Tipsy reader

I have to meet her in 45 minutes. Today I’m lucky because there is no one here. Not even that nerd who stays working on his papers till the closing time. He knows I can’t kick him out, so to get on my nerves, he raises exactly 3 minutes before 8 p.m, passes beside me to the door with a smug smirk. “Hey, I’m just legitimately using my 3 more minutes in the library, there is nothing you can do about it,” I bet that’s what he thinks. The sick nerd has control over me.

But today I can close even earlier, to make myself some extra time in a sweet anticipation of my date. We met 2 weeks ago and I still have the first dates rush and I enjoy it, damn it! It’s my first experience with a woman older than me, but I barely feel the age difference, we are just like two silly teenagers! So, let’s wrap it up, I can’t wait anymore!

It was just when I switched off the computer when I heard someone rustling by the door. Not a visitor, please not a visitor! But despite my praying, it was the fuck of a visitor, some old dude! Ok, 15 minutes till 8 p.m, I still have time. Taking a deep breath, I said:

"Hey, how can I help you?"

But didn’t get an immediate answer. The man walked slowly to my table, head down.

"Hello," he finally spoke and I was struсk by the strongest odor of booze. At least now when he is drunk, the law is on my side and I can get rid of him. 

"Sorry, sir. You might have missed the door. The bar is down the street."

"I know but a library is where I should be right now," I had to admit he was lucid for the one who probably drank his own mother.

"See, we’re closing in like 13 minutes..."

"I’m late for everything, even for the library..." he sighed and I couldn’t help but notice that his eyes were wet. What the hell happened to this dude...

"Ok, let’s see if I can help you with something in 12 minutes," I tried to speed up the process, getting to the point.

"It’s just that…I think my wife is having an affair."

Oh man, I thought, he is drunk plus he is one of those who likes chatting with the staff about their grandmothers, girlfriends, pets and all the personal shit.

"So, I still wonder what can I do for you, sir...here, in the library…"

"People are looking for answers in the libraries, aren’t they? Every book is a story that teaches us something," jesus, we are going into a philosophical drunk abyss, "I’ve always been an avid reader and you know what, seems like I didn’t learn a thing…I still managed to lose my wife."

"And your question to me would be…?" I looked at my watch.

"I’ve been married for almost 10 years," speaking of which, 10 is the number of minutes that’s left till I have to close the place and run to my woman, dammit! "I was the happiest and so was she, as I imagined. We met in summer in Costa Rica and spent the whole night talking, kissing, touching. I was in my thirties at that time, and had already given up the idea of finding such connection and intimacy with someone," he fell into a chair in front of me.

"I’m very sorry…"

"We got married 5 months later in Italy," he interrupted me but, to be honest, at this point I was moved and let him talk, "nothing seemed impossible to me back then. So, we just got there with our friends and had a simple but beautiful wedding in a little village."

"And what has changed since then?"

"You won’t believe it, but just 3 or something weeks ago I was as happy as the first day I met her. I didn’t look like a hobo and I never got so drunk. Then, I started to feel that when she is physically with me, her mind is somewhere else. I try not to notice her typing on the phone when we are about to sleep. I try to be a “modern man” and give her more “space”. I made my peace with “girls night out” 3 times a week..."

"Such sociable girls they are," I made a failed attempt to cheer him up with a joke.

"I’m losing her more and more with each day, and I don’t even have guts to talk about it with her. If it hurts so much now, where will I find the courage to face the last hit of pain?"

"I wish I could do something for you."

"I need a book," it’s the last thing you need right now, man, I thought, "a book with answers. I wanna know what did I do wrong."

6 minutes till closing time, 21 minutes till my date and I just had the most difficult (and the most ridiculous, let’s face it) order. 

"Sir, I’m afraid we don’t have a book on such a particular topic in our catalog."

He stared at me for a few seconds and then shifted the gaze to the floor and sighed. For god sakes, I can’t advise him Madame Bovary, unless I want to finish him off.

"It’s just that," I continued, "library is an experience, you have to read a lot to find what resonates with you and when you finally do, you dig deeper, reflect and eventually look at your life from the angle that this book offers."

"You are a really nice guy," he smiled at me.

"Thanks," 3 minutes, I think I'll make it to the date in time. She hates when I’m late.

"I feel so stupid. Going to the library to find out what makes me such an asshole, so that my wife is cheating on me with a young guy," he weakly laughed and rubbed his eyes, "I’m really sorry." 

"You don’t have to be."

"At least now you have a funny story to tell your friends over the beer. “Guess what, the other day a drunk old guy showed up to our library and made a fool of himself”."

"Let’s keep it our secret, sir."

"Deal," he laughed again and we shook hands.

He slowly went to the door.

"I hope everything will be alright with your wife, sir, and that you find your special connection again. Maybe it sounds ridiculous from an immature fella like me but I mean it." I was in a hurry but I felt such a huge empathy for this crazy man, that I really wanted to let him go with something cheerful. "Your marriage doesn’t seem to be a bullshit one, I’m sure there is a way to fix it."

"I’ll try. I love her. I love my Laura."

"Laura," I echoed him. A chill ran up my back, "good luck to you and Laura," my throat went dry.

He gave me a weary smile and left.

I sit back in my chair and stare blankly in front of myself. I look at the watch on my hand, still covered with goosebumps. I have a date in 11 minutes. But I think I’ll stay in my library today.