Suzie Q

Are you there, God? It's me, Suzy Q, and I want you to stop Max from leaving me. I sat in a corner as if invisible while these thoughts ran in my head. I always give too much of myself. I don't know what I'm going to do now.

Max seemed lost in his own rhythm of sorting and packing. Then, the room began to slowly fill up with emptiness. All that was once familiar disappeared one by one into large brown boxes that smelt of sharpened pencils.

 The silence was uncomfortable and unusual. Finally, I couldn't bear it anymore. So I got up and made my way to Max. He looked at me, sighed and squeezed me in a tight hug. He buried his face into my shoulders. His shirt had the familiar smell of fresh detergent that I loved.

"Suz,” he whispered, “I'm going to miss you like crazy, you know that, don't you?”

And just like that, I forgave him for leaving me behind as he packed off for college. But anxiousness crept in quickly. What will happen to me? What am I going to do?

“Max, Suzie,” Ma’s voice broke through the silence, “lunch is ready. And Dad’s here.”

Max looked up, held my face in his hands and kissed my forehead.

"Come on, let's go down before Ma comes up."

Ma was waiting near the stairs, holding up three differently coloured lists. She was always making lists. Ma was practical but nervous. She had been preparing for Max's departure for ever so long, packing, unpacking, fretting and interfering with Max and my routines.

"Please, Max," Ma would shout out in her slightly high-pitched anxious tone. Max called it the dog whistle voice. “I need just thirty minutes of your time to place the order for the bed linen for your hostel.”

“Max, have you decided on which jackets to take?”

“Suzie, take these socks to Max’s room”.

Orders would be flying around the house and making us all nervous and irritable. But that’s Ma. A loving, protective woman who kept racing the clock.

Max and I walked into the dining room. The sunlight was streaming in and lighting up the darkly draped furniture and carpet.

Ma had chosen these dark coloured furnishings mainly because of how messy Max and I were.

Oh, I was going to miss Max so terribly, and it made me angry that he had to leave and I couldn’t go along with him. I knew this was what Max wanted. But what about what I wanted? No one seemed to ask me that question.

"I really love the new college, Suz," Max had told me about a month ago, “plus they are letting me join mid-way through the course." He paused and took a deep breath and looked at me, "but I am dreading the day I have to leave. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.”

We were sitting together in the garden that day, Max with his legs stretched out in front of him. The scars from the surgery were still quite visible near his knees. I lay down beside him thinking, how close we had grown in the last six months. We had spent a lot of time together. I had helped him with his things since he couldn’t move around a lot after the surgery. And Max spent hours teaching me new stuff.

Ma was so relieved. She had been so worried about Max.

As we all sat down at the table, Dad pulled out a gift from his bag and handed it to Max. It was relatively rare for Dad to come home for lunch, but everyone seemed to be making exceptional gestures for Max.

“Here you go, I hope you like it”, he said.

Dad had really agonised over what sort of gift to choose- should it be helpful, should it be an heirloom, should it be a memento. He had sat hours on his laptop, reading and thinking.

“Suzie,” he would ask me now and again, “what do you think of this?” Or, “do you think Max will like that?"

I did little to help, as I had no interest in finding gifts for Max. However, it seemed that he had finally zeroed in on a monogrammed wallet, in which he had tucked in some money.

“That’s for emergencies only, Max. Try not to buy PUBG merchandise with this,” Dad said with a chuckle.

Thanks, Dad, said Max pursing his lips together into a smile.

That was that. Dad was a man of few words.

Just as we began to eat, Dad’s mobile phone began to ring. He walked over to his phone and slowly went to the patio outside.

"Don't drink so much water before eating, Suz," Ma told me and pushed the plate of food in front of me, "you are going to…." She stopped mid-way through her sentence as her eyes looked up to meet Dad's.

Dad had that expression of deep confusion in his eyes, the same he did when searching for gifts for Max.

 “Max, that was your college administrator on the phone, he said, pacing each word slowly, “the government has announced that all educational institutions be closed immediately. It’s because of Covid-19. The college has sent us an email”

“What!” said Max shaking his head in disbelief, “Is this because of what’s happening in Italy and China?”

“I suppose so,” said Dad, still looking lost. He sat down and opened his laptop. Ma and Max rushed to his side of the table and bent over him as they read the mail in silence.

“So, you are unpacking then, Max?” asked Ma looking up.

 "Yes, I think so," said Max in a voice that trailed away.

I couldn’t quite follow what was happening.

Max sat back in his chair and put his hand on my head, “Suz, I don’t think I’ll be leaving, after all. I am staying back. It’s going to be you and me together again, buddy,” he said.

 Oh! The joy, the sheer happiness, made me jump up on Max' lap. I licked his face clean. Yes, yes, yes!!!

 I was ecstatic. Max began to laugh. Ma came and lifted me up and gave me a squeeze.

“Aw, Suzie Q, we are both delighted, aren’t we?”

I wagged my tail in agreement. Thank you, God, I said. But I don't think anyone in the room understood a word I said.