Climb Every Mountain

A travel day customarily launches an out-of-town vacation week. When everything goes according to plan, our transportation connections line up perfectly and we easily leave behind all the workplace stresses. Having said that, reality may very well write for us a somewhat different story. These “vacation hiccups”, however uncomfortable, can provide for an adrenaline rush that multiplies the chances that future memories of this time away never fade. The basis of excellent storytelling is exactly this phenomenon.

Having retired in Mexico a dozen years ago, Henry found himself detached from his loved ones back in the States. Until today, the Covid chaos had postponed his annual trips back to California for an extended period. Now after a couple of commercial flights, Henry would be landing just after midnight in the capital city of the Golden State.

Henry’s plan was to meet his spouse at their rental property where he would drop off his vehicle to save on airport parking fees. Then off to the “Dock Cafe” for brunch before checking into La Paz International Airport for the early afternoon departure. July is hot and dry in the desert, so Henry dressed in cargo style shorts which had plenty of pockets to accommodate his passport, a pair of cell phones, notebook, pen, and other safari essentials. A briefcase, a checked bag, and one carry-on bag were tossed into “old faithful”, the thirty-year-old Jeep Cherokee Henry drove. Nothing could stop him now.

Halfway to his rendezvous location with his wife Mary Ellen, Henry was disturbed to find the coolant temperature gauge was climbing past the normal range! With only ten minutes to go, Henry (a fair mechanic in his own right) decided to press on. With each subsequent traffic light delay, the temperature continued to rise. Now just mere blocks away, the gauge reached its maximum sweep to the right. Sweating profusely and refusing to yield to the reality of an impending cooling system explosion, Henry pulled into the driveway of his destination. Without delay, he opened the hood to inspect the hoses for leaks. Henry found nothing amiss. Seconds later, the superheated liquid overpowered the pressure cap and spilled out onto the ground with tremendous force. A neighbor helped Henry drown the radiator fins with a garden hose until the eruption subsided. Repairs would be undertaken upon Henry’s return next week.

Well, with the first taxing ten miles behind him (and 1,200 miles yet to go), Henry and his better half jumped in her car for the farewell meal together. Two breakfast specials were promptly ordered and then nothing. The rookie kid waiter cleared nearby tables while the couple waited and waited for their coffee and/or juice. Trying their utmost not to sound rude, they both voiced their desire for some service! Eventually, things came together and the meal was served and consumed with ample time for the short jaunt to the airport.

Without the appropriate airline application on his smart phone, Henry was unable to perform a pre-flight check-in beforehand. The serious airline clerk appeared to be a little perturbed when apprised of this fact because now an extra charge of $150 Mexican pesos (about $10 US dollars) would need to be collected. Henry offered to pay the amount with a $200 Mexican note, but the clerk apparently did not have any petty cash on hand for change. A Visa debit card remedied this situation. A bright moment arose during the encounter when neither suitcase exceeded the weight ceiling.

Mary Ellen waited with Henry for about a half-hour before heading for home. Henry walked with her over to the self-pay airport parking kiosk which seemed to be on the blink. A technician standing nearby told them both machines were down. Before both panicked, he explained that a live attendant would be stationed at the exit to accept payment. Henry leaned in close to kiss Mary Ellen goodbye, but at the last moment she turned her head and his lips just bumped against her cheek. Not at all the cordial response that Henry expected after thirty-five years of matrimony. Or on second thought, maybe it should have been foreseen? Her recent cold shoulder and stories of being “followed” on the highway and “spied upon” by neighbors may be symptoms of the manifestation of a true mental disorder. Those delusions hopefully won’t prevent Mary Ellen from responsibly feeding Henry’s eight-year-old Doberman female while he’s gone.

Soon Henry was directed outside onto the tarmac where he boarded the airbus to Guadalajara. As predicted, the person seated directly in front of him reclined during most of the two-hour flight so that his right leg extended out into the aisle. Before disembarking, an announcement was made to remind passengers like Henry to confer with terminal airline personnel for further instructions and gate numbers regarding their connecting flights.

Landing was on-time, but well after the dinner bell (about 8:00 p.m.) When Henry disembarked, he found a Volaris airline employee standing at a nearby gate counter. He handed her his boarding pass for the following flight. She directed him to the left and asked him to walk all the way to the end of terminal one to his gate. For the first couple of minutes, Henry was comfortable rolling his carry-on beside him. Before long, he began to work up a sweat as he walked and walked and walked. Then down some stairs and more walking still. Finally he reached his gate, but began to have doubts because this second flight was an international endeavor and his passport had not been stamped yet.

