Nothing After All

The train rattled and swayed as night slipped past outside. Halfway down the car sat one other passenger: a boy, maybe twelve years old. It was hard to tell, children seemed to grow up faster here, so she often found she was wrong.

The boy looked like a mark if she had ever seen one. He didn’t look rich, but he looked like someone cared, which probably meant he had some cash in his pocket. That was a dangerous way to look around here.

The train stopped, the boy remained seated, and three guys boarded. The guys were early twenties, clearly without day jobs if they were on the train at this time of night. Which made her think again about the boy. What was he doing on this train this late? Where were his protectors?

The three eyed him. The sheer mystery of his presence there may have held off one of them, maybe two. Maybe he was a ninja or was packing heat. Maybe he was a narc. 

But she imagined the three of them together probably felt good about jumping him and taking the chance. Though she’d love to be wrong. 

It was one of the longest stretches between stops. The three most likely knew that. She saw the glances they exchanged. And the boy began to look nervous, which wasn’t a good sign. That nervous look must mean he didn’t have a secret, and in this situation he really needed a secret. 

The three had taken seats diagonally from the boy. And they maintained their relaxed postures as one of them spoke up. 

“Hey kid, give us your money.”

The boy shifted, his posture steeling. “I’m sorry, I don’t have any money.”

The speaker smiled, but not kindly. “Sure you do. Boy like you? All scrubbed up ‘til you’re shiny? You definitely have money. The question is, do we have to cut you up to get it?”

And that was her breaking point. 

The boy tensed and shifted further back into his seat. She quietly walked over to stand in front of him. 

Of course they hadn’t seen her yet, that wouldn’t be fair. She looked like the biggest mark ever, she would be chosen every time. And that wouldn’t be fair at all. 

Now she appeared. And they startled, dumb looks of shock all around. For this task she liked to wear the clothes from her home world, for effect. Maybe it was a bit much, but it created some drama. She knew the look paired well with her long waves and made her look possibly angelic. She was fine with that.  

She mustered her tone of otherworldly authority. “He’s not for you.”

She touched the boy’s shoulder, and this time he disappeared with her. 

The three froze. 

The nice thing is, when you disappear right in front of someone they’re stunned for a second. Long enough for you to move. If they kept their wits about them, maybe it wouldn’t work so well. But it always had, so far. She pulled the boy away before they had a chance to digest what they saw, or decide what they wanted to do. 

But her speed and agility were unneeded. Completely spooked, the guys kept their seats, glancing nervously around, their tension clearly mounting as they waited the long remaining minutes of the ride. 

Finally one spoke.

“Dude, what the fuck was that?”

***

She held the boy at the end of the car. She whispered low in his ear that he must stay silent. He was confused, of course. She was touching him so he could see her, and clearly she didn’t look scary. But she could see the next conclusion as it reached his face. He was wondering if he should be scared of her. She hoped he wouldn’t draw the wrong conclusion, and put them both in danger. 

She maintained her hand on his shoulder, feeling his tension rise as she whispered as quietly as possible for him to hear. “I am trying to help you. Just stay quiet.”

He nodded, but his tension didn’t ease. She counted the seconds until the next stop and prayed he would stay silent. 

At the station, he bolted out the door, a beeline into the arms of a person waiting there. 

“Dad!”

Fortunately, Dad looked like he had lots of secrets. The boy was safe.

But just for good measure, she gave each of the three an unmistakable touch as she left the train, still invisible.

***

She trailed the boy and his dad. The boy spilled all the beans, describing the invisible lady who hid him. She was impressed that the boy understood that much. Sometimes people didn’t grasp that part. This world was very self involved.

The dad was clearly skeptical. But to her shock, the boy turned to him.

“She’s still behind us. I guess she just isn’t sure she trusts you.”

The dad laughed. And she suddenly felt for the boy. How awful to have your senses doubted by an adult. And only because you’re little.

“He’s right,” she piped up. “I’m right here.”

Dad whipped around. Of course he couldn’t see her. 

She laughed. “Don’t be so quick to dismiss what you can’t see.”

“Well what are you? Who are you?”

She pondered. She had never before been so tempted. But Dad still looked full of secrets. He may kill her. He may be able.

“You truly don’t see me?”

He shook his head.

She lunged towards him but he didn’t move. She threw a punch but he didn’t dodge.

“Damnit. What was that?” He shook his head, held his jaw. He truly did seem taken off guard.

“I’m sorry. I needed to check…”

“Check what? That my jaw is breakable?”

She laughed, though maybe she shouldn’t have. In a rare moment of instinct, she appeared.

And he froze for a fraction of a second, stricken. Then he stepped forward, a tear appearing at his eye.

“Clara?”

It was that word. Just one word is all it took. Her memories came flooding back to her.

She had just saved her son.

***

Her worlds collided as she remembered. Her banishment, his love, their son, being recaptured. Indignation swirled as she realized. They had wiped her memory. 

She shook her head, for long minutes her thoughts tumbled and reorganized, finally coalescing into a story that filled her with pain.

“They took me back, they made me forget... I would never have left.” Her whole world crumpled, and she could feel it reflected in her face. Her body sought to collapse as well. She only remained standing so she could look in his eyes.

He held her eyes but shook his head. Then paused and looked down. Finally he looked up at her again. But his eyes remained full of skepticism. 

His brow furrowed, and all she could think of was all she had missed. Her chest heaved and she felt lost. How else can you feel when you’ve just remembered the most important part of your life?

Her son looked confused. Clearly he had no idea. He must not even know her name.

The pain hit again, even harder. She remembered his tiny fingers, the way they had grasped hers. She thought of his teeny body, that she had held so carefully. And he didn’t even know her name. If he knew anything at all about her, it was probably just that she hadn’t been there.

She slumped in defeat. They had succeeded. They had ruined this, and the final blow must’ve been to send her back here so she would someday come face to face with their complete success.

The man she loved just stared at her, his face turning to stone.

She held his eyes, though she saw no hope reflected there. “You didn’t know I could be invisible. You didn’t know I came from somewhere else. You didn’t know I was sent here as a punishment, and taken back because I found happiness… you don’t know any of it because I wasn’t allowed to tell you. I protected you, even though it hurt not to share the truth. And then the truth devoured me.”

He shook his head. “They told me most of this after you left, except the invisibility. But I know enough to know we can’t have anything to do with you.”

“But—“

He turned away from her. “Come on, son. Let’s go home.”