Blue, like her eyes

Her eyes were glazed, unresponsive. She sat motionless and slack-jawed, tied to the trunk of a tree closest to Sacha’s tent. My gaze fixed upon the curves of her lips; the bottom one was caked in blood from the fight she’d put up. It’d taken Sacha an hour to hold her still while I shot her with the sedative. Days later, she finally awoke, but she looked dazed.  

Damn it! I looked away, frustrated with myself for having stared at her for too long. She was a liar, a murderer and the reason we were camping in the forest while the rest of our people were hunted by her squad. She led them straight to our hideout, pretending she was our captive and playing with our trust when she swore to be our ally in exchange for her freedom.  

I could still hear their screams at night, how they were beaten to death or forced to watch their families killed while they slowly bled out. Every time I closed my eyes, I’d wake up in cold sweat, unable to wash my memories away no matter how many hot tears I shed. It was her plan all along, and we’d—I’d—fallen for it... I’d let them be killed.  

My knuckles turned white around my spear and I clenched my jaw to stop the stinging in my eyes. It was hard to swallow the rock in my throat, but when I saw a flicker in the corner of my eye, I forced it down and glanced at Evana as she started to stir. It took all my willpower to keep myself from impaling her with my weapon.  

Her eyes—a gradient of blues—locked on mine and she gasped; she had the nerve to look scared. I bit the insides of my cheeks. “Awake, are we? It must’ve been stronger than we’d thought.” Sacha said, turning the vial of remaining sedative we had between his fingers. He was perched on a high branch on a tree that lined our camp, surveying the area.  

Evana didn’t glance up to see, but I knew she’d heard him. “Where are we?” 

“None of your concern,” I ground my teeth, hating the way her voice made my heart pound. “Where are we!?” she insisted, taking shaky breaths. Sacha studied her for a moment, and answered with his eyes still on her, “a day’s journey for your base.”  

I scoffed as Evana’s expression morphed from petrified to horrified. She struggled against the rope, chafing her skin. “Oh, please,” Sacha sighed. “We have to get out of here!” 

“And to think the past few days had been so peaceful.” 

“Sacha, please—” 

“Another word, and I’ll knock you out again.” I spat out, reeling in my temper like a feral dog on a fraying leash. Evana had the sense to stop pulling at her bonds, but still looked desperate.  

Closing my eyes to steel myself, I refused to face her. Even in the dark, I could still feel her gaze upon me, on every muscle that feathered as I shifted, every rise and fall of my chest as I tried to keep my breath even. Ignore it, ignore it, ignore it. Heat spread across my cheeks to the tips of my ears. I heard Sacha leap to another tree; he probably wanted to scan the grounds for scouts.  

A nap would be too risky, but I decided to rest while I could. My mind would swim with thoughts of Evana all night long; she’d appear in my dreams, hold my hand, stare into my soul and smile. Every time I woke up, she’d be there. Unconscious, but right there, as if my dreams were taking form. I hated it. 

Hours past as I listened to the trees sway and the river nearby bubble. Evana stayed silent, but her presence spoke volumes for her. When she shifted, I flinched, hand hovering over the spear that lay by my side. “I can’t move.” she stated. 

“I know, we made sure of it.” 

“Then you have nothing to fear.” 

“I’m not afraid of you.” I opened my eyes but trained them to focus on a patch of flowers ahead of me. Shades of blue... like her eyes. Damn it. 

I heard her take in a breath as if she were about to speak, but Sacha appeared in an instant as he landed with a thud. “Overheard a couple of scouts. They're expecting a van carrying more captives in a few hours. It’s our chance.” Sacha grunted. I stood up, brushing myself down, “perfect, where do we meet it?” 

“The road winds past a cliff; we’ll ambush them there and hopefully drive them into a corner. Save anybody they’ve caught. The chaos will help hide our tracks.”  

