The Big Race

Submitted into Contest #256 in response to: Write about a moment of defeat.... view prompt

38 comments

Kids Fiction

The crowd went wild as I took off from the starting line in The Big Race. Through the cheering I heard Mom shouting “Run, Sammy, Run!”  I knew without looking that she was smiling from ear to ear and clapping her hands for me. She was probably jumping up and down also.

I kept my eyes straight ahead running as fast as I could.  I quickly passed my best friend Tyrannosaurus Rex because, let’s face it, he wasn’t the fastest runner in the toy box. We trained together in the park, and I got a little bit faster every day, but he stayed about the same. That’s ok, I had reminded my loyal friend, he had many other good qualities being so big and ferocious. Speed just wasn’t his thing.

“Run, run, run,” I chanted to myself in my mind as I passed my friend Justin. I saw Justin’s red face out of the corner of my eye and wondered if my own face was that red too?

“Run, run, run.” I was on fire, passing Sarah, leaving her in my dust.

The coach was waiting for me at the finish line, holding the medal for the fastest runner in kindergarten.  I would wear that blue and white ribbon around my neck when we go out for ice cream to celebrate and then hang it in my room. Last night I took the collection of caps off the hook on my wall leaving it ready for my shiny new medal. I couldn’t wait to see it every day when I woke up.

Dad was there in the crowd also and would pick me up and put me on his shoulders to carry around. “My son,” he would tell the other fathers. “My son won the race.”  We would pose for pictures together to put under the refrigerator magnets and mail to Grandma and Grandpa.

Catching up to the galloping horse, I heard the clop, clop, clop of the hooves as I turned the corner of the lap.  I knew if I got tired I could jump on my friend’s strong back in one smooth move and we would go for the win together.   

“Just in case,” Mom had winked at me when handing me my backpack with Midnight tucked inside. It did make me less nervous about The Big Race knowing that my friend would be there too.

“Run, run, run." I was almost around the entire track heading back to the point where we had started. The blue and white flags were blowing in the wind celebrating our school spirit. 

When I told Mom there was a ghost in the school, she gave me one of those looks. “What makes you say that, Sammy?” She had asked while putting down my bowl of macaroni and cheese that night.

“Everyone talks about our school spirit. No one seems scared so I guess it’s a friendly ghost, you know, like Casper.” I had explained carefully through my chewing, not understanding why Mom laughed so hard. Maybe I had gotten it wrong, and Casper was the funny ghost, not the friendly ghost. 

It was the last stretch of the race and time to pull out all the stops, as Dad always said. I had paced myself saving some energy for the last bit and called my friend Sunshine to join me. Tattered and worn but still the fastest of them all, she appeared with all four paws in midair at the same time. Was she actually flying? 

I, too, flew like the wind, my feet hardly touching the blacktop. “Wait for me, Sunshine!” A funny name for a cheetah everyone said, but she was named after my calico. Sunshine was a fast cat too, especially after rolling around the floor in her catnip. She really got the zoom zoomies then!

I was going to win! Faster than Justin, faster than Sarah, I came up behind Mikey and put the extra oomph into my legs to pass him by. The winner, Sammy! Fastest in all of kindergarten. All that running in the park was worth it, even when I was grumpy and sore and wanted to lay on the couch watching cartoons. 

“There’ll be plenty of time for TV after The Big Race, champ,” Dad reminded me every time we put on our matching t-shirts to run another lap at the park.

“It’s almost ice cream time,” I called out to the love-worn cheetah racing effortlessly to the finish line. Although cats don’t eat ice cream, I still put a little in her bowl when no one was looking.

Just as I heard the roar of the crowd welcoming me to the finish line, I saw a blur out of the corner of my eye. What? Mom said not to look around and to keep my eye on the prize, but I had to see. There was Justin with his tomato cheeks running as fast as humanly possible, huffing and puffing like he was going to blow the house down. And then he was in front of me. I was behind tomato face Justin. 

