Broken Glass Slippers

Broken Glass Slippers

by Edye Dama

Saturday, October 10, 2019

Nobody I knew ever died before. It wasn't like in the movies. You know - mourners with with white hankies huddled under black umbrellas. White-collared minister reading about returning to dust. And the bereaved tossing a single, perfect, red rose onto the handfuls of black dirt strewn atop the coffin.

Our pastor was wearing a tee shirt and singing. And sweating. Never mind that it's almost Halloween. The flowers are already way wilted. Here in Georgia, I don’t think we throw clods of red clay on our coffins. I probably was the only one crying and I didn't even have any Kleenex....

Sunday, August 9, 2019

Daddy isn't home yet. Big surprise. It's his weekend but they had to reshoot a scene for this week's episode of "Gods and Zombies." I don't mind. I used his credit card to order pizza. At least I don't have to listen to Cat telling me how fat it's going to make me.

Sunday, again

Daddy walked in just as I was stuffing slice number three and said, "Got any beer?" I'm going to ask him when he gets out of the shower.

Monday, August 10, 2019

He said I had to ask Jack and Cat. They said YES! They're gonna bring me more clothes today. I get to stay until school starts! Jamie's upset but they all said she can come next weekend. After today, I have to go to the set with Daddy to "help out." Yes! Two whole weeks without the Cat Monster!

Tuesday, August 11, 2019

Cat brought the WORST clothes - no tank tops, no shorts. Ugh! Whatever. Daddy will let me buy new stuff. Jack was all sweet and hugged me and said I could come back whenever, just call him.

It was pretty cool on the set today. I got to be an extra. I've done that before. I even have a SAG card. It says "Bird McKinley." Thank God they didn't make me put Roberta, or even Addison. Cat says Southern girls with family names for middle names have a better chance of getting into Agnes Scott. But Jamie doesn't have a stupid middle name because Jack thinks that's stupid. Because it is. Jamie's the one who gave me my real name because she couldn't say Roberta. That was six years ago. I got to leave Roberta behind in elementary school. Cat still calls me Roberta of course because she's such a HYPOCRITE! Her name is Cathy but I can't even call her MOM any more. "I feel like a Cat," she says. Mid-life crisis, much? God. Whatever.

Wednesday, August 12, 2019

Daddy actually made me work today. I had to help this kid Drew who's doing a summer internship in filmmaking. He was doing camera stuff and I had to stand in for some of the actors so he could get the light or the angles or something right. I've seen him on the school bus but I never knew him before. All my "finger quotes" friends called him "the retard." Actually, he has Asperger's. He told me all about it. He's really crazy smart. Shows what they know. Anyway, it was cool to talk to someone my age. Not one of them has called me ALL FREAKING SUMMER!

Thursday, August 13, 2019

Worked all day. Too tired to write.

Friday, August 14, 2019

I got the day off today. I told Daddy I needed some clothes. I have my license but Jack and Cat don't think I need my own car until I go to college. What they don't know is Daddy lets me drive all the time. He has all these cars on the set and like major insurance so he doesn't care. Today I drove a freaking FERRARI! I asked if Drew could go with me so he got the day off too. We hit the mall as soon as it opened. Drew was actually the coolest because he basically doesn't know how to use flattery. I tried on clothes and got a totally honest opinion for once. He mostly insulted me without meaning to which was freaking hilarious. The cutest part was when I put on this one lavender dress and he actually BLUSHED when he said it was pretty.

Saturday, August 15, 2019

Never mind. I can't.

Sunday, August 16, 2019

God. Yesterday Cat made me come home because she said we HAD to buy my Homecoming dress NOW! Never mind that it took half of the weekend I was supposed to spend with Jamie at Daddy's. Sweet eight year old that she is, she didn't mind because she got to go with us. She said I looked like a princess in literally every dress. I love that kid! Cat, of course, was more critical. She finally bought this hideous purple thing with a built in padded push-up bra. It's totally embarrassing. The only thing I like is the color.

Monday, August 17, 2019

I got to be a zombie that got killed, like for real.

Tuesday, August 18, 2019

Drew came over tonight. We’re all fixing to watch an old horror movie Daddy had a bit part in back when he was young Bobby McKinley, aspiring actor, way before he became Bob Mack, director of “Gods and Zombies.”

Wednesday, August 19, 2019

We had a real wolf on the set today! He was so pretty, but I wasn’t allowed to pet him.

Thursday, August 20, 2019

Drew and I helped the sound engineer today. You’d be surprised how boring “Gods and Zombies” is without music and effects. Had to go to school with Cat to register and get book lists. So not ready to go back yet.

Friday, August 21, 2019

It was my last day on the set of “Gods and Zombies.” The cast and crew had a going away party for me and Drew because school starts Monday. I have to go home tomorrow.

