Disease Struck

“I need to see a doctor!” a woman, in goth black attire urged as she leaned against the counter. Breathe reeking of onion and alcohol spilled over.                                    

The nurses currently working at this urgent care covered their mouths which were already covered by masks. “Okay have you been here before?”  The nurse asked in the sweetest voice she could muster.

 “Of course not” The woman’s jet black hair looked frazzled, like she had just been electrified or had just discovered electricity.  

Everyone waiting in the doctor’s office held their breath as the nurse responded “Okay, well let’s start by getting this filled out.”

As the woman took the clipboard a slimy cough escaped her lungs spontaneously. Phlegm and saliva splashed on the counter top, and the nurse felt wetness against her cheek. The nurse quickly removed it with a Lysol wipe.

 The woman sat in her seat and began frantically scribbling in her personal information.

When she walked back up to the counter, the woman asked, “you didn’t have a box to check if you have Budweiser Bacteria.”

Like a live animal who had just been surprised by a pair of oncoming head lights, she froze.

She was stunned in her chair, so the woman set the clipboard down on the counter.

In a dramatic surprise a woman screamed, “oh my God did you say Budweiser?” before running out of the room.

When the woman yelled, “society is coming apart woman, wake up!” The nurse shook her head and looked at the helpless woman.  

 “It’s a recent issue, plus that section is for pre existing conditions.”

The woman began erupting in another noisy coughing fit as she meandered back to her chair. The entire room of patient’s were waiting against the walls, covering their mouths, avoiding eye contact, and fidgeting their feet.

Her anxiety rose in increments as the words Budweiser repeated themselves. Full blown panic began to swell inside her and her heart began to race.  Frightened of staying and frightened of leaving, she sat their stewing in indecision. Her corpse kept appearing in her mind; an inevitable thought that struck a chord with her psyche like a sour note. Every time the woman looked over for assurance, the group of nurses looked away.

Then another patient suddenly got up and ran out of the room while screaming “Budweiser.” A few patients follow behind her, while a mother and son held each other in a chair, sobbing , at the corner of the room.

Well apparently people are having a worse day than me. The woman thought to herself. Finally, the woman’s name is called.

“Trina!”

“That was fast,” she commented as she was buzzed through the door, where she was led into exam room number one. Sweat beading at her forehead, she took a seat at the exam table. Sitting across from her was the doctor. He wore a long white coat, a mask on his face, and a shiny metal nametag that read Dr. Stone.

“So whad brings you hurr?”

Trina did a double take. “I came here, because I can’t stop coughing and I’m sweating a lot.”

“Uh huh,” the doctor nodded along.

“I have a serious pain in my back that I can feel whenever I help people move, and recently I started to notice my fingers hurt when I am typing on the computer. I have a strange growth happening on the bottom of my feet and they are itching all the time.”  

The doctor interrupted, “let’s see,” he said as he pulled out his stethoscope.

“Where are you from?” Trina asked.

The Doctor laughed, “I got that awl duh time I’m from right hurr.”

Trina smiled as the doctor took her vitals and checked her lungs. “Take trdee deep braeeths.”

“How much longer do you think I have left?” She burst out.

“You should be fune.”

“No, it’s already spread here.”

“Oh,” the doctor awes.“We no avva a test foah Budweiser.”

 Trina’s entire face turns red as she begins to sink into rage. “You don’t have a test?” She asked with a menacing tone.

The doctor shook his head. “We do avva a test for Budweiser.”

“Oh thank god.” Trina felt relieved.

The Doctor continued.“I Went’n ordeer dhat for you.”

 “You won’t order that for me?”

He corrected himself again. “I will ordeer dhat for you.”

Trina seemed satisfied. “Okay I read online that I might need to get a flu shot to try and fight any possible new infections.”

“That wooln’t be bad idear.” He said scratching his chin, “but I wooln’t recommend.”

“Oh thank god.” She said turning her shoulder towards him and lifting up her sleeve.

 “Hurr,” he said handing her a paper slip.

“Where didja wanna to pick thdeese up fram?” He asked sitting at his desk, and typing at the keyboard, as the images scrolled on his screen.

“Can you have them sent to the pharmacy on Birmingham Boulevard?”

“Sure dhing.”

He took some of her blood and let her know, “We caull you’s when weeze gets duh results in dhree dhays.”

She walked out of there clutching her prescription. At the pharmacy, the line was outside of the store. She waited in line for hours at the pharmacy. Inside the store, there was nothing left on the shelves. Entire rows of food and supplies were completely empty. She noticed two woman fighting over the last remaining can of Chef Boyardee.

When she got home she looked at the small armada of drugs she had in her purse now. Ugly smelling liquids, capsules of funny dust, and huge horse pills laid on her counter top. She guzzled them down, tearing into the paper bag to quickly and failing to read the warning labels on the bottles.

She laid on the floor with her cats and stroked their underbellies as she cried. Minutes later she hopped on Facebook, pulling her laptop open.

“Budweiser got me.” She messaged everyone directly.

Trina’s phone began to ring, when she looked at the caller ID she saw it was her mother. 

Her mother answered as Trina picked up, “honey what are you talking about on Facebook?”

“I have Budweiser,” Trina wailed.

“That can’t be true, did you go to the doctor?”

“I did and they did the testy thing, but just listen mom.” Trina coughed into the receiver.

“That doesn’t sound good,” her mother responded.

“I love you mom,” Trina began to cry some more.

 “I love you too daughter, but don’t you think you should wait till the results come back?”

“Why are you always trying to make me feel better mom?”

Trina begins to cry and continues to cry until she fell asleep on her floor.

In her dreams giant spores were attacking her, trying to suffocate. Always on the edge of the horizon, she would think she had escaped, and they would reappear.

When she woke up in her bed, she tried to cough, but only a weak hack came out. She looked at herself in the bathroom mirror and felt like her skin looked refreshed. She took all the medicine and stuck it in her bathroom cabinet.