This was goodbye

Looking up, all he can see is the darkness. The warehouse is completely deserted. Unrecognizable. Where there usually were shelves of metal high as the sky, there is now nothing. Nothing as far as the eye can see. Only the vast space the light has abandoned. 

The winter breeze blows Calvin’s mind into the past. The days before she left, before the warehouse was made into its current state. He always tried to keep her happy, but somehow still failed. He misses her, he’ll never admit it, but he constantly thinks of her. She may have left Newbury, but she never left his thoughts.

They used to stare through this very window, imagining everything they would do with a warehouse. Some days they would change it into a chocolate factory, and others a paint manufacturer. It never mattered what it would be, as long as it is theirs, as long as they have something for them. A materialistic thing that would only belong to them. It would be their factory. 

Although they spent most of their time at this window, they never got around to buy what was on the other side of it, to make it theirs. It was always just a dream, a concept. Back then the warehouse was still the Fanta factory, so naturally they refused to let their lips touch any Fanta cooldrink. Fanta stopped them from owning it, or at least, that is what they thought.

After a while, Fanta relocated, leaving the warehouse up for sale, but Calvin was not ready to take the risk. Money had been tight that month and he couldn't see anything stopping them from waiting a little longer. So they waited, too long. As time passed the need for a warehouse became less urgent. Calvin and Stella started losing interest, not only in their idea for a factory, but in each other too. 

That is when she left. When their dreams started dying. Their love was built on a common area found in their imagination. When they lost their dreams and started to become just another part of the system in their workplaces, they lost each other. They got swallowed up by the priorities of mankind. 

As Calvin looks down at his watch, he realizes that, once again, he is late for work. Night shifts were always the hardest. Stella was at work in the day, and the only time they had together he would be working, twice a week this happened. He would sit there yawning in front of the computer screen, his mind wandering to Stella. He loved her more than anyone knew.

The problem was that Calvin wasn't a very affectionate person, most people would think of him as cold-hearted. But Stella understood him, she knew that he cared so very deeply. He also understood her. It was the perfect match. She was talkative and he was more introverted. Wherever he lacked, she provided, and where she needed help, he had plenty. 

As he walks down the pathway next to the dark warehouse his eyes capture the sign stating that the warehouse is for sale. His heart aches. Why didn't he just buy it? Then, maybe, Stella would still be here. They could have been business partners, but also, possibly, married. He forces the thought to leave his mind. He really can’t afford to think of her now. No matter how much he wants to.

The day Stella left Calvin, he cried. The most masculine, toughest guy you’ll ever meet, cried. He is ashamed of that, but he just couldn’t help it. He needed her, but she wasn’t there. He wanted to hold her, but she was already warm. She was gone, and he was alone. 

After completing his night shift, Calvin takes a cab home. The driver puts a piano ballad on the radio. Calvin can’t help but to think of Stella, yet again. She always listened to piano songs although she hated it, because she read somewhere that it helps with intellectual development. He always just smiled when he heard the ivory keys in another room.

Calvin is stuck in this endless cycle of thoughts. Everywhere he goes he thinks of her. When he wakes up, walks to work, eats dinner, goes to sleep, everywhere. He just can’t seem to let her go. He can’t lose the last bit of hope he has, that being Stella. That is why he stares through the shattered windows of the warehouse he never bought. He misses Stella and the warehouse is his last souvenir of her. 

Stella went to Phoenix to live with her aunt. She met a new guy and they are engaged, only because she is pregnant, of course. She will never find a love like Calvin’s. Calvin will never fall in love like for Stella, always being scared to get hurt like he did when she went to Phoenix. Like the warehouse, Stella left him with shattered windows, and in complete darkness. 

Calvin tries to control the dark ocean of thoughts drowning him. He takes two $1 notes out of his pocket, and not wanting to wait, tells the driver to keep the change. He goes into his lonely house and turns the television on. He does not really watch anything on T.V these days, that was his and Stella’s favorite hobby (besides dreaming through the warehouse window) and he does not want to think of her with each film or series he watches. He uses his television for background noise only to kill the complete silence. 

Suddenly there’s a loud knock on the door, and probably coincidentally exactly how Stella used to knock- one loud knock followed by three rapid ones. He opens the door, and there stood the girl of his dreams, the one person he always loved, his almost business partner. Stella stood there, a slight bump on her stomach and clear signs of crying, but beautiful as always. 

She and her fiance had been fighting and she decided to leave him, too. She cried while telling her sad tale of love. Calvin was confused, still happy to see her, but knowing that he is still hurting from the last time they had seen each other. He was torn between letting her stay and buying her a ticket to Phoenix, sending her back to Jason. 

After a long discussion, Calvin realized that if he let her stay, he would be tearing a possible marriage, family, and household apart. 

He let her stay the night but told her that she would be going back the following day. It was for the better. Calvin knew that he had to stay strong, as a last act of kindness to Stella. Years from now she will be thanking him for this, for letting her move on. This was goodbye.

Goodbye to the warehouse ideas, and the late-night movies. Goodbye to piano music in every second room. Goodbye to the tears and the hugs, the laughs, and the fights. Goodbye to Stella. And he would be okay...