Saturday, August 22, 2019

Cat ironed all my “school clothes.” I’m NOT wearing any of them.

Sunday, August 23, 2019

Jack had an end of the summer cookout. It was nice. Cat didn’t even say anything about how much I ate because she pigged too!

Monday, August 24, 2019

None of my friends were on the bus. They all got cars over the summer. Well, all except Drew. We sat on the bus together and when we got off, still talking, there they were in the parking lot. They saw me too and snickered. I heard a few “OMGs” and “retards.” Losers. I ignored them.

Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday

Too much homework. Ugh!

Friday, August 28, 2019

I really have to tell Trace. God, what a stupid name. Like his mom must have been addicted to soap operas or something. He should have a girlfriend named “Skye” or some shit like that, not “Roberta.” I guarantee you there has never been one single soap character EVER named Roberta. Unless she was somebody’s grandmother or something.

Anyway. I am NOT going to Homecoming.

Cat can’t make me.

Saturday, August 29, 2019

Had to write a paper.

Sunday, August 30, 2019

Ugh! Cat is MAKING me go to Homecoming. Because we already bought the dress. The DRESS! Who freaking cares? At least I’m not going with Two-Face Trace. I told him. He’s pissed. I don’t care. In fact, I’m RELIEVED! Guess it wasn’t true love after all.

Glad we never had sex.

I think.

Monday, September 7, 2019 Labor Day

Speaking of not having sex (and, yes, I know I haven’t written anything for a week, so sue me, whatever, school sucks), Trace must be really hard up for a date. I got this tacky floral arrangement today with balloons and shit. It seriously had those Little Pony things in it. WTF? They make me puke. I dumped the whole thing out to get to the candy.

Then I ate all the candy. Then I puked. No pony needed.

Tuesday, September 8, 2019

No so-called friends needed either. Except Drew.

Bitches.

Sunday, September 13, 2019

So Daddy is taking me to Homecoming. He’s totally clueless so Drew is getting everything together for him. He’s so cute worrying about matching flowers and cummerbunds to my dress.

Saturday, September 19, 2019

Went to the mall with Drew to pick out my shoes. My mom let me drive her car. Drew told me, in his logical Mr. Spock way, to buy flats so I did. Jamie will be disappointed with anything less than glass slippers for her princess. Mom will probably freak.

Monday, September 21, 2019

Trace managed to get a date. My ex-friend Tiff’s date got the flu.

Bitch.

Saturday, Sep[ember 27, 2019

Mom was actually cool about the flats. I wasn’t going to let her see my shoes but she snooped. They have little purple jewels on them that match the DRESS. I’m still nervous about the plunging neckline and fake boobs, but Jack came up with a solution. He bought me this gorgeous lacy shawl to cover up with. Mom actually said it was pretty and then gave me her amethyst earrings to wear. She told me about her prom. I had no idea she went with my dad. Weird.

Saturday, October 3, 2019

So, Homecoming. Like I’m all dressed and Jamie is telling me I really am a real princess for really real and Mom and Jack are taking all kinds of pictures. Then this fabulous purple I kid you not PURPLE Porsche drives up. We all back away from the window to wait for the doorbell to ring. And there he is. Not Daddy. DREW! WTF?! He is wearing the purple cummerbund and holding out the perfect corsage of purple orchids. I DIED!!! Totally. Jack and Mom had no idea who he was. I introduced him as Drew, my BEST FRIEND! It was totally a set-up. Daddy never had any intention of being my date. The tux fit Drew perfectly and he had even taken DANCING LESSONS! We had the best time EVER!

Wednesday, October 7, 2019

Mom decided to take Jamie to church tonight. Drew called and asked if he could come over. Jack said okay just not too late school night blah blah. So Drew asks can we take a walk. He’s like super quiet at first then finally he says, like all in one breath, “Will you be my girlfriend and go on real dates with me?” I freaked out for maybe a second and then I can’t believe it but I said YES! Then he said, “Thank you,” and kissed me ON THE CHEEK and held my hand on the way back to the house.

I have a BOYFRIEND!

Wednesday, again

Mom just called. She said they were like halfway home when Jamie realized she left her purse at church. I can’t believe my mom would go back to look for it. Maybe her mid-life crisis is over. Ha ha. I can’t wait til they get back so I can tell Jamie her princess has a Prince Charming.

I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!!

Saturday, October 10, 2019

….Daddy just started to walk away. I stopped him and said, “Hey, shouldn’t I, like, go live with you now?” Then he told me. He told me that when Jack married Cat he gave them full custody of me. He told me that he only ever had just visitation rights. He told me that he was my real father and he loved me, but Jack is my real dad and I belong with him now. Then he just walked back to his Jeep. I watched the bald spot on the back of his head receding away from me.

Then Jack walked up and handed me a Kleenex. I said, “Let’s go home, Dad.”