A Case of Mistaken Secret Identity

Part I

As a night-shift barista in Corner City, Riley Gardner had two top fears. Top Fear Number 1: Getting robbed at work (the Night Owl Café’s hours were 10:00pm to 5:00am). Top Fear Number 2: Meeting a villain. She’d never expected both to happen at once.

Riley did as she’d been trained: opened the register, raised her hands, and stepped back. “Take it. It’s yours.”

“Huh?” The Scale-Head scratched his head, then paused when his fingers felt the bumpy leather of his cowl. “Shit.” Behind his domino mask, his eyes were bleary and bloodshot. “Forgot to change after my shift.”

Scale-Heads worked for Draco Rex, Corner City’s most ruthless villain. They dressed like medieval archers, with leather cowls, belts, fingerless gauntlets, and boots specially crafted and dyed to resemble dragon skin. According to rumor, Draco Rex’s artisan made each cowl as unique as a retinal scan.

“You’re not… robbing me?” Riley was confused because something about his body language or vocal pattern had caused the Amalgorithm to assess this short, gawky Scale-Head as a threat and forecast her survivability at 48%.

Like many people, Riley had a low-level power. Her brain retained an amalgamation (“Amalg-”) of every fact or skill she ever learned and constantly ran a computational algorithm (“-orithm”) which extrapolated likely conclusions based on input data. Thus, “Amalgorithm.” The upside was that the Amalgorithm was almost never wrong. The downside was that it ran in her subconscious, so she had only average intelligence unless it provided her with a conscious output.

“Nah. I’m off the clock.” The Scale-Head dropped some change on the counter. “I’ll take a cinnamon hazelnut mocha non-fat latte, extra whip, extra espresso. Make it iced.”

“Coming right up.” He was $0.14 short, but Riley wasn’t going to tell him that.

The Scale-Head slumped into a chair and rested his forehead on his arms. She wondered if she could text the G.U.A.R.D. (Global Unified Alliance of Regional Defenders) emergency number without him seeing. Towns too small for an R.D. (Regional Defender) still used 911 for police, but Corner City texted “HELP” to 48273 (which spelled GUARD on the keypad) or else used the panic button in the G.U.A.R.D app. Either option would send a distress signal and ping her location.

“You know what sucks?” The Scale-Head laughed wryly and looked up.

“What’s that?” Riley tried to sound casual as she grabbed the cinnamon near her bag so he wouldn’t realize she’d been reaching for her phone.

“I can’t even expense that coffee. No per diem in villainy, and the pay for us rank and files ain’t shit.” A vein bulged under his clenched jaw. “But Draco Rex was the only guy hiring violent convicts after the government canned me from my programming job. I finally started finding hacking gigs, but I can’t take them without giving the boss half the cut. And I can’t quit, since our retirement plan is…” He traced a finger across his throat. “I only get out if this job gets me dead or G.U.A.R.D. locks me up the rest of my life. Or else, I’d need to…” He paused. “Huh. That’s an interesting idea.”

“Your coffee’s ready.” Riley set the cup on the counter and backed away. She didn’t like how he was looking her up and down.

“Riley, huh?” He glanced at her nametag. “That’s one of those names for boys and girls, right?”

The Scale-Head was like a serpent that had gone from peacefully sunning himself to rearing for a strike. He pressed something on his mask, and two yellow lenses extended over the eye holes.

The Amalgorithm lowered survivability to 28%. Riley wanted to run, but she was transfixed by the light pulsating from the Scale-Head’s eyes.

“Just relax, Riley.” The Scale-Head smiled. “You’re about to get an exciting new career opportunity.”

Part II

Riley woke with a pounding headache. She tried to rub the bump on the back of her head, but something jerked her wrists. She looked down, and cold sweat broke across her brow.

Two things were on her wrists that shouldn’t be: (1) a pair of handcuffs linked to a chain, which was bolted to the floor under her chair and (2) a custom set of dragon-hide fingerless gauntlets.

Riley didn’t know what was happening, but she had a new Top Fear Number 1: Waking up handcuffed and dressed as a Villain, with no idea where she was or how she’d gotten there.

