Standing Here, Was This Only a Dream?

"I was not sure where I was at this very moment, whether it would be real or only a dream. I stood in the same spot trying to think about what this was and where."

"I was left there, but not sure when and why I was standing there, not sure where it was, I was supposed to be or how I managed to be in that location at this very moment."

"I looked in the direction I figured I had come from and with no visible signs to give me clues, this was not clear to me. Not in my mind, not being seen with my eyes and not making any sense."

"I was unaware of the various passer byers who were not too concerned about what a man, dressed in pajamas and slippers, would be doing at this ungodly hour out in the middle of nowhere and not sure what I was doing there."

"Not knowing what the purpose of this matter was, whether it was to teach me a valuable lesson or make me feel alone and neglected, possibly feeling dejected."

"I was beginning to feel panic and worried that I was lost or had a case of amnesia from being hit across the head with a blunt object. I reached to feel the back of my head and when I looked at my hand, it was covered in blood."

I had never experienced this feeling of being by myself or being the only one aware of such a cruel way to punish someone, when I had no idea what the reason was."

"I was seeking out all possibilities of something or someone who could help me figure this out or lead me in the right direction to find out what I needed to start looking."

"How then was I not able to remember what had taken place before the moment when I awoke to see this area and have no recollection of anything having happened?"

"The longer I thought about this, the more confused I became and the more I dwelled upon on this, the greater the throbbing and pain in my brain and head became more unbearable."

"I was not sure if I was coming or if I was going in the direction, whether it would lead me forward or thrust me backwards."

"I saw things." "I heard things." "I reached out to grasp things and touched something, that was not clear, but it was there."

"Speaking of where this is, I was surely making progress as I stepped forward, with a heavy fogged mind and blurry vision." "I moved onward to find that my steps became heavier and slower."

"I leaned on something that didn't move yet was annoyed by my being there." "The thing I was leaning on was a cow and its mooing gave it away, even though I was still having blurred vision."

"I jumped at the sound and was moving away, when I fell down and was falling over a cliff." "I yelled and screamed."

"I was still falling when I hit the floor below my bed awaken by the sudden jolt and sitting up, I was sweating and scared."

"I was now in a room with only a bed, a sink, a toilet and those damn annoying bars." "Wait, why were those bars there?" "Had I been in this place all the time and had they drugged me to think I was dreaming about the dream I had before?"

"I was approached by two men dressed in the all white suits who would give you drugs you didn't need for imaginary illnesses that you may or may not actually have or minor cases of such illnesses that did not even exist."

"The two men grabbed me, threw me back into the bed, introduced a syringe and poked the needle part into my upper right arm." "OUCH!!!!" "I yelled."

"It was bad enough that I was not sure where I was before here then I am here somewhere else now and still have no idea where I am or why I am here?"

"I am getting angrier as time goes on, then I fall asleep." "Ah nice peaceful sleep." "Until I am shaken violently awake and tortured."

"Damn let me sleep." "They did not seem to hear me, or they were fading away, and in their place, was a doctor, a couch and me lying flat on it, strapped to it with no room for movement."

"The doctor spoke in a language that I was not aware of, letting the Rs and the Ls sound like they were silent." "The doctor was unable to get through to me and threw his notepad at my head, hitting my forehead, knocking me unconscious."

"I opened my eyes to find myself back at the first place and was now being followed by large bullish type policemen who were keeping up with my every step that I made." "I was not able to shake them, and they were never fooled by my tricks."

"Falling to my knees, I begged and pleaded for them to let me either sleep or share with me where I was at." "They all stopped, peering at me with evil beady eyes, still laughing and said, "NO!!!!"

"The eerie echoes of their hollowed-out laughter and they repeated "NO!!!!" was more than I could stand, as I removed a knife from my jacket pocket."

"I lashed out and swinging wildly, I was hoping to hit my target." "It was then I opened my eyes and seen that I had only hit several sacks of flour instead."

"Damn this is not real nor am I even hitting or hurting anyone as long as I am allowing others to control me and run my life."

"This should be that simple, until I notice blood running down my leg onto the wooden floor." "I sighed and fell forward."

"If this is how things will end for me, then I only realizing NOW I am utterly, hopelessly, and completely lost."