Paradise Lost

Day 1, on my own

The others have gone. After marching for days, we’d stopped for a few minutes to rest. I closed my eyes for what felt like seconds. When I woke up, I’m not even sure if on the same day, they were gone. I looked around and saw no one in sight.

We’d been marching in lockstep and following our commander without question, as we’ve always done. So, I hadn’t bothered to pay attention, nor was given any information, about where we were or where we were headed at the time.

I noticed that, it had clearly rained as I had rested, which threw off my senses to find my way back on my own. I think the sky might’ve even fallen enough to carry me away from where our unit had stopped. I’m honestly surprised I’m still alive.

But how did they leave me behind? I know there’s a lot of us, but didn’t they notice they were one short?

More importantly, where in the world do I go now?

As I looked around me, everything looked the same. Grass and trees for miles behind and ahead. What even is “behind” and “ahead”, when everything looks the same? If I pick one direction to follow, how can I be so sure it’s the correct one?

The “correct one” would be whatever takes me back to base camp. It’ll be embarrassing, sure, to admit that I fell asleep, was left behind by our unit, possibly carried and nearly drowned by the rain, and almost couldn’t find my way back. But at least then, I’ll be back.

I just have to get back.

Day 2

So, I chose a direction. I still am no clearer on if it was the right direction, but it was a direction. It was a choice. And I guess we’ll find out soon enough whether it was the right choice.

Still too wet around to sense anything, so, just kind of winging it. The miles of nothing but grass and trees have gone on. And I’ve just walked and walked, and walked and walked. I didn’t see much out of the ordinary. A chirping ball of fluff and wings in the tree, here. What looked like a few of those winged bloodsuckers circling around, there. A few flying flaps of color fluttering about.

Thankfully, the ample vegetation is allowing me to survive on the land. I would wish for more water again, to help ensure I remain hydrated, but then I may never get back. For now, the leftover droplets will have to do.

Day 3

Today was slightly terrifying. There was this huge being that crossed my path. It was several times my size, with long, hairy legs and big, black, beady eyes. I thought I’d almost die just by looking at it. Luckily, I saw it before it saw me, so I was able to hide. I remember our commander used to tell us about those things, saying they’re more afraid of us than we are of them, but I don’t buy it. Yes, maybe they’re more afraid when there’s a lot more of us and just one of them. But it’s just one of me now.

I made sure I kept my distance.

Day 4

I think I covered around two or three miles today. Not too bad. Especially, considering. But pretty whooped and looking forward to tonight’s rest.

Day 5

It’s weird.

I would think I would’ve either ran into my fellow troops or base camp by now, but I’ve still come across neither. Just me. Still.

I’m still okay on food. In fact, I came across a particular treat today. It was a massive berry. I’m unsure what kind, but it seemed safe to eat — nonpoisonous. It was extremely sweet and juicy. Probably the best thing I’ve tasted in a while. It sustained me for the day — I really didn’t need much else after that.

Day 6

It’s been eerily quiet for a while now. No one around. Nothing. Not a soul. Except for me.

I can’t quite figure it out. I am convinced now that I chose the wrong direction that while back, but it seems too late to correct it. And even then, I can’t say with complete certainty that it was the wrong direction. Maybe it was neither of those directions. Was there a third or fourth option I hadn’t noticed?

Nonetheless, here we are now. It’s quiet, desolate. It feels like no one has been here in years, if ever. Where have I ended up? How did I end up here? Sigh. I’m just ready to be back home. Back at camp, with everyone else.

Day 7

It rained again today, which was nice for the coolness but not so great for helping me find my way back. 

Even still, despite the rain, I somehow began smelling this warm, sweet, intoxicating aroma. It wasn’t the kind of scent I needed. But man, it was everything I wanted.

The sweetest, most beautiful fragrance that ever found me. It’s hard to describe, but it’s like, if temptation had a scent, that would be it. The closest thing I can liken it to is a combination of strawberries, cherries, honey, lemon, a hint of cinnamon, and pure joy. I mean that. Pure joy. And that description still doesn’t do it justice. It’s truly indescribable.

I couldn’t tell where the scent was coming from, but it seems like the kind of thing you need to find. I felt drawn to it — almost like, as I smelled it, not much else mattered. Like I couldn’t resist or even care about anything else.

As I continued walking, the smell intensified, so I sense that I’m getting closer, whatever it is. I wonder if it’s a sign of life? A sign of others around, who might be able to help me? I guess I’ll soon see.