“Hopefully,” Evana repeated mockingly. We ignored her and started packing our supplies, stamping out the fire and checking our weapons. “Listen to me. I saw something—a dream or a vision—they're bating you.”  

“How many explosives do we have left?” 

“Five.” 

“We’ll make do.” Sacha slung his satchel over his shoulder. “No, you won’t. They’ve prepared for it! You’ll be taken!” Evana started pulling at her ropes again. She sounded as if she were recalling an unpleasant memory.  

“I’ll go clear a path for us. You plant the bombs at the areas I've marked.” Sacha instructed before disappearing into the trees again. “You two cannot seriously think you stand a chance against an army of highly skilled—” 

“We managed to take you down just fine.” I raised my voice, feeling anger boil under my skin. “Barely,”  

“Who’s tied to the tree?” flexing my fingers, I pushed down the idea of wrapping them around her throat.  

“It was like I lived through it. Everything was so clear and real. They’re anticipating an attack, but they think they’re more of you. They’re prepared for war. Your little firework display is a party trick compared to their defences!” Evana practically snapped. When I didn’t reply, she had the audacity to sound hurt. “I’m trying to save you!”  

My spear was at her chin in a flash, our eyes locked while her neck lay exposed to the tip of my weapon. “You. Killed. Hundreds of us! You murdered and tortured and scarred. We trusted you, believed in you and you betrayed everybody by leading them to us.” my eyes burned.  

Evana’s breath hitched, but she didn’t look away. “Please, please believe me.”  

“I did!” my weapon pierced her pale skin, drawing blood. “I did believe you! I did—” I hadn’t realised my voice was cracking until I couldn’t speak anymore. She had been their spy. She had led their forces to our camp and ravaged it. All the innocent lives that were taken, all that were enslaved, they had welcomed her with compassion.  

I knew this... so then why do I yearn for her? Before her rouse had been discovered, we’d sat beside each other in the evenings, her head resting in the crook of my neck, watching the orange sun set beneath the purple horizon. Sometimes she’d fall asleep. 

“But it doesn’t matter now,” steeling myself, I took a deep breath, “you chose your side. Now deal with it.” I was close enough to feel her breath on my face. A drop of sticky blood fell on my finger which was when I drew back my spear. “Don’t even think of escaping, or I'll shoot you with something lethal this time.” my threat didn’t even convince me no matter how much bitterness I channelled into it.  

Just as I pulled away, Evana lurched forward. She bit down on the sleeve of my shirt, her teeth sinking into my shoulder. I kicked at her, and even though she was still tied up, she refused to budge. “What is wrong with you?!” my shoulder flared with a sharp pain.  

Before I could register it, Evana had broken free from her bonds, her skin scraped red. She pounced on top of me, pinning me to the ground with my arms squeezed to my sides. I could do little more than wriggle. She panted, finally releasing my shoulder, leaving it soaked with a ring of her saliva. Underneath my shirt, my wound felt raw.  

“You have to listen to me.” Evana’s lips were moments from mine. My mind buzzed. Her honey scent dulled all my senses. “Get off,” I managed, though it lacked much conviction. Her stormy eyes had me drowning in them. I could hear my heart beat, slow but loud. “Listen to me!” she shook me hard enough to knock the wind out of me.  

Evana's nails dug into my arms. Clenching my jaw, I tried to avert my gaze, but she followed it, pressing her forehead to mine. Hot tears rolled down the sides of my eyes. “Trust me, just one more time. Trust that I want to keep you safe!” her words were so clear; no one would doubt their intention. This is what I was afraid of... 

I had no choice but to stare back at her as she gradually melted my insides. My eyes softened. My muscles went lax. Every neurone was now attuned to her alone. Gingerly, she leaned closer so her lips grazed my temple. Any last reserve of a struggle within me dissipated. Something resembling a whimper escaped me as I turned my face so my nose brushed her ear. “We have to stop Sacha.” she whispered. I pray I don’t regret this.