me that this bothered, but whenever I would monitor the halls during the night, I could hear a faint cry from her room. Whenever I could, I would bring her some tasty waffles from home. I would sit next to her and tell her stories about my Papa. I told her how Papa had a specific way of cutting my fruit and would always be frantic when I would be around something sharp. 

“Delilah! Don’t you realize hanging around dangerous things might get you hurt, even if you don’t physically touch it, let me handle the cutting”, Papa would say. God, he was so self-less. That morning Emily had cut her fruit into pieces and left them for me on her table. That same afternoon, I had to say goodbye to Emily, she told me that I was the best doctor and that she would never forget me, and she prayed that I would never forget her. How could I? She is now side by side with Papa protecting me from above. 

***

I have lost many people but I did not let that stop me, instead it inspired me to become a savior for others. 

***

I, Delilah Brooks am 50 years old and have  found the cure to cancer and this, was part of my story. Papa, I did not open that restaurant, but I made sure I put a smile on someone’s face.