Day 8

That scent is the most intense yet. I’m definitely close, and the closer I get, the more badly I want — the more badly I need — it. It’s sucking me in…little by little. I think it actually made me move faster, covering an extra mile or two for the day than I had before. It’s like it awakens something in my body, in my spirit and mind. It motivates me. It excites me. I can’t wait to get to the source. It smells like it’ll taste like the greatest thing I’ve ever eaten.

Day 9

I found it.

I think.

I encountered what appears to be a large, cubed structure of some sort. It appears mostly red and hard, with intersecting horizontal lines of white throughout. I’ve never seen anything quite like it before, but I did notice, whatever it is, I’m pretty sure that’s where the aroma is coming from.

Although I still didn’t see anyone else around and am looking out for help to get back to camp, I was cautious, as this seemed like a very unfamiliar area.

But that aroma. I’ve got to get to that aroma. I just have to do so…carefully.

Day 10

With the few days since the last rain, things have been finally warming and drying up enough for me to regain my key sense to lead me home. But it was difficult to sense much, with that one scent so powerful — the most powerful it’s been yet.

As I got closer to that structure and to the aroma, I noticed other weird things I’ve never seen before. This was more than an unfamiliar area. It was like an unfamiliar world. Another planet, almost.

No longer was I covered overwhelmingly by trees as before and as I’ve only ever known. Instead, more scattered, bare branches sprinkled the sky above me, with the sun taking over and bearing down on me as if it were unapologetically disregarding their meager attempt at shade.

I came upon ground that was no longer grass or dirt but this odd, firm, black material that seemed to bake even worse in the growing heat and therefore was challenging to walk on.

On that ground, I saw this large, orange, seemingly textured circle with black lines. The crisp breeze, which I generally welcomed from the increasingly merciless sun, actually pushed it slightly in my direction, nearly crushing me. I had to jump out of the way, just in time. A very close call.

I also saw beautiful flowers of color blooming at the bottom of the big, red structure. Petals in hues of pink and blue, yellow and red. Many plants of different kinds. Another great spread of culinary options, but my sights were on bigger prey. That aroma.

I’m now right outside the large red structure. Tomorrow, I go in.

Day 11

I found my way in the structure. Through a hole I was surprised actually made it quite easy.

Once inside, I instantly noticed the aroma had somehow intensified around one-hundred times more than before. It was almost overpowering.

I could barely think straight — so much so that I barely noticed the additional unfamiliar phenomena that surrounded me.

For one, what I walked on now was this light, fluffy matter. Definitely softer than the last, rigid, and hot ground outside, but also strange — definitely not grass.

Because it’s so soft and unlike anything I’ve ever walked on, it took some getting used to, but once I did, I actually kind of liked it. Definitely beats walking on that hard, hot ground. Or in the grass after rain.

I also saw lots of massive structures throughout. Nothing I could identify, but certainly all far outweighing my small frame in comparison.

Unsure of how they work or what they do — if they’re living or if they can move — I stayed away and tried to keep my eye on the prize.

Day 12

I saw it. Where the aroma is coming from.

It’s yet another strange structure. Actually, there are a bunch of them! In different directions. Luckily, these look more my size. They aren’t huge, like everything else. They actually almost feel like they were built specifically for me. For me and others like me.

They’re these black sort of buildings, with an attached walkway each leading up to a single opening to go inside. I went inside one.

In it was this gigantic pool, much bigger than me, of…something. The irresistible “something” that I’ve been sensing nonstop for the past several days. And here it was, right in front of me.

It contained this clear, thick substance. Kind of gooey. Like a gooey swimming pool. But it smelled so magnificent. So…powerful. I immediately wanted to dive in.

I checked a few of the other buildings, and they were the same. Pools and pools of this gooey goodness. I couldn’t believe my eyes and nose!

I thought of how whatever this stuff is would help feed so many of our friends, troops, and, most importantly, our up-and-comers and our Queen back at camp. I felt a mix of glee that I had found it, knowing how much it would help, but also shame, disappointment, and frustration, that I didn’t have nearly enough strength or equipment with me to bring back all of it.

So, I decided I’ll just try to bring back as much as I can, make a note to tell the others, and leave as much of my scent behind as possible, so they can come for the rest.

I haven’t tasted it yet because I don’t think I deserve to. I can enjoy it when the others can also. And I need to remain focused. If this stuff tastes anywhere near as wonderfully as it smells, I’ll never want to leave. I’ll never want to do anything.

