A fork in my path

Eddie unlocked the door to the shop he’d managed for eight years and worked in for the ten years before that. As he closed the door, Eddie thought to himself; I can’t imagine what I missed all these years I’ve worked in this shop. It would probably make me sad to know what I missed, but I feel it’s entirely essential to my evolution as a human being to understand. Most every day for the past few months, he would have similar ponderings. I think I’ve taken a wrong turn, and now I’m on the wrong path.

Putting his code in to disable the alarm, Eddie reflected on his past conversations with co-workers and friends. When I tried to discuss my dilemma with friends, every time, they’d all just tell me I’ll lose everything I’d worked to achieve all these years.

Going through his morning routine. I’ve been in this same shop for almost twenty years. And while I don’t think it’s necessarily bad to be at one workplace for years, I think I’ve probably used being here as a distraction so that I won’t notice I’m not on my true path. I’ve gotten caught up in the world, thinking distractions like money, hobbies, employees, cell phones, TV, and other things were more important than being on a path of discovery.

Rearranging a table for the guests arriving soon, Eddie shook his head, disappointed at his apparent lack of courage to venture back into the world. Everything is fine here at work, but every day is identical to the one before. I don’t feel like any day in the future might include some accomplishment for me. There’s nothing that I’m doing differently or that I’m challenged to achieve. Looking around his little restaurant, Maybe I am comfortable here, but my life has become absolutely trite. If I stay, ignoring the desire to discover some truth, I’ll probably just become more disappointed in myself.

Straightening the books for the customers to read as if they might not enjoy their visit if the book they choose isn’t alphabetized and squared with the book next to it, Eddie shook his head at the complete lack of depth he was displaying but continued arranging the books just the same. I wonder if the missing piece I feel is the wisdom displayed by Lao Tzu in his teachings. Whatever amount my friends think I’ll suffer, I’ve got to change this path and maybe devote the rest of my life to discovering.

Turning to gaze out the nearest window before going to his office to finish up some paperwork, thought, The wisdom that I read about in the writings of Lao Tzu is doubtless the missing piece, and I have to find someone to guide me on that new path. I know my friends will all be disappointed in my decision, thinking that I’ll lose everything on what they think is a bizarre path.

Gazing at a garbage can across the street, Eddie thought, What if I give everything up here and don’t find any wisdom out there? Shrugging to himself, That’s just a risk I’ll have to take.

Eddie was designing his resignment letter as he opened the door to his office while simultaneously thinking of the famous yoga teacher and philosopher that might help him regain some truth.

Eddie departs a few weeks later, walking as Lao Tzu had undoubtedly done. As he gets to the forest’s edge, he sees a shadow dart behind a tree. Rounding the tree, he sees the being that had cast the shadow. Eddie said, “A dog.”

When Eddie appeared around the tree, the dog looked surprised and thumped his tail on the ground. As Eddie bent over to give the dog a pet, he thought, I hope this dog doesn’t follow me when I go down this path.

Eddie turned to walk down the path through the trees, and the dog stood with an expectant look in its eye. I can’t imagine a dog serving any useful purpose on my journey, and I’m sure Lao Tzu didn’t have one along. In an effort to travel as Lao Tzu had, Eddie put his index finger in the air and very clearly enunciated the word “Sit.”

Eddie had never had a dog around and didn’t know what to do with one. The dog, either not comprehending or having other plans, didn’t sit or do any of the other things that Eddie begged it to do. He looked nervously around the forest, shrugged, and turned to leave. 

The dog followed Eddie for the rest of the day, about 100 yards behind and usually just out of sight. Sometimes Eddie would turn around quickly enough to catch sight of the dog through the trees. He hiked until it got dark, then rummaged through his pack for the sleeping bag to spread on the ground.

Eddie opened his eyes to the morning light and a bird softly singing. He looked up through the leaves and rejoiced at having had the courage to leave his previous life. Excitedly, he thought, I’m on the way to visit the famous yoga teacher, and I wonder what wise words she’ll have for me when she discovers what I left behind. Rolling over in his sleeping bag, he noticed the dog sleeping next to him. With a sinking heart, thought, He must have snuck up next to me in the night.

He unzipped his sleeping bag, and the dog’s eyes immediately opened, exposing a sense of fear that this man might not tolerate him. Eddie remembered, just a few days ago, the hopelessness he felt in possibly being turned away in his time of need and not having anything to return to. His heart again sank, this time bonding with the dog over mutual angst.

Eddie searched his pack for the cheese and bread he put there yesterday. “I can’t just keep calling you dog; what’s your name?” Finding the bread, he turned to the dog to offer a slice. His tail started swaying as he gratefully accepted the slice. “Okay, I’ve got to call you something, so I’ll call you Spot.” The dog stopped chewing for a moment to expectantly scan Eddie’s face for a sign that he might try to send him off again. Now finding a gentleness in Eddie’s gaze, the dog returned his focus to the slice of bread.

