Nosebleed Seats

For Jesse, the thought of it was silly at first. I dared him, and we laughed. Bright as the moon, his crescent-shaped smile dimmed, and it changed into a thoughtful grin. His cloudy vision cleared up when his imagination ironed his eyelids, and he wondered what would happen if he could be so bold.

I noticed the switch, leaned forward over my sparkling wine and whispered, “I double-dog dare you.” I smiled with anticipation. Sitting back into my seat, I was proud of myself. Maybe all he needed was a little push – someone to make that first serve – to challenge him. I liked the thought of my words bouncing around in his head like a tennis ball from one ear to the other. He’s stubborn. Surely enough though, I was winning this match.

“Erica!?” Jordyn shouted, but remained composed. She couldn’t imagine those two ever kissing. “Yeah right. Please don’t go kiss Erica.” She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, I triple-dog dare you, Jesshe!” Sourly inebriated, Emily slightly fudged her words, but her jubilant energy backed me up.

We started this little game of Truth or Dare because we were bored, drunk adults at a Memorial Day party in my backyard. Yes, this is usually a game children and teens play, but it’s probably more fun these days. Think about it. Who dares tell the real truth? What truth lies behind the dare one is willing to accept? Losing the game is easy if you don’t want to participate, but there are usually no winners. In this case, however . . . .

“So, you want me to just go kiss her?” Jesse said.

. . . . I wanted to see him win.

Jordyn pulled the bottle out of her mouth. “Wait, you aren’t serious are you?” Wide-eyed, she gasped as she watched me nod my head. She looked at Jesse and set her drink on the table. “You know she’s really happy with Kevin. They’ve been dating for three years!” She pleaded with Jesse.

           “There was a brief stint,” I said. “Only I knew, and Jesse. And Erica.” I frowned when I remembered.

“What!?” Jordyn looked at Jesse for clarification. Straight-faced, he didn’t object, and vaguely, but assuredly, answered her question.

“Kissh!” Emily cheered for Jesse. “Oh my god, do it!” Her cheeks were so rosy and warm. She looked like a sweet child. Innocently she played the game but didn’t bother to ask for details. I wasn’t sure if she knew what she was saying really, or if she was just too far gone to figure it out.

“Emily, shut up, come on.” Jordyn put her hand on Emily’s shoulder, holding her down. This made Emily laugh harder. Jordyn nervously chuckled, and she begged to know, “What the heck is going on here, guys?”

I erupted from my chair. A passionate gulp of wine slid down my throat to tame the words I planned to share, and I pointed at Jesse. “I know you love her, are you just going to let her get away forever?” It’s possible I was projecting. “Erica still has feelings for you. She’s just used to being safe and sound with Kevin. She’s just stubborn. Like you.” I hoped my little taunt would jab him into action.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Jordyn said. I yanked my arm away when she touched it. I glanced at her face and noticed she was frightened. She tugged on the sleeve of my flannel again. The inflexible gesture begged me to come back to earth. “Yo, guys let’s chill. Seriously.” I sat back down in my chair, but my eyes remained on Jesse’s.

“What’s gotten into you?” Jordyn whispered to me with beer breath. She had her left arm on my flannel and her right arm still holding our other more heavily saturated friend. Desperately, she tried taming the beasts.

Suddenly Billy appeared. Exiting the house through the kitchen door. He smiled at us, seemingly obliviously, and as he closed the screen door with his pinky, he masterfully harmonized one opened and three unopened beer bottles with the rest of his hands. “Guys! Hey!” He finally got the door closed. “Kevin just texted me, and said that we’re gonna play Truth or Dare down by the fire!” He threw up his open beer for a quick swig before adding, “I haven’t played it since, like, sophomore year high school or something like that. I feel like, it’s gonna be real weird.”

Jordyn's apprehensive reply was, “Yeah, Sure! That could be interesting. We’ll see you down there.” She nodded quickly, hoping her short response would shoo him away from the scene that he unsuspectingly pounced upon.

“Oh, I want to play!” Emily cheered. She was up for absolutely anything tonight, it seemed. Even another game of Truth or Dare.