Tomorrow, I will plan to gather up what I can and head on my way.

Day 13

Today, I made a sack out of this large leaf, filled it with as much as I could of this stuff, and headed back on the road.

The sun has still been around, and it last rained almost a week ago, so things are definitely looking up for picking up my camp’s scent. I just have to first get far away from the great aroma, to give it any kind of chance of actually breaking through.

Day 14

The sun has been unrelenting. Walking a few miles, especially with this sack, feels like hundreds with that bright yellowness beaming down harshly on me. And, although I’m back where there are trees aplenty, I find them little help. Sometimes, it’s as if they’re bare, with no shade at all. But there’s actually technically plenty of shade. It’s odd.

But on, I go.

Day 15

Another scary day.

This time, I saw before me an even larger creature than the leggy, hairy one before — around ten times the size, green, and slimy. I knew I was in special trouble if this one caught me in its crosshairs, especially being slowed down with the sack. 

I hid behind a grass blade as I watched its tongue extend several inches to scoop up dinner of different kind.

I made sure I wasn’t part of the meal.

Day 16

I found it. The scent to get me back to camp. It first began pretty faint. I could barely sense it at all. But I as I kept marching forward, it thickened little by little. Enough to let me know I was headed in the right direction.

The sun has still been unforgiving, but I continued to push on.

Day 17

The combination of my hunger and that overwhelming aroma got the best of me today. I finally succumbed and dug into the stash for a taste — just to tie me over until I reach base camp. And I know I’m close. I could see the top of it from afar.

The taste was remarkable. It was unlike anything I’ve ever tasted. It was sweet — so sweet, it felt like my tastebuds were beaming. I could feel each of the flavors. Not just taste them but literally feel them. My favorite was honey, which coated me like a cozy blanket on a cold day.

I will say that it had a bit of aftertaste, but I barely noticed, as what came before it was so delightful, that didn’t even matter. I could eat that stuff again and again, but of course, I had to stop myself. I planned to save most for the others.

Day 18

I definitely see camp in sight. It’s crazy to think I actually hadn’t been that far from it all along. I feel so close, although… for some reason, it seems like the closer I get to it, the harder it’s getting to go on.

I feel like I’m getting weaker by the second. My muscles are declining. Feels like I might even be losing weight rather rapidly. I feel lighter, but not in a good way. Everything I’m carrying feels heavier. Even my vision has seemed blurrier — things starting to appear in double.

Day 19

My body must really be exhausted from this journey because I’ve been feeling more sluggish, out of it, and unmotivated the last couple of days. My appetite is leaving me — in fact, I don’t think I ate all day today or yesterday and have barely thought of food. Not even that is enticing me any longer to partake.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel the weakest I’ve ever felt. I can barely move my arms or legs. I can’t speak. It feels like a large chore to take each breath.

I think back to the last couple of days, to try and understand what might’ve caused this. Did I step on something that caused an infection and I hadn’t noticed? Did I breathe some kind of toxic gas somewhere along the way? I know there was that gooey goodness a few days ago, but…no, no. That couldn’t possibly be it. No way. It was the best thing I’ve ever smelled or tasted. I smile at the memory. Even thinking about it has me momentarily feeling slightly okay. 

Day 20

I’m close.

As I’m writing this, I am near enough to camp that I believe I see a few from camp in the distance who might actually see me. Or maybe I’m hallucinating, I don’t know.

Yes, they do see me. A sea of black, more and more are accumulating to come my way.

Thousands of young solders-to-be. Tens of thousands of my troop sisters and brothers, on ground and in the air. Even the Queen.

I see her. I see them all.

They run towards me so excitedly. I can’t tell if it’s more so because of me or because of what I have with me, but I wouldn’t doubt if the latter. Clearly, this aroma has awakened and greatly excited them, long before I approached this far, and they’d been anxiously awaiting to see what exactly it was—what it’s been coming from.

Through my foggy eyes, I just barely see their big eyes and wide mouths behind bodies of eager anticipation.

To my fellow troops and broader family, when you see this and if I don’t make it by the time you arrive… I brought back this glorious…stuff. Just smell it, and you’ll see what I mean. Tasting it is even better. 

And just follow the scent of it for more. There are pools and pools of it.

Even though I feel my last breaths escaping me and the worst I’ve ever felt in one way, I also feel the best. As I know I will leave behind this legacy — this glorious sustenance that you can retrace, go get more of, and feed many generations to come.

And with the first drop, you’ll feel and be overcome by the epitome of life and joy as I have.