“You’re in G.U.A.R.D. Headquarters. The Scale Head used his Mesmer-Eyes on you. That’s why you don’t’ remember.”

Riley jumped. It was a conscious output from the Amalgorithm, but it was loud, like a second voice in her head. Until now, conscious outputs had come to her as knowledge. Her brain was like a bingo ball mixer, with data bubbling around inside until a ball popped out for her to read.

The Amalgorithm continued: “Mesmer-Eyes are an optical weapon that pulse light to induce an instantaneous hypnotic and suggestible state. Scale-Heads use Mesmer-Eyes to subdue security guards, coerce bank managers into opening vaults, gain access to secure areas—that kind of thing.”

“Since when do you talk?”

“Who are you talking to?” A woman’s voice spoke from behind—one Riley recognized from news interviews. “We swept you for comms, and this room is shielded from Telepaths.” Blank, Corner City’s premier R.D., walked into view and stood on the other side of the table in front of Riley. She was holding a manilla folder.

For five seconds, Riley was speechless. Finally, she managed, “Just myself.”

Riley had learned people didn’t like finding out everything they said or did in her presence was recorded and logged in a massive dataset. She especially didn’t want to annoy a Telekinetic R.D. who already looked angry.

“Blank isn’t Telekinetic,” the Amalgorithm corrected her. “She controls the space between objects, not the objects themselves.”

The fact the Amalgorithm was not only talking but also hearing and responding to her thoughts disturbed Riley, but she had bigger problems at the moment. “Um… why am I handcuffed?”

“You don’t remember robbing someone at gunpoint this morning? I must have hit you harder than I thought.” Blank smirked at Riley’s stupefied stare. “And before you lie to me about being innocent, or Mesmerized, or the other things you Scale-Heads always say, you should know our Telepath already scanned you while you were unconscious.”

That made no sense. A Telepath should have seen that she was innocent and Mesmerized.

“Unfortunately, the Scale-Head implanted memories of working for Draco Rex. They think you’re the genuine article.”

Blank pulled a photo from the folder and laid it on the table. It was a still from security footage which showed a Scale-Head holding a young man at gunpoint. Geometric dots and lines were superimposed on the image, mapping the cowl pattern. Apparently, the rumors about cowls being unique were true.

“This is you, robbing Riley Gardner before I knocked you out.” Blank tapped her finger on the photo.

Riley blinked, then mentally rewound and played back the last three seconds of conversation. Surely, she had heard wrong.

Riley opened her mouth to argue, but the Amalgorithm jumped in. “Before you say anything, read the timestamp.”

“Here’s you again,” Blank pulled out more security stills with geometric lines. “Our software identified you at four violent attacks in the last year—including the home invasion at the mayor’s mansion.”

But Riley had stopped listening. For a second, she forgot even to breathe. The timestamp on the first photo, which Blank had said was taken that morning, was dated three days after she was attacked.

“Think it through.” The Amalgorithm said. “The Scale-Head was a programmer and hacker with knowledge of government systems. He’s your approximate age, height, and weight. He had three days to break into databases. Your name is unisex, so he only needed to swap in his photo and gender marker on your records. And he got all your accounts and passwords from you while you were Mesmerized. Like it or not, he’s Riley Gardner now.”

The Amalgorithm was right: If records proved the Scale-Head was her, nothing she or anyone else could say would change G.U.A.R.D.’s mind. But if the Scale-Head was her, and she had fake Scale-Head memories and his uniform, then that made her… the patsy.

This wasn’t just an identity switch. It was a set-up. She’d been hypnotized to rob the fake “Riley Gardner” (a.k.a. the Scale-Head), placing her in the cowl that linked her to the other crimes. Then the Scale-Head had called the R.D. to arrest her. Draco Rex would think his henchman was in G.U.A.R.D. custody, Riley would rot in jail in the Scale-Head’s place, and the Scale-Head would saunter off with Riley’s life.

“Oh… crap.” Riley was going to be in prison for a long, long time.

“Fortunately for you,” Blank flicked her hand, and the cuffs fell open, “G.U.A.R.D. has authorized me to make you a deal.”