Eddie put his sleeping bag in his pack. After slipping his arms through the loops and re-arranging the weight on his back, he started down the trail on his quest again. Almost as an afterthought, he called over his shoulder, “Are you coming, Spot?” The dog immediately jumped up and ran to join Eddie.

After a few hours of wandering along lonely paths, they came to a shallow stream crossing. Spot jogged into the water and started drinking while Eddie took off his pack and rested it against a tree. Kneeling next to the deepest part of the stream, he scooped water to bathe his sweaty face. Holding the next handful of water halfway to his face, Eddie paused, noticing a man silently watching him from across the stream.

“Hello. I’m sorry I didn’t see you there. You’re very quiet.” Looking up, Spot noticed the man Eddie was talking to and happily bounded over.

“Well, hello.” Crouching to pet the wet dog and shifting his gaze, “What’s your dog’s name?”

“In truth, he’s not mine, but I call him Spot. I found him yesterday. I’m traveling alone to go talk with a famous philosopher.”

Hearing Eddie’s reason for traveling, the man took his sandals off to wade across with Spot. “You must be seeking some answer to a question. I don’t see many people out here.” Making a vague circle pointing at the forest, “I’ve lived out here for a few years, and I miss talking to people.”

Eddie bristled at this new delay and looked regretfully down the path. “I’m seeking wisdom.”

The man nodded knowingly as he reached Eddie’s side of the stream. “I was a bank president for years but felt some critical piece was missed on that path, so I left all that behind.” With a smile, he pointed to the stream. “I’ve traded hot and cold running water in a house for water that simply runs.” He pointed with his chin to a clearing in the forest and said, “My camp is right over there; come rest for a bit.”

While retrieving his pack, Eddie tried to come up with some reason he’d have to be going but realized Lao Tzu probably didn’t have some timeline to adhere to, so he allowed himself a rest.

The ex-banker continued, “The biggest obstacle for me to hurdle was my friends and co-workers trying to convince me that I hadn’t missed anything and shouldn’t leave and seek a different path. I knew I’d missed something, though, and eventually, despite their protests, turned my back on all the things I’d acquired to go and find a new path.” Pointing to the dog next to Eddie, the ex-banker said, “The subtle message from that teacher will always indicate wisdom.”

Eddie glanced at Spot with eyebrows raised and a minute shake of his head.

“I’ve found the most important aspect of wisdom to be the spontaneous merging of the breath with whatever I happen to be doing.” Nodding toward the dog, “I’ve been wandering for years, and in all my travels, I’ve seen many dogs, most of whom were seriously undervalued. The natural teacher in them is almost always ignored.”

Eddie disregarded the comment about dogs and thought the banker might be referring to some esoteric yogic style of breathing that he hadn’t heard of before and should know. Eddie asked, “What do you mean merging?” He put his pack on the ground to sit near the ex-banker’s shelter and listen.

The ex-banker pointed at Spot. “Look.”

With a bewildered look, Eddie glanced down. “I just see a dog licking its paw.”

“Exactly. But there’s more. The dog never stops breathing, whatever he’s doing. I mean that merging is simply integrating breath with whatever you happen to be doing. It’s a straightforward trick humans can use to implement wisdom. Dogs have been with us for many years, silently pointing to the easiest path for us to take to wisdom.

Eddie pointed suspiciously at Spot and looked up through the branches with an inhale. “I’ve not even tried to link my breath with an event.” Eddie furrowed his brow, “You mean implementing wisdom is that simple?”

“Wisdom is not complicated or obtuse like some make it seem. It’s straightforward, and Spot is the best one to teach you. There’s no need for you to journey to discover wisdom or to alter what you attempt to achieve.”

The ex-banker leaned back against the tree. “You’ve heard the saying, ‘Please, GOD, let me be the person my dog thinks I am.’” Looking at Spot with a smirk, he said, “So all one has to do is be the person your dog thinks you are.”

Lifting his gaze to scrutinize Eddie, “From what I know of you, you’re a kind person. What stops you from giving this dog a home? It would be a total win for you because he would demonstrate the wisdom that you seek.”

“And I’d save all that time searching if I just kept a dog around.” Turning to Spot, “What do you think, dog? Do you want to travel with me?”

Turning to the ex-banker, “This seems too simple.”

“It’s not! It’s a serious life-long commitment to your personal development and to Spot!”

“I left my restaurant because that path didn’t include any kind of wisdom or personal development, but my path just didn’t include the commitment.” Looking at Soot, “Now I include that!”