Henry asked a nearby lady in uniform about immigration rules, but she was not an airline employee and could not answer his question. A second woman stationed at the Volaris desk told Henry he needed to authorize his departure at the airport immigration office located at the other end of the (961,000 square foot) terminal! Boarding time for his flight was fast approaching, so Henry sped off at a fast pace, re-tracing all of the steps he had just covered. Now he grew nervous just considering the impending time constraints and he felt faint from the warming interior atmosphere. His worry increased when he asked himself the following: “What if there were a long line of travelers ahead of him at the immigration office?” He could miss his flight! Now back at his starting point and asking the almighty for the strength not to black out, he still needed to exit the departure gate area and find the immigration desk at the main entrance to the terminals. He walked and walked some more, down some stairs, and then he arrived at the window of his destination office. Luckily, only one young lady stood in front of him.

The immigration officer jotted down some note for himself, opened the passport, then stamped and initialed a blank page. He ended the contact after explaining the no-fee policy for legal permanent resident immigrants like Henry. Henry thanked the man and hurried back to his faraway gate on his still empty stomach. Once returned, Henry found the third and last group of passengers had already begun to enter the sky bridge.

No time to eat, but Henry grabbed a bottle of juice at the nearest snack shop. For the second time today, the cashier could not make change for his minimal purchase. As Henry witnessed the line of boarding passengers shrink smaller and smaller, he fumbled for his debit card. By the time the purchase was approved, Henry had almost entirely consumed his drink. But before he could replace his card in his wallet, the clerk asked for the card back. She had mistakenly charged Henry six Mexican pesos rather than sixty Mexican pesos!

A further delay ensued because a manager was called over to authorize the reversal of the mistaken charges. This operation took some time, while Henry did his best not to panic, yell, or scream. Then the correct purchase price needed to be processed. With only a child in a stroller and a wheelchair-bound retiree left to board, Henry was cleared to walk outside and climb the rear stairs to board the aircraft.

Not mentioned previously, but when Henry found the rental car agencies at his destination airport closed at midnight, he cancelled his reservation. His late arrival time would make it impossible to pick up the vehicle. He got lucky and found a nearby business associate (Greg) who offered to pick him up and take him to his motel situated about 20 minutes from the Sacramento International Airport. Henry just needed to call Greg to confirm the plan.

As soon as Henry took his seat, he pulled a cell phone from his pocket to reassure his ride that he would arrive on time. At that same moment, an announcement was being made over and over again that cell phone use was prohibited during re-fueling and that all seat belts were to remain unfastened. Henry obeyed the order while waiting and waiting and waiting. At last, permission was granted again to connect with loved ones before departure via electronic means.

However, Henry did not find Greg’s number listed on his phone contacts! That’s right, things were so hectic today that other priorities had usurped that little task altogether. Not to worry yet, the number should be in the personal item on the floor in front of him. Henry found the number scribbled in his notebook; dialed the number, the phone rang, and then a dreaded message was broadcast. The recipients mail box was full! As a last resort, Henry could always pay seventy dollars or so for a taxi ride to the motel, but his monthly social security remittance would take a heavy hit.

Wait a minute, was that third scribbled number a four or a nine? Henry called a second time, substituting the other digit and Greg picked up the line! “Greg, I’m on my way and if you haven’t dozed off yet, please pick me up a little after midnight”; Greg agreed.

Many passengers dozed off during the more than four hour flight, but not Henry. He was in a constant battle with the person in front of him attempting to recline her seat. Henry stood his ground by maintaining pressure on the seat back with both knees to prevent such a move. His knees became a little worse for wear, but Henry deemed it a worthwhile trade-off.

Arriving on time, Henry breezed through U. S. customs and immigration inspections without a hitch. He even mentioned to one officer that he had previously been employed as a United States Border Patrol Agent in El Paso, Texas. In fact, the reason Henry now resided in Mexico was because he had retired there in his spouse’s hometown of La Paz.

Henry and Greg found one another outside the terminal and headed for the motel in Roseville. At the exit, Henry directed Greg to make a u-turn and go back under the freeway to the other side. Greg ignored his directions and continued straight, then turned left at a traffic signal. A block later Greg pulled into the “Best Western Plus” and parked at the entrance. Henry noticed the street number on the door did not correspond to the address of his motel reservation. After a brief consultation, Greg agreed to follow Henry’s previous directions to another Best Western (aka “Roseville Inn”) a mile away. At late hours of the night, confusion reigns.

Greg dropped off Henry with his baggage and the two agreed to meet up later that week. After all the excitement and road blocks experienced during the day (and on an empty stomach) Henry laid himself down to rest. The following morning, Henry walked to the local Hertz Agency where he rented a Toyota Camry for the week which, believe it or not, went according to plan!