Part III

Riley hovered a thousand feet above a parking garage. Blank’s power pressed her gently from all sides, like she was suspended in a giant gelatin mold.

“You pull this off, you get immunity.” Blank handed Riley her new domino mask. “You tip off anyone, I make sure you get a life sentence.”

“Got it.” Riley fastened on the mask. She didn’t need any Scale-Heads realizing they didn’t recognize her. New Top Fear Number 1: Getting killed infiltrating a Dragon Den.

“Tech support replaced your Mesmer-Eyes with camera lenses. They won’t retract, so say it’s broken if anyone asks. I’ll be monitoring you with this.” Blank held up a tablet. “There’s an earpiece and microphone wired into your cowl. To avoid compromising you, I won’t speak unless needed.”

The deal was simple: Slip in, clone a hard drive, slip out, deliver the cloned drive to G.U.A.R.D., and go free. Once that was done, she could worry about getting her life back. Riley pulled the cowl over her head. “Let’s get this over with.”

Part IV

According to G.U.A.R.D.’s intelligence, the garage elevator would take Riley to a secret subbasement, where an adjoining tunnel would lead to a private elevator under a nearby office building. The first six floors were legitimate businesses, but the seventh was a rumored Dragon Den. G.U.A.R.D. believed the hard drive would lead them to the other Dens and ultimately to Draco Rex.

Riley stepped onto the first elevator and looked at the button panel. It listed floors 1 through 4. No subbasement.

“Give it a second. The camera will scan your cowl.”

Sure enough, the elevator lurched into motion on its own. That had been lucky… too lucky.

The Amalgorithm could (1) recall necessary information, like about the Mesmer-Eyes and Blank’s powers and (2) extrapolate conclusions based on data and sensory input, like reading the Scale-Head’s threat level or realizing their identities were switched. It did not make educated guesses without having received input from her.

Come to think of it, how had the Amalgorithm known about the implanted memories when she didn’t? And its explanation about the identity switch—it had talked like it knew, not like it had computed a probable scenario.

“Mesmer-Eyes put the conscious mind to sleep, not the sub-conscious mind.” The Amalgorithm supplied. “I watched the Scale-Head perform the necessary tasks to assume your identity. He also provided me with several detailed trainings on his job, coworkers, and building access and layouts to fool G.U.A.R.D.’s Telepath. This mission is doable so long as you follow my lead.”

Okay, that explained how it knew some things. It did not explain how the Amalgorithm could hear her side of the brain, or why it had a voice now.

The Amalgorithm heard this line of inquiry, too. “Mesmer-Eyes are designed to hypnotize the victim for one hour. You were Mesmerized for approximately 36 hours. The Scale-Head put his mask on you and used a previously unknown ‘reverse camera’ Mesmer-Eyes function to keep you continuously hypnotized. He did this to prevent your escape, but he also thought this would permanently alter your mind to believe you were truly a Scale-Head, which would have made his deception perfect. Theoretically, it would have worked on a normal person, but I shielded your consciousness from damage. However, this prolonged exposure still resulted in… side effects.”

Riley waited for the Amalgorithm to go on. She wanted to ask, but Blank wouldn’t appreciate hearing her question her own sanity mid-mission.

“You have no lasting physical damage. But my processes and your conscious thoughts are now permanently entangled. This is why we can communicate now versus merely exchanging inputs and outputs. It’s an adjustment for me, too.”

Riley was so stunned she nearly walked smack into the next elevator’s doors. Fortunately, they opened automatically in time. She pressed the only button in the elevator, which would take her directly to the Dragon’s Den on the seventh floor.

Riley thought her new Top Fear Number 2: The unknown ramifications of her power being permanently altered by a mind control device. Yet again, both top fears were happening at once.

Part V

The elevator doors opened to a fluorescent-lit bullpen filled with empty cubicles. G.U.A.R.D. intelligence said most Scale-Heads operated at night, which was why they chose this time to infiltrate. It also helped that G.U.A.R.D. had kept her arrest quiet, so she wouldn’t be immediately suspicious if spotted.

“The server room is at the end of that hall. I’ll walk you through overriding the security panel. Your cowl doesn’t rank high enough for access. Survivability is projected at 62%.”