“Sick!” Billy said as he meandered his way onto the yard and towards the party. The pit was about fifty feet away from the backyard patio. So, the rest of the party thankfully did not notice any of the drama at our table.

Emily stayed put in her chair because Jordyn did not let her leave. She sulked for a second and sipped her beer. “Okay, Jesse.” Jordyn said, acting like a mother her was helplessly losing control of her children. “I don’t know what happened between the two of you, but I do know that now is not the right time or place . . . .”

There may have been a big fire fifty feet away, but the real one was something I created. Jordyn lectured the three of us and tried to blanket the situation so that it wouldn’t spread. As she did this, I was peering over my shoulder watching Billy. He had just made it back to party when he dropped his beer and spilled it in the grass. I saw him look back at it, he was frustrated for a moment, but quickly shrugged it off. Why cry over spilled beer? I was jealous of him. Effortlessly able to let go of something he had so skillfully held onto for so long. It truly was impressive watching him maneuver through the kitchen door. What a shame to see him lose it.

It was then I started to feel a little dizzy. I had had too much sparkling wine, I think. When I decided to tune back into station Jordyn, she was saying, “. . . . and if you do that, I won’t forgive you, Jesse,” but I think she meant to say my name.

“I’m going over there,” Jesse said. “You’re right.”

“If I was right then you wouldn’t go over there!” Jordyn sighed. He was talking about me, I thought.

“You’re right, she’s right!” Emily exclaimed, smiling at me.               

Emily was purely elated. She shrugged off Jordyn’s hand and thrusted out of her chair. Though, when I realized that she was about to push Jesse. I tried to intervene. “Wait, Emily!” I said, I reached across the table for Jesse, but was too slow. “Don’t, I was wrong. Jesse shouldn’t do this.”

When Emily pushed him, she did it with both hands. It was a strong, lively shove. In one motion, she ripped away Jesse’s balance and any last sense he had with him. He fell off the patio onto the grass. “I’m going to do it. You were right. I love her,” He looked right at me and said, “Thank you,” while quickly finding his way back to his feet. I’m sure, at the time, he had imagined the moment to be like a rom-com movie, and it was like that for him.

But for me, it was a tragedy. It’s all about perspective, you know. Sometimes, you can watch a movie, but when you talk about it with other people you might think, Did we even watch the same movie? Yet, yes we all experienced the same film, and the climax was happening at that very moment.

“Oh my god,” Jordyn held her hands to her head, realizing she never had control over the situation anyway and that her blanketing technique in no way stood a chance. The fire was out of control and spreading to the party. She smacked her boots together as she shuffled out of her seat and the chair legs scraped against the brick. She killed me with a look and chased after Jesse.

At the time, I was already dead. Suicide.

I walked around the table. Instead of trailing after Jordyn and Jesse, I put my arm around Emily and witnessed the consequences of my actions. That’s when Emily started giggling, “Oh, wait, wait. Truth or Dare?” She asked. An ornery smirk grew on her face.

“Emily, I don’t know,” I sighed. “Uh, Truth.” I watched the short chase come to a halt, I felt guilty, now. I know that Jesse and Erica had something, but was this the way? Did I ruin this for them?

She smacked her thigh. “I was hoping you’d say that!” She snickered, clearly drunk.

I watched from the nosebleed seats. Jesse tapped Erica on the shoulder, she smiled at him. Beautiful and sparkling. He had reached his finish line and pulled his prize in for a kiss. Jordyn knelt to the ground in defeat and mouths gaped around the fire for Jesse did not ask Erica for a room. “I love you,” I think I heard Jesse say something like that as he held the paralyzed hand of Erica’s.

“Doooo youuu loveeee Jessshee?” Emily asked me, drunk, but clearly. She said each word slowly and with purpose. Did she really know? How did she know?

“He doesn’t love me,” I said, indirectly answering Emily. Kevin smacked Jesse across the face, and like a flurry of hot ash, gasps and shouts spewed from the fire in all directions. My tail went in-between my legs, “He probably never will, now," I whimpered.

“Oh, damn.” Emily responded either to my answer or to the gnarly jab that sent Jesse to the ground, I think. Then she put her arm around me, vomited on the table, and a tear came to my eye. I sat back down. I was going to be sick.