“Help, guys! I need you now!” I called on Sunshine’s incredible speed, Midnight’s galloping strength, and even Rex, who was slow and steady, to win the race. My legs pumped up and down faster and faster getting closer and closer to the coach holding my shiny gold medal. I crossed the finish line. 

The voice over the loudspeaker boomed, “Congratulations to the winner, Justin!”

Congratulations to Justin?

Congratulations to Justin.

I watched the confetti fall as he held up his arms for the crowd, showing that he was the winner. The star. The fastest runner in all of kindergarten. The coach placed the blue and white ribbon round Justin’s neck. The shiny medal was his.

I did not win. 

I was not the fastest runner. 

I lost.

I looked down at the blacktop and heard buzzing in my ears. My heart pounded so hard I thought it was exploding. My legs felt like the jelly that goes with my peanut butter, all soft and gooey.

I lost The Big Race.

Mom and Dad came bursting through the crowd. I looked down at their feet. Mom’s toenails were painted blue and white for school spirit.  Dad wore his brown loafers for when he worked out in the field. I couldn’t look up. I didn’t want to see their sad faces. Were they crying in disappointment? I fought back my own tears.

Suddenly scooped up and riding on Dad’s shoulders, I was shocked. What was happening? Mom was smiling ear to ear and clapping her hands. Dad passed around his camera asking for photos to send to Grandma and Grandpa.

“But…” I stammered. Maybe they didn’t see it clearly? Did they forget to put their glasses on? 

“But what, Sammy?” 

“I lost the race.” I blurted out in a shaky voice, my tummy doing somersaults.

“Sammy, you did great. We’re so proud of you!” 

***

Later that night after I ate all my ice cream with sprinkles, I got cozy in my bed. I looked at the empty hook on my wall where my award was supposed to hang. The tears I had held in at the finish line poured out onto my pillow. 

“It’s not fair!”  I was mad, super mad.

The memory of Justin’s face as he passed me by came back to me. His face was red like a tomato, his breathing was heavy like the wolf in The Three Little Pigs. He did win fair and square, I had to admit. 

I looked at Rex, Midnight and Sunshine all tucked in next to me. “We’ll get ‘em next time, won’t we, guys?”

June 23, 2024 17:50

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38 comments

Kate Winchester
03:25 Jul 18, 2024

This is really cute! Loved it! This line was my favorite: “I quickly passed my best friend Tyrannosaurus Rex because, let’s face it, he wasn’t the fastest runner in the toy box.” It made me chuckle.

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Hannah Lynn
16:18 Jul 18, 2024

Aww thanks, Kate! Your comment made me chuckle :)

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Kate Winchester
17:58 Jul 18, 2024

Welcome 😂🥰

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Matt Pearson
18:20 Jul 09, 2024

A great read!

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Hannah Lynn
20:45 Jul 09, 2024

Thanks so much, Matt! :)

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HH The Author
23:39 Jul 04, 2024

Warming, Hannah. Wonderful pacing and detail.

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Hannah Lynn
01:16 Jul 05, 2024

Thanks so much for the kind words :)

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Beverly Goldberg
01:13 Jul 04, 2024

So charming, acceptance and growth.

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Hannah Lynn
13:14 Jul 04, 2024

Thanks, Beverly! I appreciate the feedback :)

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Keba Ghardt
18:56 Jul 03, 2024

This is such a well-crafted story. You've skillfully dropped in details without having to broadcast anything about the characters or the stakes. It reads much more like a conversation with a friend than a narrative for an audience; no exposition needed. When the turn comes, it takes nothing for the reader to know how that feels.

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Hannah Lynn
13:13 Jul 04, 2024

Keba, thank you so much for the praise! I'm so glad you enjoyed the story of Sammy's race :)

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20:28 Jul 02, 2024

So competitive at such a young age. So much suspense as I was reading. Sad, he lost but it's all a learning curve on the track. "Justin ... did win fair and square." He's a good sport too. Thanks for reading my story.