“Nelson! Hey, Nelson!” A Scale-Head walked toward her holding a coffee. In her earpiece, Riley heard Blank swear.

“Survivability now at 41%.” The Amalgorithm wasn’t happy. “You’re Nelson. Pretend you have laryngitis and make an excuse to leave.”

“I saw you’d badged in.” The Scale Head surprisingly handed Riley the coffee cup. His cowl was more ornate than hers, with taller bumps on the scales and a gold lining inside the hood. “Got your favorite. Where’ve you been? You missed your shift last night.”

“Out sick.” She faked a rasp.

“Yeah, you sound like crap. Why are your lenses extended?” This Scale-Head seemed to be Nelson’s manager or something.

“Broke.” She coughed in a way she hoped sounded realistic.

“37%. Hurry up.”

“See Manny in equipment for a new one.” The manager frowned. “You don’t want your coffee?”

“Don’t drink it.” The Amalgorithm warned her.

But the manager was staring at her, clearly waiting for her to try it. She needed to get away from him and get to the server room. Riley only pretended to sip from it just in case it was poison. The Amalgorithm started to say something, but Riley spoke first. “Thanks. Um… got to pee.”

Riley turned and headed toward the restroom sign. Luckily, it was down the same hall as the server room. She got about ten feet before a klaxon buzzed angrily, and red lights flashed.

“You’re not Nelson.” A gun hammer cocked. “Nelson hates plain coffee.”

“I did try to warn you. Also, I didn’t say anything earlier so you wouldn’t panic. But since survivability is 2%, you may as well know that’s Draco Rex.”

Riley turned to face the pistol pointed at the space between her eyes. She thought 2% was optimistic.

The Dragon King pressed something on his cowl. “Attention all staff, there is a spy on premises. Assume an R.D. is inbound. Fry the servers and evacuate. I’ll lay out the welcome mat.” Then Draco Rex pulled the trigger, and the gun roared.

Riley shut her eyes and waited for death. And waited. And waited. Death never came. She opened her eyes and flinched at the large-caliber bullet inches from her brow. It hovered as if suspended in ballistics gel.

Blank stood between Riley and Draco Rex. She held up a hand, controlling the entire building’s negative space. “I don’t know what’s going on here,” she growled, glaring at Riley, “but your deal is off.”

Part VI

New Top Fear Number 1: Pissing off Blank.

Riley had survived because Blank charged in the moment the mask camera picked up Draco Rex. Unfortunately, Blank now believed Riley had stolen a Scale-Head uniform to commit a robbery and then taken the deal under false pretenses. Riley was now charged with robbery, lying to G.U.A.R.D., and obstructing their investigation.

With nothing to lose, Riley had tried telling Blank the truth. But it was her word against government records. Even if G.U.A.R.D. agreed to have a Telepath scan Nelson, he was in the wind. Nelson had quit her job at the Night Owl Café via email, sold her valuables, sublet her apartment, moved her money into offshore bank accounts, and skipped town, presumably to pursue an exciting new hacker-for-hire career.

“How did you not notice the coffee prank?” The Amalgorithm was not pleased about spending the next few decades locked up with minimal data input. “You knew Nelson liked sweet coffee.”

“I didn’t taste it!” She threw up her hands. “I was trying to get us out of there.”

“You didn’t smell it?”

“I had other things on my mind!”

The door whooshed open and Blank entered, staring at her. “I was just in the observation room with our Telepath. I wanted her to reexamine you since you fooled her first scan. According to her results, you’re not only the real Riley Gardner but probably the world’s most powerful Datapath.”

Riley had never heard of an official word for her power, but that hardly mattered. “Does that mean I can have my life back?”

“G.U.A.R.D. is working on it, but it’ll take time. Nelson was thorough.” Blank considered her. “Riley, do you realize with your datapathy, you could become an expert in… everything?”

“Oh.” That was disappointing, but she was glad not to be (hopefully) headed to prison anymore. “Guess I won’t have trouble finding a new job, at least.”

“Riley…” Blank smiled, “how would you like to work for G.U.A.R.D.?”