The Lost Finger

The Lost Finger

Short Story

Asmat lived in a well decorated two-storey bungalow with her son Shaheryar and daughter Nousheen, though she was unable to understand the ups and downs and zigzags of life, but even if she wasn’t contained with it, she wasn’t fed-up of life. In her mid-forties, she loved and cared for her family, and was a perfect example of South Asian housewife.

 Because of her children she used to ignore many things. She was married to her maternal cousin, if married life was a vehicle having two tyres, then it seemed like the front tyre of vehicle of her martial life was always puncture, or had low air pressure, due to which her married life was never in balance, and on the road of happiness and wishes it always stopped in the mid-way, that agony and deprival was part of her being.

She faced another blow while carrying her second child Nousheen, suddenly her husband caught a fatal mental ailment, and it was such a fatal ailment that no one was able to understand it. The only activity he used to do all the time was to count his fingers, while counting the fingers; he would call Asmat and ask her:

“Oh cousin! Look I have lost one of my fingers, don’t know where I have put it?”

Asmat would sit beside him and start counting his fingers and would tell him:

“Cousin, all your fingers are intact, either your senses are distorted or you have forgotten how to count!”

After hearing such words from Asmat, he started counting them by himself, and once finished said:

                 “Look, look one finger is missing….!” Asmat seeing such craziness of her husband laughed by heart, her son Shaheryar also laughed at his father’s such craziness.

Actually he was unable to realize that he was missing the pointing finger, one that he used for counting. He stopped behaving like a fool, when Asmat would leave him with agitated state of mind, seeing Asmat leaving, with innocent face always said to her:  

“Cousin, don’t become angry, if you are saying all the fingers are present, then they must be present…. I might be mistaken, what should I do, I think I am losing my mind….!”

Hearing that Asmat always took a cool deep breath and murmured inaudible words in her lips, while he too speaking to himself usually left for the guestroom. When Nousheen was born, he took her in his arms and started counting her little fingers, he had laughed loudly saying:

 “Oh dear! She has complete fingers; people think I am crazy or misguided. I think my mind is working properly.” 

Soon the news of Asmat’s husband becoming crazy was spread in the neighborhood like wild fire. In such a terrible mess, Asmat took care of her children and husband. She took him to good psychologists and spent handsome amount on his medicine, but her husband was unable to get cure from such ailment. 

When Shaheryar was enrolled in university, Nousheen too reached the age to be admitted in school. After Asmat’s father passed away her brothers gave her the bungalow and hundred acres of land, half of that was lost in her husband’s drinking and gambling habits, however, she managed the household expenses from the income that came from the remaining land. When Nousheen reached the age of eleven, she too caught an illness, she complained of being unable to sort out letters and words. Her mother took her to eye specialist and came to know that Nousheen was losing her eye sight. Though this problem was resolved but now she woke up with a shock every night. When she consulted her psychologist regarding her daughter, she was told her daughter might have nightmares, and that would continue for some time, and the doctor had assured her she would be alright.

“To change her mind, provide her light entertainment,” the psychologist said. After that Shaheryar went to city and brought a tablet for his sister, it had different games and cartoon videos.

During the final year of his BS at university Shaheryar received a laptop under PM’s Laptop scheme, and when he returned home during vacation, his routine had completely changed, from early age Shaheryar used the upper portion of the bungalow, during the vacation he restricted himself to his room upstairs, and avoided to meet and talk with family members, he started spending most of his time on laptop.

 Whenever his mother saw him using the gadget, she taunted him:

“What’s special in that device that you spend entire day using it?”

“Thesis mom…. It’s my final year at university…..and please don’t disturb me,” he told her. Before he got hold of the device he used to meet his friends, but now he started to avoid them as well, he refused to meet any of his friends, who would come to meet him; however, it was only Amjad, with whom he spent half an hour or so daily over a cup of tea.

Seeing her son’s such condition Asmat started to worry and told herself: other children too study in universities but none behaves like him…. And started to wonder that her entire family had caught some kind of mental disease…..

I thought, Shaheryar was a normal kid, but now it seems he too has lost his mind, once a thought came to her mind. On other occasions she told herself for peace of mind:

 “It might be true that due to burden of studies Shaheryar is behaving oddly, and once he completes his graduation everything would be fine.”

Many times she had caught her son laying on his tummy and using the laptop and whenever she came to give him a cup of tea or meal, he used to jump out of his bed hearing the footsteps approaching his bedroom, he took tea or meal by standing beside the door without letting anyone enter the room. Or whenever he was unable to hear footsteps, and the door would open, he immediately shut the flip screen of his laptop.

It was a Friday, Shaheryar woke up at 11:00 o’clock and without coming downstairs he screamed for tea and opened the laptop. Few moments later, Asmat came to his room carrying a cup of tea, as he heard his mother’s footsteps, he came out from bed and stood beside the door, he took cup of tea from Asmat and returned back.

“Son today is a blessed day of Friday, take a shower and go for Friday prayer,” Asmat said with caring voice: “No one knows about the whereabouts of your father, he went to visit fields last week and had not returned yet.”

Shaheryar nodded his head and started drinking tea, his mother left to complete her household chorus. After he finished tea he went to bathroom and took a shower but rather going for prayer as told by his mother, he once again opened the laptop.

 Suddenly his cellphone buzzed, it was Amjad on the other side, he received the call and went out of his room, he came to know that Amjad was waiting for him outside, taking quick steps he went out of the house. From the verandah where Asmat was washing the clothes, she saw Shaheryar going out from house, she stood up thinking: let me bring his dirty clothes for washing. And went upstairs to his room, she saw that the laptop’s screen was bent a little bit but it was still on, and she could see the light of the screen and heard strange voices of moaning. She sat on the chair and lifted the screen up, she was caught by the scene on the screen, her son was watching porn, a strange feeling arose inside her belly, Asmat started to fondle her left breast, while her other hand reached between her legs and one of its fingers was lost.