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Hannah Lynn
22:13 Jul 02, 2024

Thanks for reading, Kaitlyn! Yes, Sammy is a good sport that’s for sure. Some adults can take a lesson from him. 😊 I appreciate the feedback!

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Hannah Foust
02:27 Jul 01, 2024

Great read from Sammy's prospective, At least he was a good sport!

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Hannah Lynn
12:29 Jul 01, 2024

Yes, he was a good sport! (Some adults can take a lesson from him lol….) Thanks for reading, Hannah!

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Carol Stewart
19:16 Jun 30, 2024

A cute, fun read. Bet it was as much fun to write. The child's perspective is one I've always enjoyed. I particularly liked the misunderstanding over the school spirit!

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Hannah Lynn
20:26 Jun 30, 2024

LOL, kids say the darndest things! Thanks for reading, Carol! :)

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Kay Smith
16:34 Jun 30, 2024

This was really a well-written child's perspective! Kudos!

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Hannah Lynn
17:11 Jun 30, 2024

Thank you so much! I really appreciate that! 😊

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Stevie Burges
07:59 Jun 30, 2024

That was great, Hannah. It really seemed to capture the thoughts of a kindergarten child. I really enjoyed it.

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Hannah Lynn
12:22 Jun 30, 2024

Thanks, Stevie! It was fun to put myself in that character’s mindset. I’m glad it rang true :)

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Darvico Ulmeli
21:00 Jun 29, 2024

Next time. I was cheering for him. :)

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Hannah Lynn
02:33 Jun 30, 2024

Yes, next time! We have to keep trying :) Thanks for reading!

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Jahson Clarke
20:09 Jun 29, 2024

This was a calming read. Very good piece.

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Hannah Lynn
02:32 Jun 30, 2024

Thank you so much, Jahson! I’m glad you enjoyed it!

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Anat Kalinski
01:57 Jun 27, 2024

Lovely story, filled with excitement and anticipation. Carefully constructed to reflect a child's way of thinking. I thoroughly enjoyed.

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Hannah Lynn
14:23 Jun 27, 2024

Thank you so much, Anat. This was a step away from my usual perspective, and seeing the world through a child's eye was a fun story to create :) I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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08:58 Jun 25, 2024

What a delightful story, Hannah! I thoroughly enjoyed it. Well done!

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Hannah Lynn
11:18 Jun 25, 2024

Thanks Melissa! 😊 This was a fun one to write putting myself into the heart and mind of little Sammy!

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Alexis Araneta
07:39 Jun 24, 2024

Adorable one, Hannah ! And horray for Sammy's parents for making him feel like the winner he is.

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Hannah Lynn
16:09 Jun 24, 2024

Thanks so much, Alexis! Yes Sammy’s parents are heros!

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Trudy Jas
02:01 Jun 24, 2024

A sweet story. I like the toys that are helping Sammy stay on track. Too bad there were no ribbons for effort. But that's what moms and dads are for - and ice cream with sprinkles. :-)

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Hannah Lynn
15:59 Jun 24, 2024

Ice cream and sprinkles is always a nice treat! (Getting hungry….) Thanks for reading, Trudy! I’m glad you enjoyed it.

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Mary Bendickson
00:35 Jun 24, 2024

Way to go for the gold? 🥇

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Hannah Lynn
00:49 Jun 24, 2024

Aww there’s that #1 medal that little Sammy wanted! Thanks for reading!

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Mary Bendickson
01:04 Jun 24, 2024

Thought it deserved medal 😁.

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Kristi Gott
19:41 Jun 23, 2024

So charming and well written. Creative and insightful details, with the main character getting inspiration from the animals. Caring parents setting a good example of being supportive. You do not need to win the competition or achieve in order to be loved and valued. A fun story, with a wise lesson, and a happy ending. Well done!

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Hannah Lynn
21:51 Jun 23, 2024

Kristi, thanks so much for your thoughtful praise! I’m glad you enjoyed the story! 😊

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